Could you love someone to whom you were not physically attracted?
If so, would you want the person sexually?

I think physical attraction is the starter to relationships, then as they move further on it gets more presonality related.  For the most part, I would have to say I couldn't love someone who I am not a little bit physically attracted to.

Absolutely not--I personally dont think so...as much as personality matters, you dont see someone's personality before you see them...its the outside appearance that attracts you and from there you want to get to know the person...so I dont think its possible at all.

maybe but u gotta be attracted to dat person to.  a relationship dont work if there aint attraction.  I love my buddy J.D. but it aint da same to love him & love the girl I love, u dig?  different kinda love. 

Quote from: Blanche on September 14, 2007, 12:51:50 AM
Absolutely not--I personally dont think so...as much as personality matters, you dont see someone's personality before you see them...its the outside appearance that attracts you and from there you want to get to know the person...so I dont think its possible at all.

That's not true, especially in the today's world of internet relationships. I met my first (and only so far) girlfriend online and felt like we had a strong attraction well before I met her in person. We didn't necessarily call it a 'relationship' at that stage, but I was very, very in love with her personality. She didn't have a camera or any other means of giving me a picture so it was entirely based on our conversations. When we did finally meet, I didn't initially find her all that attractive physically, but she grew on me, and even now, a year after we broke up, I often say to people that she is a very attractive young woman. While I don't think it could necessarily last if you don't find someone in the least bit attractive, it can at least begin.

A relationship "binds" two people and so they try to work things out, and stay together. Sometimes relationships end up in more like a "brother and sister" type relationship meaning that there is no sex but both enjoy being together. And sometimes one or the other can't have sex yet they stay together because they understand, or somehow work it out to make it convenient and also because a relationship involves more than sex.

well, i have heard that to have a good long term relationship with someone, you must be friends. Yet, being friends is just one part of the picture. if you both think that you would be happy with this arrangement, then by all means try it. but if either of you thinks that in 10 or 20 years down the road you'll resent the setup, and wonder what could have happened had you waited for someone else, then don't.

Quote from: Nero on September 13, 2007, 11:58:00 PM
Could you love someone to whom you were not physically attracted?

For me, the two aren't that seperate... I usually SEE someone's personality expressed in how they look. They go together as a package. That's why I always go on about loving a cute smile, or a mischevious expression. So it's not like I dislike "unattractive" people because of their physical traits... but more like my not finding them attractive is a *result* of not "clicking" with them personality-wise.

Said another way, there are a lot of people who I'm attracted to physically, but if I step back and look at them objectively... it's not like they're super-hot or anything. But their personality MAKES them attractive physically to me.

~Kate~

Could you love someone to whom you were not physically attracted?

No, I don't think so. Looks are in the eyes of the beholder though. What you might think is attractive, someone else would think is ugly. I might look at someone and think wow, but my friend here would say ewww, he's gross. I know the media has a concept that they have portrayed and I guess most people are, what they like, in that catagory of attractiveness. I feel it is more personality that looks anyway.
Sheila

QuoteLooks are in the eyes of the beholder though

What if you are blind?

Many things change looks including age. People need much more than looks to love. Lust does not take much.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shallow_Hal

I'm taking the question to have two different meanings.
     First meaning: Yes I can love someone to whom I am not physically attracted as I love my little brother and my little sister but I am not in the least physically attracted to them.
     Second meaning to be in a physical/probable sexualn relationship type love: again yes as to me personality counts then physical attraction can grow. Though in this second type a physical attraction comes about in time.
Rashelle

In my experience, it is possible.  I did it and so did my ex-boyfriend for a very long time (years).  However, I'm afraid to say that such a relationship will not last forever.  One of you will always look outside for that basic human need which is sex.

tink

Quote from: Tink on September 14, 2007, 11:03:27 PM
In my experience, it is possible.  I did it and so did my ex-boyfriend for a very long time (years).  However, I'm afraid to say that such a relationship will not last forever.  One of you will always look outside for that basic human need which is sex.

tink

yea u & ur boyfiriend got it right princes.   dont know what to add.  ur the girl and & he da man.

Quote from: Chris on September 15, 2007, 02:44:02 AM

Quote from: Tink on September 14, 2007, 11:03:27 PM
In my experience, it is possible.  I did it and so did my ex-boyfriend for a very long time (years).  However, I'm afraid to say that such a relationship will not last forever.  One of you will always look outside for that basic human need which is sex.

tink

yea u & ur boyfiriend got it right princes.   dont know what to add.  ur the girl and & he da man.

By the way Chris, I said ex-boyfriend.  But that is not the point here, the point here is that it is possible; perhaps not "eternal" but possible if both parties want to, or at least darn try.

tink

I used to believe looks were central to the equation, but now I believe I could fall for someone's personality alone, particularly if that someone was a woman.

I realy believe that someone can love another person based on nothing but their personality. I think that once you fall in love with their personality that you will start to find things about them physicaly attractive. I think that physical attraction is a bonus. I found my fiance on personality. Then I just fell so in love with him that I could care less on what he looked like. Its strange to say but some of the most unattractive people are some of the nicest people you will ever meet in you life.