For friends and lay people unacquainted with HRT, budding breasts are probably the most jarringly gender disorienting secondary sex characteristic they will notice. I was thinking I'd prefer to reveal by omission - as in, hey, if they notice, then I'll deny and cover up until I can't hide them anymore.

But thinking further, maybe it's better to have full disclosure up front and get it out of the way?

How did your friends react to realizing you have breasts growing for the 1st time?

How did you manage their reactions?

I'm old enough to brush it off as old man man boobs. 

Especially seeing I have no intention of transitioning at this point.  Wearing dark loose clothes works well.

I came out to the world on Facebook three months after I started E and had been full time already for a month.  I figured that if I was never going back to guy mode for any reason whatosever that everyone probably should at least get the memo.  So I guess I nipped it in the bud, so to speak.

At that point I basically didn't give a f*** anymore.  If people didn't like it, tough.  Life's too short to waste time with people that suck anyway.

Some people reacted poorly, and I'm glad that I know now what those people were actually made of.   The vast majority of my friends were good and supportive right from the start, and they all see the changes for the better.  Hey, at least I'm not that fat, obnoxious a*hole who would totally drink your last beer while you weren't looking anymore.

I was able to keep mine relatively concealed under loose shirts. I've had tiny, slightly noticeable boobs for a long time though, ever since I tried transition in 1990, so maybe when they started growing again nobody noticed for that reason.

As soon as mine grew I started with push up bras - no way was I going to hide them! I am fairly positive that my friends and colleagues noticed straight away

I dealt with their reactions by enjoying my new life.

Cindy what kind of reactions did you receive? Full spectrum? Exasperation?

For me this was a non-issue.  I wore a sports bra from the time I made my decision to transition until 3 months later when I started HRT.  At that point, in the space of a few weeks I told all the people in my world that I was transitioning, and well, breasts are part of the deal.   From that 3rd month I started to present as a girl and started wearing push-up bras, since girls do mostly have some visible breasts.

Evelyn, are you implying that you are not presenting as a woman in public, hence you wonder what friends will think?

Quote from: Evelyn K on June 28, 2014, 02:19:30 AM
Cindy what kind of reactions did you receive? Full spectrum? Exasperation?

People tried to avoid questions but were obviously quizzical - they just didn't know what to do or how to react. Men reacted differently to women colleagues with more 'stares'.

I very quickly realized that I had burnt every bridge and it was time to face it.  So - I announced to my colleagues that I was transgender and would be presenting as me. I did that on a Friday and turned up to work on the Monday in a skirt and blouse.

Game over.

They had to deal with it because I already had.

Quote from: Julia-Madrid on June 28, 2014, 02:23:12 AM
For me this was a non-issue.  I wore a sports bra from the time I made my decision to transition until 3 months later when I started HRT.  At that point, in the space of a few weeks I told all the people in my world that I was transitioning, and well, breasts are part of the deal.   From that 3rd month I started to present as a girl and started wearing push-up bras, since girls do mostly have some visible breasts.

Evelyn, are you implying that you are not presenting as a woman in public, hence you wonder what friends will think?

Yes. I present androgynous. Each day that goes by with interactions with friends I find I'm subconsciously pushing my shoulders forward so my shirt doesn't 'poke' as much. I also hate walking into those headwinds.

It's starting to become a chore

Quote from: Cindy on June 28, 2014, 02:24:39 AM
People tried to avoid questions but were obviously quizzical - they just didn't know what to do or how to react. Men reacted differently to women colleagues with more 'stares'.

I very quickly realized that I had burnt every bridge and it was time to face it.  So - I announced to my colleagues that I was transgender and would be presenting as me. I did that on a Friday and turned up to work on the Monday in a skirt and blouse.

Game over.

They had to deal with it because I already had.

You have tits of steel Cindy.

Quote from: Evelyn K on June 28, 2014, 02:34:31 AM
Yes. I present androgynous. Each day that goes by with interactions with friends I find I'm subconsciously pushing my shoulders forward so my shirt doesn't 'poke' as much. I also hate walking into those headwinds.

It's starting to become a chore

Aaargh - the androgyne look!!!   I did that for a few weeks outside work and then just decided to make the jump - seriously I found I got many fewer stares as a girl than I did as a boy-girl.

How are you feeling about making the jump Evelyn, or is it far off?

Quote from: Evelyn K on June 28, 2014, 02:36:26 AM
You have tits of steel Cindy. 

Oh when I walked to my office that first day I met one of the IT people in the corridor who didn't know. He looked at me and just said 'does this mean we have to remember to put the seat down in the loo?' I just said that I would be using the female toilet from now on, he said 'thank god because my wife and daughter keep telling me off at home and I don't want that to carry over to work'

Quote from: Jill F on June 28, 2014, 01:48:54 AM
I came out to the world on Facebook three months after I started E and had been full time already for a month.  I figured that if I was never going back to guy mode for any reason whatosever that everyone probably should at least get the memo.  So I guess I nipped it in the bud, so to speak.

At that point I basically didn't give a f*** anymore.  If people didn't like it, tough.  Life's too short to waste time with people that suck anyway.

Some people reacted poorly, and I'm glad that I know now what those people were actually made of.   The vast majority of my friends were good and supportive right from the start, and they all see the changes for the better.  Hey, at least I'm not that fat, obnoxious a*hole who would totally drink your last beer while you weren't looking anymore.

Yeah - I like your fearless vibe Jill. 

Hope you don't mind a guy popping in, but I wonder if you could just not mention them, period, and just tell people you're trans when you're ready. How many people are going to ask you what's going on with your chest? I imagine most people would feel rude or weird about asking and making a scene. Especially when, while they will be noticeable, the growth is still fairly gradual and you'll probably start off with A cups for a while.

I say this because I am clearly male at this point, and I've been showing up to work in a sports bra and thin t-shirt because it's too hot and my job is too active - I'd probably get a heat stroke if I tried to hide my chest! I'm sure some people have thought "geez, why does that guy have such big boobs?" especially when I had to run today and they jiggled. But no one has asked, and these are the type of people who have zero education on trans issues, so if they thought something was off about my maleness they'd call it like they see it.

Quote from: Cindy on June 28, 2014, 02:42:00 AM


Oh when I walked to my office that first day I met one of the IT people in the corridor who didn't know. He looked at me and just said 'does this mean we have to remember to put the seat down in the loo?' I just said that I would be using the female toilet from now on, he said 'thank god because my wife and daughter keep telling me off at home and I don't want that to carry over to work'

That's bust-a-butt-crack-in-my-nose hilarious. Seriously some of you gals take this game out of the trenches and bring it up and over. No fear.

Birkin, good point.

To be honest, people just don't care. Only *phobic creeps would say anything and their opinions mean nothing to me at all.

Quote from: birkin on June 28, 2014, 02:44:21 AM
Hope you don't mind a guy popping in, but I wonder if you could just not mention them, period, and just tell people you're trans when you're ready. How many people are going to ask you what's going on with your chest? I imagine most people would feel rude or weird about asking and making a scene. Especially when, while they will be noticeable, the growth is still fairly gradual and you'll probably start off with A cups for a while.

I say this because I am clearly male at this point, and I've been showing up to work in a sports bra and thin t-shirt because it's too hot and my job is too active - I'd probably get a heat stroke if I tried to hide my chest! I'm sure some people have thought "geez, why does that guy have such big boobs?" especially when I had to run today and they jiggled. But no one has asked, and these are the type of people who have zero education on trans issues, so if they thought something was off about my maleness they'd call it like they see it.

This is one dilemma I'm dealing with. I perspire easy and hate wearing anymore than I have to in the summer. Then there's the other issue of the bra printing through the shirt.

I've recently learned to use wide bandaids to flatten my nips. But as you can imagine it's inconvenient.

Quote from: Julia-Madrid on June 28, 2014, 02:41:33 AM
Aaargh - the androgyne look!!!   I did that for a few weeks outside work and then just decided to make the jump - seriously I found I got many fewer stares as a girl than I did as a boy-girl.

How are you feeling about making the jump Evelyn, or is it far off?

I'm thinking Sept. I'll have to convene with FalseHybridPrincess, we have a Sept pact

Yeah, I can imagine that would be uncomfortable. Well, I guess it depends what kind of bra you wear. You may feel like you'd be happier in a lacier one with proper straps, which makes sense given that you're moving towards self-expression as female.

Me, I wear the most butch ass sports bra, no padding, simple straps, literally just pull it over your head and go. I figure that if anyone ever asked about the sports bra I'd keep my answer simple and say that I got tired of my chest bouncing around and attracting attention, and that I liked the security of keeping them in place during the day. Because really, that is the truth lol. People don't need all the gory details.

Quote from: Cindy on June 28, 2014, 02:42:00 AM


Oh when I walked to my office that first day I met one of the IT people in the corridor who didn't know. He looked at me and just said 'does this mean we have to remember to put the seat down in the loo?' I just said that I would be using the female toilet from now on, he said 'thank god because my wife and daughter keep telling me off at home and I don't want that to carry over to work'

That's too funny! 

No one has made a comment about my moobs yet, I keep thinking the day of reckoning will come soon enough.