Susan's Place Logo

News:

Visit our Discord server  and Wiki

Main Menu

Was the first time your father saw you as a girl kinda weird?

Started by Brenda E, July 21, 2014, 02:01:10 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Brenda E

To be honest, I think about this a lot.  The next time I see my father, I'll probably be dressed as a girl, but I'll also have boobs.  The last time I saw him, I was 100% guy.  Or 90%, but he didn't see the other 10%.

The idea that my dad will see me with boobs is one that I find incredibly strange.  How did your own fathers cope with it?  Did you break them in gently?  Were they cool with it?  Any awkwardness as all?  Lots of alcohol involved to get through that first meeting?  Did he want to prod them?  Was there too much staring?

Stupid question, I know, but it's on my mind and I figured that I might as well ask.
  •  

RosieD

Not really TBH.  My old man had met with trans women before, even helping someone transition through the fun and games that was a factory floor in the 1970s when he was a production manager. 

Besides which I was buying him lunch and had already told him about transitioning months beforehand.  It might have been a bit different if the first he found out was when we arrived at the pub.  He probably wouldn't have trusted me to choose the wine for a start.

Rosie
Well that was fun! What's next?
  •  

Elanore joey

i fell really disgusted when round my dad and uncle the 2 main men in my life they talk to me in the same masculine way as before i came out such when seeing a woman with a revealing top on tv and they come with something like what do you think of her tits (i would prefer breasts or atleast boobs i fell these are not as harsh and masculine) like they make joke about wa**ing which make me feel sick but they just carry on taking to me like im a guy like them.
we are all beautiful in our own way its just some people don't see it :-*
  •  

Ms Grace

Hasn't happened yet because he hasn't wanted to meet me. When it does happen, and it will, he might feel weird about it but I won't.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
  •  

awilliams1701

My youngest sister wants to shelter he kids who now live with their dad from it. I don't think she understands even if I keep my mouth closed sooner or later I wont be able to hide it. Personally I don't know how long I'm willing to put off switching things around on Facebook for her. Once I change Facebook, that will be it. They both see me on there.
Ashley
  •  

YinYanga

My dad is a pretty typical macho man from the caribbean (despite him insisting he's doesnt have that caribbean thing ^^)

After I came out to him 2 years ago (Which he took much better than I expected: he feared I was getting harassed/bullied for looking gay/feminine) I gradually shifted my clothing from neutral to a little more feminine

I see him bi-weekly at my brother's house where we have lunch and this was the first time I really came over 'en femme' 

He stopped for a bit when seeing me, gazed and said "You look so much like your mother" We both laughed a little and had a good afternoon with the foods and cats
  •  

Eevee

I only heard stories since I was too young. For context, I was mistaken (his word, not mine) as a girl when I was really young because of my curly, long, blond hair. That same day, he cut all my hair off and put a baseball cap on me to make sure it didn't happen again. He never allowed my hair to grow long again... until I moved out and he couldn't stop me. I'm now afraid to let him know that I really was a girl and he was the mistaken one. His reaction probably won't be good when he sees me finally being myself.

Eevee
#133

Because its genetic makeup is irregular, it quickly changes its form due to a variety of causes.



  •  

Jill F

I feared it might get weird, but I think he "got it" as soon as he saw me smiling and happy for the first time since I was a child.

Actually, my father and I have spoken more in the last year than we did in the last 20.  I think that him retiring and me transitioning at the same time were the best thing that happened to our relationship that I once thought to be unsalvageble.
  •  

Eva Marie

It's happening at thanksgiving when I go to see my parents. I think my mom will mostly accept me and will just tell my dad to shut up if he's being negative. I'm just going to be me and they can like it or not.
  •  

melanie maritz

when I told my dad how I felt I wasn't in girl mode , but he started crying and went into great denial.

I don't actually remember the very first time he saw me as a girl but I'm pretty sure it was awkward for both of us
  •  

Sammy

Guess, I was lucky here, cause I never knew him and most probably never will. Sadly, but maybe if he was around, he would have taught me how to be a man...
  •  

Miss_Bungle1991

Quote from: Elanore joey on July 21, 2014, 03:23:36 PM
i fell really disgusted when round my dad and uncle the 2 main men in my life they talk to me in the same masculine way as before i came out such when seeing a woman with a revealing top on tv and they come with something like what do you think of her tits (i would prefer breasts or atleast boobs i fell these are not as harsh and masculine) like they make joke about wa**ing which make me feel sick but they just carry on taking to me like im a guy like them.

Yeah, I have this same problem. It's why I almost never see my dad or his friend. I don't really care if it upsets other people. I'm not putting up with their ignorance by being around them just to please other people. Using my legal name but still treating me as one of the guys doesn't cut it one damn bit.
  •  

Jenna Marie

There is NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO chance my dad is going to be touching my chest. :) Yikes!!!

I downplayed my breasts for the first few visits, but I'm sure it was noticeable; after that, my dad seemed firmly in denial. If he ever snuck peeks, I didn't catch him at it (thank GOD).

My mom was really sweet - she said I'd inherited her curls, and that I looked so much more like her now.
  •  

Sydney_NYC

Quote from: Ms Grace on July 21, 2014, 03:24:52 PM
Hasn't happened yet because he hasn't wanted to meet me. When it does happen, and it will, he might feel weird about it but I won't.

Hugs!!  I'm in the same boat. Since coming out to my father, he hasn't made an contact with me even though I sent him cards, letters and E-MAIL messages. Today is my Birthday and I doubt I'll hear from him. Fortunately my step father who has been more of a father to me anyway has been supportive. Actually everyone else in my family include most of my biological father's side of the family have been incredibly supportive.

The first time I met my step-father as a woman, it wasn't that awkward. He is a decent guy and respects women. I wouldn't call him a feminist, but he treats women as people and not as sex objects. He just gave me a big hug and said I looked great.
Sydney





Born - 1970
Came Out To Self/Wife - Sept-21-2013
Started therapy - Oct-15-2013
Laser and Electrolysis - Oct-24-2013
HRT - Dec-12-2013
Full time - Mar-15-2014
Name change  - June-23-2014
GCS - Nov-2-2017 (Dr Rachel Bluebond-Langner)


  •  

Teela Renee

yeah, the idea is kinda weird to me, my father hasnt seen me since I started transition, just hearing him call me daughter for the first time a week or so ago, blew my mind
RedNeck girls have all the fun 8)
  •  

kariann330

It really wasn't that weird for me the first time. He came up from Tennessee and we had fun shooting, fishing and enjoying a couple jars of shine. There was only one really odd moment when he was helping me adjust my new plate carrier but I think any dad would be kinda nervous adjusting straps that are a half inch away from his daughters boobs lol.

At the end of the weekend he did say that I seem happier and more relaxed now, and joked that I need to stop the hormones because suddenly I was out shooting him lol. But then again I have heard that my family is abnormally supportive
I need a hero to save me now, i need a hero to save my life, a hero will save me just in time!!

"Don't bother running from a sniper, you will just die tired and sweaty"

Longest shot 2500yards, Savage 110BA 338 Lapua magnum, 15X scope, 10X magnifier. Bipod.
  •  

Hikari

I don't really care to see my father again, but I imagine it will be kinda weird. It has always been a bit weird meeting people who had known me from being young as a female.
私は女の子 です!My Blog - Hikari's Transition Log http://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,377.0.html
  •  

Lynne

It was a little weird for me, because I knew it is hard for my parents, but they did not say anything negative.

The first time when I left our house en femme with them seeing me like that was when I went to get my first letter from the psychologist.

When I tried to check if there are any neighbors on the corridor before I left the flat, my mother said that I should not care about what they think or say, it is none of their business.

My father did not even notice that something was different.
I guess he got used to my long hair and he must not have paid a lot of attention to other small details like the high heeled boots, the women's jeans and women's leather jacket and the boobs.

He was only concerned that the jacket may not be warm enough, then my mother asked him to take a better look at me and check what I'm wearing. He did not make an issue out of it. We just went down to the car, got in and drove to the train station.
  •  

allisonsteph

I waited until my father died to transition. My mother has seen pictures of me, but lives on the other side of the country and has not seen me in person yet.
In Ardua Tendit (She attempts difficult things)
  •  

Lara the Lover and the Fighter

I tried to sneak attack my dad.  He's been avoiding me since I transitioned.  It took him like 2 months to accepted my facebook friend request.  He seems to be okay about things as long as he doesn't see me.  So i showed up at his house about a week ago.  Sadly....he had to work late.  sigh....

I'll try again soon!  I'm ready for the most awkward moments in my life! HAH!  I know him and its about the only way I'll pass over that hump with him.
  •