Help centers only care that you are going to be safe and if not make sure you are.

No one should be judged of the past being it has been set.

You need to find the help that will help you, now, today and tomorrow out. That is the important part of life.

None of us can change the past but sure puts a huge burden on our live sometimes.

Keep us up to date as needed. Many supportive people here in the forum.
Hugs

I hope you managed to speak to someone. But if not, please don't forget that you're not alone and can speak to any of us any time.

I talked to a crisis counselor and it didn't really help. I've been crying and in a bad depressive episode for over a week. I'm hoping someone can spend time with me soon, I'm just tired as hell...

Hon,
You have said before that you don't want to go to hospital and i have no idea of the USA system. But I want you alive and happy. There is no reason why you cannot be.

First thing is if you feel like self harming or cannot  cope seek the ER services.

Guess what Honey? You have friends here, lots of us. Hell you can come to Australia and the girls will give you a blast.

There is a future and it is good.
Hang in Hon

I need to have friends where I live. I'm so lonely, I never go out anymore and have fun, I lost so many people. I'm not going to the hospital because It's a boring piece of ->-bleeped-<- here. I went twice and I did absolutely nothing, they're a waste of time.They don't even treat us like people but rather prisoners!

Quote from: Riley Skye on August 03, 2014, 11:20:54 AM
I talked to a crisis counselor and it didn't really help. I've been crying and in a bad depressive episode for over a week. I'm hoping someone can spend time with me soon, I'm just tired as hell...

I am sorry you are still in this funk. I know sooo much how it gets.

I wish i could do more other then show you that there are people who care for you and your safety.

I worked through all the crap and i did it with friends i had online and a few with in driving range of where i lived. On top i have a great therapist that understood and worked with me through all the pain.

I was alone, lost my marriage and everything i owned.

I gave up, but for some reason i am here and i will take that.

I feel i am here to keep helping others past the darkness and back into a healthy light and life.

Hugs via a post is best i can do at the moment. Hope it finds its way there.

It's so hard, I've been suffering from mental illness from when I was little and it just keeps attacking me to no end. I'm NOT suicidal but I'm losing my will to live. I thought friends supported me but they turned out to be very abussive towards my mental illness and transition. I'm left with only one friend and I get to see her for maybe a couple times a week for only a few hours. I'm not getting out and having fun. I don't know where to go and being autistic I'm terrified of socializing because I never fit in and get ostracized a lot. I just want this all to stop.... I haven't been nice to myself in almost two years.....

Are you any where close to Stoney brook university?

About 20 minutes, why is that?

Look Riley. I have done drugs. Let me tell you, my freakin' halo is tarnished. I have done just about everything but for a good time only. When you don't care what you do or how much you do then there is a big problem. Self destructive behavior is not a good thing at all. I know. If you ever need to talk Hon, PM me. I have been there and still visit from time to time and now is one of those times. Like I said earlier, we don't need to lose anymore of our friends. Pretty much we are all we got. I can live with that because in  my personal opinion, we are way more than the is populous "cause we know and experience both sides of gender. But we don't need to lose anyone else we love purposely or accidentally in order to kill the pain.

Believe it or not I pray every night for all the people here at Susan's that are having so many problems with GID and so on. But God don't even answer my prayers but I still pray every night regardless. I could care less if God answers what I want, but I still think and hope and pray for the best for everyone else.

Quote from: Riley Skye on August 03, 2014, 04:59:27 PM
About 20 minutes, why is that?

Google it they have lots of resources for the lgbtq community. All types of services.

Maybe a place for you to get out and about?

Quote from: mrs izzy on August 04, 2014, 11:58:18 PM
Google it they have lots of resources for the lgbtq community. All types of services.

Maybe a place for you to get out and about?

I refuse to even try there. They abused me in the emergency room two years ago and when I called several time to get help with my asd the receptionists were cold jerks. I don't like Stony Brook at all

Quote from: Jess42 on August 04, 2014, 11:48:35 PM
Look Riley. I have done drugs. Let me tell you, my freakin' halo is tarnished. I have done just about everything but for a good time only. When you don't care what you do or how much you do then there is a big problem. Self destructive behavior is not a good thing at all. I know. If you ever need to talk Hon, PM me. I have been there and still visit from time to time and now is one of those times. Like I said earlier, we don't need to lose anymore of our friends. Pretty much we are all we got. I can live with that because in  my personal opinion, we are way more than the is populous "cause we know and experience both sides of gender. But we don't need to lose anyone else we love purposely or accidentally in order to kill the pain.

Believe it or not I pray every night for all the people here at Susan's that are having so many problems with GID and so on. But God don't even answer my prayers but I still pray every night regardless. I could care less if God answers what I want, but I still think and hope and pray for the best for everyone else.

And unfortunately I really don't care. I'm being put through the ringer with this terrible mental health system. I've seen a lot of professionals and no one has done anything to help me. I get bad depressive episodes and lash out worse and worse. I'm just not getting better, in fact I'm getting worse, I got no hope and I'm just about to stop trying to seek help

Quote from: Riley Skye on August 05, 2014, 09:11:14 AM
And unfortunately I really don't care. I'm being put through the ringer with this terrible mental health system. I've seen a lot of professionals and no one has done anything to help me. I get bad depressive episodes and lash out worse and worse. I'm just not getting better, in fact I'm getting worse, I got no hope and I'm just about to stop trying to seek help

Well I care. Everyone here cares. Sometimes we can have psychological problems that is rooted in something totally different than what we even think. Or it is in a part of your psyche that you have built indestructable walls around or it is such a guarded secret and we are very protective of it. Let me see if I can describe some of how you feel. You feel like you are going in circles? You feel like if the therapist would just ask the right question you could let it all out but they never seem to ask that question do they? You probably wonder why they can't see the obvious. Does any of that sound familiar?

Never give up hope Riley. There is always hope. Sometimes it is the right combination of meds. Sometimes it is tearing down that industructable wall or at least cracking it enough to let a little bit out at a time.

Quote from: Jess42 on August 05, 2014, 10:00:55 AM
Well I care. Everyone here cares. Sometimes we can have psychological problems that is rooted in something totally different than what we even think. Or it is in a part of your psyche that you have built indestructable walls around or it is such a guarded secret and we are very protective of it. Let me see if I can describe some of how you feel. You feel like you are going in circles? You feel like if the therapist would just ask the right question you could let it all out but they never seem to ask that question do they? You probably wonder why they can't see the obvious. Does any of that sound familiar?

Never give up hope Riley. There is always hope. Sometimes it is the right combination of meds. Sometimes it is tearing down that industructable wall or at least cracking it enough to let a little bit out at a time.

More like no one can understand me and that they all have to be strict hard headed. They don't understand and don't get me the help I need. It's totaly ridiculous!

Edit out strong language.

Quote from: Riley Skye on August 05, 2014, 09:11:14 AM
I refuse to even try there. They abused me in the emergency room two years ago and when I called several time to get help with my asd the receptionists were cold jerks. I don't like Stony Brook at all

And unfortunately I really don't care. I'm being put through the ringer with this terrible mental health system. I've seen a lot of professionals and no one has done anything to help me. I get bad depressive episodes and lash out worse and worse. I'm just not getting better, in fact I'm getting worse, I got no hope and I'm just about to stop trying to seek help

Well i seen they had outside groups in the LGBTQ community and i though i would give you the information. Nothing more or less.

You have to want to help yourself if you want others to help you.

I spent 2 times in my local mental floor of the hospital. First time it was just a vacation being no one had a idea of that to do. But the second time i got the most help. Staff changes on rotation and it was a different group of doctors and nurses.

I wish you the best and hope you can get out of this i can not and start i will work on getting some type of help.

Your closed in room is not the answer. Out in the world is where the help lies.

Hugs and truly wish i had more to offer on the help side.

We all here care and try and give you tools to help. You need to pick up the tools to try and fix things.

Quote from: Riley Skye on August 05, 2014, 10:19:42 AM
More like no one can understand me and that they all have to be strict hard headed. They don't understand and don't get me the help I need. It's totaly ridiculous!

Yeah it gets that way sometimes. I know it's none of my business but what are the be so strict about if you want to say?

Don't forget too you are on HRT and that can reek havoc like going through puberty again.

You have to try to make them understand. I know how hard it is because I would talk about any and everything except the thing that was causing me the most problems. It took quite a while to let that part out because I hid it so good and wasn't wanting to share it with anyone else. When I finally did, therapy started being way more productive. With therapy we have to be extremely honest especially with ourselves. I had one therapist that said she couldn't even help me anymore and gave up on me. That hurt, but I didn't give up on myself and the next therapist wouldn't give up on me and eventually between him and the psychiatrist coaxed it out of me. This took over a year.

Edit quote for language