Ok after my short 2 month romance I decided to give up on men. Well my protest lasted about 3 months and I just couldn't stand being alone plus now that I had a taste of intimacy again I longed for it more than ever.

I decided to go back on a dating site, I don't list that I am TG. I have had many offers to meet but have only communicate so far. I decided to take the plunge and meet a man that kept on messaging me, even after not communicating for over a month. He lived 90 miles away but came here to meet for our date. The date went really well, he wasn't exactly my type for looks, interests and attitude, but definitely was not one to run away from either. He looked almost identical to the pics I seen prior (a good thing, in most cases) hoping the same was for me.

We had a nice meal at a very nice restaurant in town, during the meal we had some decent conversations. After we were done he was still interested in me enough that he wanted to continue the date (I had a different experience one time) I suggested a couple of places where there was live music. We ended up going to 3 different places, at one time he even held my hand while we walked around town. I told him I needed to be home by 12 otherwise I would turn into a pumpkin, so we ended the date early. The whole night he was a total gentleman!

When he brought me back to my car where I left it at the restaurant he even gave me a little kiss. I'm not one for any type of affection on a first date but I felt very comfortable, it also didn't help that I had 3 drinks and was feeling a bit tipsy! At that point I was telling myself that it was a successful date and one I enjoyed, I was willing to see what more could come out of this. I asked him as he left to text me when he got home, so  I know he made it home safe. He texted me an hour and a half later stating he made it home safe and had a good time. That was essentially all he said. I quickly got the feeling that he wasn't impressed. But this was the first time I got this impression.

I started to feel even more certain of his lack of desire for me the next day when I didn't here a word from him. I gave him another day and then texted him telling him I had a good time but understand if nothing more comes out of it....things happen, no big deal.  He never responded ever!!

Its been a couple of weeks now and its bothering me, I don't know what to think of this, did I rush to judgment to early or was it something else. He was a gentleman the whole night and not once did I think he wanted just sex. I have been racking my brain as to what to think. I just don't get it! I never did text him back again since I don't want to look needy, but I sure would like to know what went wrong! It was one of the best dates I ever went on!

What happened!! Anyone have any ideas???

I guess I should just take the advice of a coworker and be happy that I got a free meal, drinks and a night of fun. That's not what I wanted though

There are tons of possibilities Shelly. They range from just playing the field to going back to a wife and kids. You will never know so just move on and remember how well you were treated. I am sure it is not you. Just please don't give up! 

Quote from: Jessica Merriman on August 04, 2014, 05:36:51 PM
There are tons of possibilities Shelly. They range from just playing the field to going back to a wife and kids. You will never know so just move on and remember how well you were treated. I am sure it is not you. Just please don't give up! 

I can't help I haven't dated in a long time, but I would of tried to get a movie out of it.

Hi Shelly,
And when you know it, what more ?
And who is the most important for you ? (my idea is that is you)
All of time is the past (recent or not) ; so, live in the present and a little in the near future.
Why do you want that the problem is you ?
Probalby the reason is because there is a better man for you.
Take care of yourself and I wish you the best.
Hannah

Shelly

I would say as your co worker said, it was a night out on a date.

Least you said you enjoy the night and that is a plus.

Many men are after a date and a romp in the sack then i will call you. If he truly was after a relationship he would have text or called you back.

At least you protected you heart in not giving more the first date then.

Move forward and the next could be really the one that sweeps you off your feet.

Hugs

/\ Words of wisdom Shelly!! 

If you say his interests and attitude didn't really suit you perhaps he felt the same way and is choosing to invest his time and feelings with someone who meshes with him more. If that's the case then no harm no foul just enjoy the memories of that evening and move on yourself.
If he should message you back after a week or so then he is probably playing that dating game crap and hoping that you will become more interested in him due to the lack of contact.
Either way if you enjoyed the date take it as a positive and don't over think the results.

Quote from: mrs izzy on August 04, 2014, 06:16:59 PM
Shelly

I would say as your co worker said, it was a night out on a date.

Least you said you enjoy the night and that is a plus.

Many men are after a date and a romp in the sack then i will call you. If he truly was after a relationship he would have text or called you back.

At least you protected you heart in not giving more the first date then.

Move forward and the next could be really the one that sweeps you off your feet.

Hugs

That's the thing, I never got the impression that sex is what he wanted. It was quite invigorating for a change! I also thought he was truly interested in getting to know me better. Its just so weird. I thought I did move forward but I've been having some bad days and I've been thinking about more.

I'm new to all this dating stuff but thought I was starting to get use to it since I've been on 5 or more now...but only in the past year or so. I never dated much in my prior life and I definitely never went out on dates with men.

I guess I just have to check off this type on my list. I was getting use to men falling head over heals for me after the first date LOL . No, but I did have 3 that became fairly attached after the first date....and one that I was very fond over....until I had to tell him my past

Quote from: White Rabbit on August 04, 2014, 07:08:22 PM
If you say his interests and attitude didn't really suit you perhaps he felt the same way and is choosing to invest his time and feelings with someone who meshes with him more. If that's the case then no harm no foul just enjoy the memories of that evening and move on yourself.
If he should message you back after a week or so then he is probably playing that dating game crap and hoping that you will become more interested in him due to the lack of contact.
Either way if you enjoyed the date take it as a positive and don't over think the results.

Oh crap....overthinking is the only thing I am good at though!!

Then over think what you will do the next time you go out on a date. This guy may not have been the right one for you and who knows the next 3 or 4 might not be either. Use each date to grow and have fun with them, sooner or later you will find someone.

Though I am probably the last person who should be giving relationship advice. 

Let me put it this way: my bf of 3 years has never taken me to a nice restaurant. I'm jealous.