Quote from: Kristina77 on July 10, 2014, 03:30:26 PM
Not sure if this goes to legal matters or what, but here goes!  Mods move if necessary.

Short Version (Cuz I tend to talk too much)
I never told my work I was transitioning, because it's a very conservative atmosphere.  I planned on just leaving but things didn't work out that way financially.  I have gotten harassment / awkwardness even trying to present as that 'old' male self at work.  Things hit a breaking point this month and I had my hours cut to almost nothing, while a couple months ago we had 3 new employees hired that do the exact same thing I do.  They have not let me go because I think they know that would be considered discrimination and I could sue..  What should I do? Could I still sue?  I have some money in the bank but not enough to last me for too long plus I'm right in the middle of the name change process  I look female and am addressed as such even when trying to present as male for legal matters.

Long Version (Mostly to get my feelings out / therapeutic):
So just a little bit of background I began my HRT at the tail end of last october / early novemeber.  I didn't come out to my work at that point for a variety of reasons, but the primary being that many fundamentalist Christians (and a couple Muslims) work there, and I could pick out at least 3 employees that would make my life a living hell if I did.  Things were fine for awhile, because I was at work so often the gradual changes were easy not to see if someone sees you every day.  I was getting bonuses & overtime through the end of last year (December).

But things started to change as the changes to my appearance became more obvious.  I got away with it for awhile because my appearance was already pretty androgynous, (I was gendered female several times before HRT) and I started growing my hair out a couple years prior so I already dealt with a huge amount of harassment just because of that. (Yes, even though I tied it back... it's THAT conservative of a work environment).  But as I mentioned things starting hitting a tipping point in Jan / Feb.  That's when the hormones starting hitting me really hard.  That's when I started passing 100% (I haven't been addressed as 'male' no matter how i 'present' since the first week of feburary... even when I attended court with my old male ID).

I would wear an open jacket to cover them, but this became increasingly less an option when it started to get hot (I'm in SoCal, weather gets above 90-100 starting in April sometimes).  Nevertheless I suffered through it anyways, and I began to bind on really hot days (I had no other choice, I hit a B cup in May).  That's when I started to be told to 'stay home' when work was slow... even though 3 other employees were hired in this time period that do the exact same thing as I do... and they were all working full time.

So, it's been very awkward for me to go to work with this thick jacket on and get addressed as 'he' then leave for lunch and get the flirts from guys... but I've lived with it because I had to (cuz money).  Though even at work I was referred to as 'her' by employees that didn't know me previously.  I repeat this point often just because I have not been directly confronted about the transistion... only subtle harassment / mistreatment and snide comments here and there. Fast forward to this week.. and I was basically told not to come in at all until they tell me to.   Sadly, the HR lady is out on vacation until Monday 7/14, so I can't file an unemployment claim to cover my basic needs just yet.  I'm contemplating suing for a discrimination suit.  Should I go through with it?  Does anyone else have experience in this area?

I suppose I could always just file for unemployment, cut my losses and move on... but it really does feel like I'm being discriminated against- especially when I've tried to keep things on a good term with them and not rock the boat by insisting they address me by my correct name and by essentially binding & crossdressing everyday just to accomodate certain people who would give me hell.

If you want to get their attention threaten to go public on face book or the internet.  One of the things companies fear most these days is being branded as bigoted.  A lot of damage can be done to a company via the internet and they know it.

Quote from: Amy1988 on August 08, 2014, 11:23:28 AM
If you want to get their attention threaten to go public on face book or the internet.  One of the things companies fear most these days is being branded as bigoted.  A lot of damage can be done to a company via the internet and they know it.

I don't think it's wise to burn bridges like that.  After all, you may need a good reference from them one day and you don't want a reputation for going nuclear.

Quote from: Amy1988 on August 08, 2014, 11:23:28 AM
If you want to get their attention threaten to go public on The face book or the internet.  One of the things companies fear most these days is being branded as bigoted.  A lot of damage can be done to a company via the internet and they know it.

Not what I would call good advice to anyone.

This advice I feel would be the last resort after all communication and legal avenues have been exhausted.

Going this route could bring libel suits against you.

So stay with legal means.

Quote from: Jill F on August 08, 2014, 02:12:40 PM
I don't think it's wise to burn bridges like that.  After all, you may need a good reference from them one day and you don't want a reputation for going nuclear.

I don't think she is going to get a nice reference out those people no matter what. 

Wow haven't checked this thread in awhile!

Yeah, I'm not going to go public because I'm trying my absolute best to set things up for deep stealth next year... I know there are people that disagree with me, but I don't want to be openly trans... mainly because my experience has been ppl treat me like a friggen princess but the second they found out I'm trans they treat me like crap I'd rather not deal with that.

If anyone wants an update, I've seen in boss emails that even other companies were asking for someone to do some work for them from home or our office location... and the boss didn't give my info even though I've been begging him for hours... he gave the info of 2 other workers that have long since left to other jobs.. and HAVE other full time jobs So yeah, I'm saving all the emails I have, saving them as proof of wrongful discrimination.

I'm currently getting unemployment and have gotten called in for a few things here and there.  When I do go in it's intensely awkward, and I've gotten full verbal harassment (employees referring to me by male name but in a very feminine 'stereotypical gay male' accent).  The statue of limitations on wrongful termination is 6 months, so I will be filing a suit.  I've already gotten into contact with Lambda legal, hopefully I can get some sort of free / cheap advocate lawyer to take my case. 

I have to move back in with my mom several hours away due to the hour cut, so this week I'm going to come out and say in writing i'm leaving and make sure that all my bosses know I'm transitioning (I was told this was a requirement to establish a case). I also plan in the letter to mention the intolerable working conditions that have included verbal harassment, people being hired to replace me, setting me up to fail, etc... Other employees get away things on a regular basis that I get yelled at for.  The harassment is becoming more and more transparent everday I stay there.

I'll let everyone know how it goes!  Thanks for the support these last two months have been absolute hell for me here's hoping there's justice in the end.

Sounds like you may have a case. You may not need a free lawyer from the way it sounds. Good Luck and keep us up to date.

I made an edit at the end of the OP for everyone, but suffice to say I wrote to them about it in an email so it'd be on record and they offered me a settlement.  It wasn't as much as I'd have liked but I really desperately need money right now and it was enough to be able to help out with transition stuff so I just took it.  Thanks everyone for your help!