Sweetie, You got this!  And I'm from Seattle, so I'll let you guess.

Quote from: HeatherR on July 16, 2014, 08:25:18 PM
Sweetie, You got this!  And I'm from Seattle, so I'll let you guess.

Let us catch y'all in the dome. PLEASE come to the dome just ONCE!!!!! lol

Lol!  You'll have to hang in there for that!   <3

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on July 16, 2014, 08:22:57 PM
I really just want somebody to talk to who can understand where I'm coming from. I don't feel like anybody can help me with how to move forward with this in my life and I'm just very scared of facing this. I cannot face this, it's not something I can beat.

Sorry... I didn't mean to be so hard on you. All I really want is for you to go and get the care that you need. Even though I don't really know you, and even though it's probably none of my business, too many people die senseless deaths in this world as it is. I know you must be terribly scared of what you're going to hear after the neurologist examines you (God knows I would be). I really hope you're going to get good news (or at least as good as the news can be, under the circumstances), and that this is going to be something you can laugh about later. But if that isn't the case... let's not even worry about that right now. It's easy to assume the worst when scary things start happening to your body for no apparent reason, but until you know what the problem really is, why not just assume the best?

You've been inspirational to me, especially on my first days here when I was lost and figuring myself out. Your posts helped me. I expect I'm not alone in that. Even if I am, you're already making a positive difference. The world would be a lesser place without you.

I used to live in Louisiana, I understand why you don't want to go to the ER. All the same, please DO go. Tonight would be best.

My roommate brought up another fear of mine. What if they cut off my HRT? I'll literally blow my skull out before I go back to that. I am not exaggerating on that at all.

I'm going with Shantel here.

You've been one who just got on with things.

Why stop now?  Don't give a stuff about what some idiot in the hospital might think - health care providers have been there, done that, got a crappy t shirt and malpractice lawsuit as well.  You're going to be another person in need of care, and that is all that will happen.

Get your arse to hospital.  If you kill yourself by not going that's one thing.  If it's an infarct (partial stroke) and doesn't kill you but leaves you a crippled vegetable, what do you think is going to happen?

And not knowing what is going on is putting more stress and strain - you are overthinking with not enough information.

Hugs and well wishes,
Luna

Embarrassment is just a mental state of mine. But If you do not want to stay here than your love ones will miss you and would be deeply hurt on the inside. Remember you might get a cure for your health problem , then you would have died for NOTHING for not staying here. A friend of mine had to deal with MS as well also having a cross dresser for a husband who she loved. Remember you HAVE people who love you both your mom and the people here.

I too have failing health: diabetes,DVT,had a heart attack,pain in my legs and feet because of DVT and diabetes,Inoperable kidney stone, and diabetic cirrhosis of liver. I stay here because my friends need me and I don't want to disappoint them by leaving. Some are major others are minor.

Just hang in there and LOVE yourself

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on July 16, 2014, 10:06:07 PM
My roommate brought up another fear of mine. What if they cut off my HRT? I'll literally blow my skull out before I go back to that. I am not exaggerating on that at all.

this is what I dread with my health problems

ulcerative colitis gives a higher risk for DVT, and if they say I need to get off of hormones down the line, I fear how I'd react

I hope there's the best news possible from the doctor given your situation

I doubt I have DVT. No symptoms are present. I just fear they'll try to keep me off of them just because they don't know what else it could be. I've had neurological symptoms from long before I started HRT. 2 GPs and a cardiologist have told me that what I'm experiencing is NOT from HRT. I know that it's not from hormones. But all it takes is one ->-bleeped-<- neurologist....

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on July 17, 2014, 07:51:07 AM
I doubt I have DVT. No symptoms are present. I just fear they'll try to keep me off of them just because they don't know what else it could be. I've had neurological symptoms from long before I started HRT. 2 GPs and a cardiologist have told me that what I'm experiencing is NOT from HRT. I know that it's not from hormones. But all it takes is one ->-bleeped-<- neurologist....

totally understand the fear of losing HRT. I'd be on the roof of my apartment if there was no way I could get hormones. the thing is you have to be alive to enjoy the beauty of womanhood. One day at a time to weigh all your options in worst case scenario . Find out what your dealing with first it just might turn out to be all right.

I'm sorry you are going through this and don't really know how to help.  I just wanted to say that I really hope it turns out okay in the end and am sorry you have to go through this. 

Is that referral for the neurologist anytime soon?  At the very least, seeing the specialist could get you further information about your condition without going into the hospital.  However, it's very likely that they would send you to the hospital if you have been immobile as they would likely need to do further testing and would require constant monitoring of your situation.

In any case, I don't intend to push you in any direction.  You have to do what's best for you and I hope everything works out for the best.   

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on July 17, 2014, 07:51:07 AM
I doubt I have DVT. No symptoms are present. I just fear they'll try to keep me off of them just because they don't know what else it could be. I've had neurological symptoms from long before I started HRT. 2 GPs and a cardiologist have told me that what I'm experiencing is NOT from HRT. I know that it's not from hormones. But all it takes is one ->-bleeped-<- neurologist....

Screw that neurologist. I'd have to be strapped down before they take my HRT from me. I saw a neurologist 2 months ago about dystonic cramping in my right hand. I never brought up being ts or taking hrt. But I can understand that your situation makes it almost impossible to not bring up these facts. So I sympathise.

I have no idea when I'll be seen by a neurologist. I have to wait for LSU to send me an appointment letter in the mail to know when that happens. That is, unless I want to pay out of pocket to see a neurologist sooner, which I don't have the money for.

I'm going to the ER today. I still can't walk. The spasms are down and my roommate says I'm doing better, and I've been able to feel the need to make a BM which is something I haven't been able to feel since Monday, so those are really good signs...

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on July 17, 2014, 08:35:41 AM
I have no idea when I'll be seen by a neurologist. I have to wait for LSU to send me an appointment letter in the mail to know when that happens. That is, unless I want to pay out of pocket to see a neurologist sooner, which I don't have the money for.

I'm going to the ER today. I still can't walk. The spasms are down and my roommate says I'm doing better, and I've been able to feel the need to make a BM which is something I haven't been able to feel since Monday, so those are really good signs...

well, sounds better, as others have mentioned you've been an inspiration to me too.

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on July 17, 2014, 08:35:41 AM....I'm going to the ER today. I still can't walk. The spasms are down and my roommate says I'm doing better, and I've been able to feel the need to make a BM which is something I haven't been able to feel since Monday, so those are really good signs...

Best of luck at the hospital today.  May the outcome be the best case scenario for you.

Quote from: Alainaluvsu on July 17, 2014, 08:35:41 AM
I have no idea when I'll be seen by a neurologist. I have to wait for LSU to send me an appointment letter in the mail to know when that happens. That is, unless I want to pay out of pocket to see a neurologist sooner, which I don't have the money for.

I'm going to the ER today. I still can't walk. The spasms are down and my roommate says I'm doing better, and I've been able to feel the need to make a BM which is something I haven't been able to feel since Monday, so those are really good signs...

I wish you the very best of luck at the hospital today. I just ran across your thread, and am so sorry to hear about your going through this. I also understand everyone's concerns. You've been very inspirational to everyone here, very much including myself, and we don't want to lose you.

I hate hospitals -absolutely hate em! Following my 91 accident I had more than my fill of hospitals to last me a lifetime. But, I also know that because I'm in transition, they are a necessary evil I must endure in order to have my surgeries, and their ER should something unexpected crop up interfering with my ability to function. I also very much understand your genital dysphoria, for I too feel the same way. Mine is so bad I keep a dish towel by my toilet to throw over myself when I pee so I don't have to look at the discusting repulsive abnormal thing that shouldn't have been there. So I understand all too well hun believe me. However despite that I also have come way too far, as I know you too have, to give up now just because of some health hiccup trying to  interfere with the happiness I've finally found in becoming on the outside who I've always been on the inside.

Feel free to pm me if you need to talk further. We're all here for you, Please know that.

Oh and let us know how things turn out. If you can, as someone suggested, take your laptop or tablet with you to the hospital.

Allie

Any news?  Hope you are ok!

I can't take losing yet another friend. First, FA, then Melody. You better not bite the bullet Missy! I'm gonna be driving truck soon. Dont make me come over there!

Seriously, please let us know!;)