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"oh, haha, they made a mistake..."

Started by TrojanMan, July 18, 2014, 02:36:20 PM

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TrojanMan

So I'll be getting my drivers license soon. My name is changed but there will still be that pesky little "F" >:( 
I was thinking of putting a little sticker or piece of tape over it, but then maybe that would just draw attention to it? What do you say to someone who goes "Why does it say female?" How do you handle this?

Kyler

I actually dated a guy who accidentally got marked "F" on his drivers' license. He hadn't got it changed because he said that they were trying to tell him he needed proof from a doctor?
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Annabella

Entirely depends where you live. California recently made it the law for example that drivers licenses etc should reflect the gender you present as. There is a push nationally to fix this for everyone, but it is an uphill battle as there are so few of us and so many bigots :P. As for covering it with a sticker, that might get you in legal trouble, and would probably call attention to it anyway... Frustrated on your behalf.
"But you can only lie about who you are for so long without going crazy."
― Ellen Wittlinger, Parrotfish
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aross1015

Mistakes do happen, though I think in the state ID department they are pretty rare.  I cash checks and do other money related transactions every day, all day at work and have only ever seen one ID where the sex marker didn't match the person's perceived sex and that was a young lady who had an M on her licesne, and I know it was a legitmate mistake and not a case of her being transsexual because a coworker is related to her. 
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randomdude5

I said "oh, haha, they made a mistake..." :P

Seriously though, that is what I said. LOL
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JayDawg

I'm not changing my gender marker until I know for sure my insurance will continue to cover female needs. If anyone questions the F, I'll probably just feign surprise and go, "Really?! I never noticed that! I just made sure my name and address were correct. Wow..." :D

-Jay





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Adam (birkin)

No one notices the gender marker. Like ever. I had a "M" when I looked like a girl and no one ever stumbled when they called me she. Similarly, for a time when I appeared male I had a "F". No one thinks anything of it, they go solely based on what they see when they look at you.
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CursedFireDean

Fun fact the DMV put the wrong birthday on my licence. And then they got huffy with me when I didn't IMMEDIATELY go back in to fix it. I was 15, I had no incentive to go back yet because it wasn't stopping me from doing anything. I mean really, how do you get a BIRTHDAY wrong on an ID? The annoying part was it said I was younger than I am.
To me the important part is my name gets changed on my licence. As long as my name is male, people aren't gonna care. If anyone makes a deal about it, I won't go back to their business, or I'll complain to a manager or someone like that.

My question is, since it's much easier to change your gender on your passport, what is stopping people from changing it on the passport, then bringing it in as 'proof' that the DMV got it wrong? Because a passport is an acceptable ID instead of a birth certificate.





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Bombadil

Like Jay, I'm not changing my gender marker until I'm sure I can get insurance coverage for female organ issues. I look at people's driver's license pretty often and I never look at the gender. I think it would be pretty rare that someone would notice.






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Whynaut

Honestly, no one ever notices. I'm pretty small and I only pass maybe 40% of the time. I've had "M" on my license for months and bartenders call me "she" all the time after carding me. No one looks.

But I think the mistake excuse is completely valid and easy to use.
"It's like everyone tells a story about themselves inside their own head. Always. All the time. That story makes you what you are. We build ourselves out of that story."
- The Name of the Wind
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Sebryn

Yep no one who actually checks or looks at licenses a lot ever looks. I don't and I check between 5-10 a day 7 days a week. After a while checking DL/ID/Permit cards you just really don't care to look and only check the info you need like a DOB, restrictions, expirations date and so on without bothering with the info you don't need to do your job.

I have seen incorrect gender markers on my students' permits though and the parents have to jump through hoops to fix a mistake the DMV/DPS made...it's stupid....and a very valid excuse to use as to why it's "incorrect" hah.
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Ms Grace

I'm so glad they don't use gender markers on drivers licences where I live in Australia. Why do they need them in the US?
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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devention

This whole "you have to jump through hoops to correct a DMV mistake" is insane to me. Shouldn't you just be able to show a correct, probably unmodified birth certificate to get it corrected!? Oh, red tape.
And nthing the "no one looks at gender marker" line, here. As a cashier, I have never looked at a gender marker on a DL/LP when checking ID for beer, cigs, etc. People base their gendering of you off what you look like, and if they "can't tell", your name.
Grace, I think the gender marker might be just because we're a slightly backwards nation that hasn't moved past that point yet. Best guess.
The more I know, the more I know I don't know.






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Maleth

Quote from: Ms Grace on July 19, 2014, 10:37:19 PM
I'm so glad they don't use gender markers on drivers licences where I live in Australia. Why do they need them in the US?

I wish it was this way in the US, I don't find it necessary to put gender markers on licenses and I'm sure that's not just my opinion.. :/
~Maleth
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AdamMLP

If I couldn't tell from looking at you I'd go by your name, if that was unisex then I'd possibly look at the gender marker. I'd imagine the majority of people who did spot it, if they did, would be too awkward to bring it up to be honest.

In the UK at have gender's on our licenses, but hidden within the license code that most people don't know.
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rexyrex

@lxndr i didnt know that, i thought there was no gender at all on the uk driving lic.

Yeah just say oh you never noticed, or made a mistake it if they said anything
Started Testosterone: 2013
Top surgery: 2014
Bottom surgery: 2016
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Ayden


Quote from: Ms Grace on July 19, 2014, 10:37:19 PM
I'm so glad they don't use gender markers on drivers licences where I live in Australia. Why do they need them in the US?

My dad once told me that it was for identification purposes, in the event that remains were unidentifiable. I'm not sure how accurate that is, but he was a cop so I always assumed that was the reason.
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LordKAT

FWIW, you can change the gender on your License and even SS without changing the one listed with your insurance.
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Felix

I wouldn't put tape over it. If you can get people to read you as male they will usually either not notice that detail or they will assume it is a typo.
everybody's house is haunted
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Sebryn

Yes I agree with the not covering it because that just draws attention there. I know someone here who got in trouble for "defacing" her ID by burning a hole where the M was on her ID. A cop noticed it when she was being arrested though so it could have just been an added charge on top of the others....you know how cops can be if you are being obnoxious to them. They can find all kinds of obscure laws no one knew about to charge you with. I don't think it's a common thing to worry about.
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