Common confusion I run into with people (including GLBT) is they fail to separate sexual orientation from gender identity. Additionally, they don't all understand what exactly sexual orientation means either.
I consider myself bi because I am attracted to men, women (genetic or post-op), and non-op/pre-op transsexuals. A lot of people would say that an experience between me and a non-op MTF would still be a gay experience. I don't see it that way. People further confuse gender and sex making the problem worse. While the non-op/pre-op TS would be male by sex (genitals), they would be female by gender. I see people by the gender they present and not by the mere physical attributes. So if I were on a date with a non-op/pre-op TS and I am also presenting as female myself (cross-dressed), that would actually be a lesbian experience. What is "underneath" is irrelevant. The two of us see each other as girls, treat each other as girls, and that is what defines it.
Ultimately what should occur ideally is for people to just stop worrying about labels to begin with. You have the right to be attracted to whoever you want and to present with whatever gender you want and you really don't have an obligation to answer to anyone except yourself as it is your life.
