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Do we grow old gracefully?

Started by Brenda E, July 11, 2014, 05:01:56 AM

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Brenda E

Perhaps an unusual question, but what happens to transwomen as they age significantly?  It obviously takes an extraordinary amount of work to maintain reasonable good looks throughout life, especially for us, but towards the higher end of the age spectrum - seventies, eighties, etc. - what happens?  Do we essentially just turn in to sweet little old ladies, just like every other little old lady out there, or do we still have to work our asses off to maintain the outward appearance of femininity?  Or perhaps by that age, most people have figured out how to stop worrying about what other people think?
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nikkit72

You will find that as cis women age, most become more masculine. We on the other hand, due to HRT, surgeries and such stand a chance of remaining more feminine looking than cis women. If you look at an older couple, the man has shrunk and gone grey and is quite close to the height and build of the woman in some cases due to the reduction of T and the woman has become more masculine due to the reduction of E. They are the invisible people. Sometimes it is only the mannerisms, voice, and the over use of floral and pink clothing that tells you that you are interacting with an older female.

This is just the way I see it, so I am probably wrong.

Oh, and in answer to the subject question -"Do we grow old gracefully?".

Hopefully not  :P

Nikki
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Jane's Sweet Refrain

I'm not sure whether there is a difference between the way transwomen and ciswomen appear as they age. Whether we grow old gracefully or not, I would think is not a matter of appearance, but of attitude. And that, trans or cis, is probably subject to the individual. (For the record, growing old? Kicking and screaming! Kicking and screaming, I tell you! ;))
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Ms Grace

I don't know about "gracefully" but I intend on ageing Fully Grace...  ;D
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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Sammy

Quote from: Ms Grace on July 11, 2014, 05:46:05 AM
I don't know about "gracefully" but I intend on ageing Fully Grace...  ;D

And being addressed to as "Your Grace"? ;)
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Carol2000

Without giving my age away, I won't see 50 again. Like you I used to look at sweet little old ladies and wondered if that would be me when I reached a certain age. Well my son is in his late 30s and I have no intention of allowing myself to become that sweet little old lady. In part it's probably the HRT, but most of us on here have gone through the period after transition where you started to look much more feminine and younger.

When it starts to go the other way, I think it's in our nature to do something positive about it, like exercise, choosing feminine clothes which make us look younger without looking ridiculous. . . and, for some, surgery.

I'm certainly not like most cis women of a certain age who just let nature take its course and use that as an excuse to let themselves go.

Recently I was talking to a cis gendered female friend who is quite a bit younger than me. These two young guys, probably in their mid 20s, came over and started chatting to us and I expected the attention to be on her as she is quite pretty. But the one with all the chat looked at me and said: "I bet you looked very fit when you were younger." I told him to not be so cheeky adding: "I'll have you know I still look fit."

I must admit that made my day, and I wasn't exactly wearing anything that could be regarded as sexy.

I have every intention to look as good as I can for as long as I can.
Caroline
x ;)
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suzifrommd

Never sure what was meant by aging gracefully. When I age I expect to look older. When I do a lot of aging, I expect to look really old. When I get into my 80s and 90s (if I'm blessed to live that long) I expect to look really, really old.

Doesn't have anything to do with being trans. People look old as they get older.

My conversations with older women who I know has convinced me that it's possible to be comfortable with your looks no matter how old you are.

As far as passability (which IS NOT THE SAME as good looks), the trans women I know of advanced age seem to pass well.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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stephaniec

pictures on the internet show transgender women the same cis women of similar age. I saw an interview once of one of Andy Warhol's trans models when she was older , she was beautiful . that interview always has stayed in my mind because she was so elegant
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Nicolette

They gradually start morphing back into their birth sex, grow beards, lose hair.. Why would there be any difference?

I don't know about transgender women, but I saw a picture once on the internet of a sasquatch.  :P
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Sammy

Quote from: Nicolette on July 11, 2014, 08:37:58 AM
They gradually start morphing back into their birth sex, grow beards, lose hair.. Why would there be any difference?

I don't know about transgender women, but I saw a picture once on the internet of a sasquatch.  :P

Was that a cis or trans-sasquatch?
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Nicolette

It's very difficult to tell the sexes apart. But judging from its furtive side glances I have to conclude that it was trans. It's only conjecture, mind you.
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Sammy

Quote from: Nicolette on July 11, 2014, 08:51:26 AM
It's very difficult to tell the sexes apart. But judging from its furtive side glances I have to conclude that it was trans. It's only conjecture, mind you.

Must have been very passable then... sigh.
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stephaniec

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Nicolette

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on July 11, 2014, 08:53:06 AM
Must have been very passable then... sigh.

Passable to us, but probably less passable to their own.  :laugh:

There's a chance that we are inclined to take womanhood for granted less than cis do. And whatever follows from that. But the "little", you can strike out immediately.
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Misha

There's really no telling how you'll in 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 or who knows how many years. Age is merciful to some but it tends to take it's toll based on your genes, life style, regime, diet, habits...

Personally I'd say the best guess would be looking at your mother and grandmother. DNA can't be denied especially given that it's interpreted the same way through sex hormones.

Or you can start saving a LOT of money for currently highly experimental projects in regenerative medicine and hope you'll get some years back. Perhaps in 2030 you'll be able to literally buy 10 years off your age :-) .
Semi-blind asperger transwoman. But do I care? No I don't. I love myself :-) .
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Evelyn K

I've wondered about the OP's question a lot and was going to open a similar topic. On the image blogging sites, it's all about the "TRAPS!" but you never see hottish traps over 20 y.o. or so to compare yourself to. :D

What gives? ???

(for research purposes only)
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Cindy

I am and shall grow old dis grace fully
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Nicolette

Quote from: Evelyn K on July 11, 2014, 02:04:43 PM
I've wondered about the OP's question a lot and was going to open a similar topic. On the image blogging sites, it's all about the "TRAPS!" but you never see hottish traps over 20 y.o. or so to compare yourself to. :D

"Traps"? When did this mega offensive term suddenly enter common parlance?
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Evelyn K

Quote from: Nicolette on July 11, 2014, 02:31:39 PM
"Traps"? When did this mega offensive term suddenly enter common parlance?

In the hetero circles it's been common for awhile.
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Nicolette

Quote from: Evelyn K on July 11, 2014, 02:33:30 PM
In the hetero circles it's been common for awhile.

Well, thanks for making me aware of it, but I can't think of a more derogatory term for a pre-op/non-op. I suggest you don't create a thread entitled such.  :o
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