I'm thinking, "do I really wanna do this" and "how far do I go"? I gave up on finding an endo close and settled on one 70 miles away. They wanted a recommendation letter even just to make an appointment to discuss whether I should do low dose E or do T therapy as my wife would prefer.
I emailed my therapist, we went back and forth. She talked to the endo, then asked me some more questions. Now we have an appointment for tomorrow evening to discuss it and just maybe draft the letter. Forgot to mention, I'm my therapist's first trans client. The insurance company mis-labeled her. This has really focussed my mind. I do want to do this. I'm not really sure I even want to slow thus down anymore. If the inevitable outcome is that I transition completely and my marriage fails does it make any sense to slow it down and be less happy hoping my wife will come around?
She gets homophobic when it's close to her and has already told me she's too ashamed to talk to anyone about my being trans, not even a therapist.
Funny, I hadn't meant for this to be so long.