First of all, the psychologists I see are no good. I have said this many times to my family, and they will not listen. All the psychologists tell me I am just going through a phase. I think I need a gender psychologist, but my parents are unwilling at the moment to let me see one. They feel it is unnecessary, and I have all the support I need...a waste of money. I have very little support, if at all...alot of it could even be harmful.

I have told my parents that I need some freedom. I need someone I can TRUST, but again, they wont listen. They LOVE my current psychologist, who I cannot connect to. I think she is terrible.

I don't know what to do. I can't pay for any counseling, I have tried hotlines, but no one has ever picked up. I am completely stuck.




-Merrick

Sorry you are having such problems with your psychologist, it is hard when you don't feel comfortable with the person who is supposed to be helping you.

I guess all you can do is keep trying to talk with your parents, maybe one of these times they will listen.

Sarah L.

yeah, that's a tough situation.
You got me stumped here.  Are there any free support groups near you?

I don't know where you live, but if you lived in Minneapolis, I would send you to District 202.  That's the local program for LGBTQ youth.  It's a place to hang and meet people and to get information.  Maybe there's something like that near where you live.

You could try telling your psychologists that you would like them to refer you to someone else with more experience in gender related issues as they are not helping you. As a professional they really should accept this.

You need to find someone to be on your side. Do you have a school councillor that you can see? Another adult family member you can talk to?

Lisbeth and Rebis have a good idea. See if there is a local LGBT support group that you can get in touch with for help.

Don't despair Merrick, if you keep asking for help eventually someone will listen.

This is a tough situation to be in. I know from  experiance most counselers are not trained for gender issues. You need to find a real gender counseler. I wish you  luck in your endevor.



Linda Ann

I think they would be better than nothing. I mentioned counsellor as they have very different training to a psychologist and should at least be able to help you work through your own issues no matter what they are. Even if they don't have experience with gender issues, I think if Merrick can get someone like that on his side then it can only be good for him.

Quote from: InBetween (Merrick-Scott) on September 19, 2007, 06:54:12 PM
First of all, the psychologists I see are no good. I have said this many times to my family, and they will not listen. All the psychologists tell me I am just going through a phase. I think I need a gender psychologist, but my parents are unwilling at the moment to let me see one. They feel it is unnecessary, and I have all the support I need...a waste of money. I have very little support, if at all...alot of it could even be harmful.

I have told my parents that I need some freedom. I need someone I can TRUST, but again, they wont listen. They LOVE my current psychologist, who I cannot connect to. I think she is terrible.

I don't know what to do. I can't pay for any counseling, I have tried hotlines, but no one has ever picked up. I am completely stuck.

-Merrick

Hi Scott,

i think you are right, it would be good for you to see a gender therapist.

but don't panic!

if you find that you really are trans, you should be extremely glad that you are reaching such an understanding about yourself at such a young age. this is one thing that you can really afford to be patient about.

it seems to me that there are an awful lot of things that need to be thought out in regards to transitioning. it's not an overnight process. it's a long journey, and it has to start with you knowing a little something about yourself.

there are a lot of resource pages on this site, regarding hormones, etc., etc. i'm not a therapist, but it think it is safe to say that the resource pages here are a very good starting point. i read them for weeks before calling a gender therapist. in addition, there are lots of really cool FTM's and MTF's at Susan's who will give you lots of support.

so, allow yourself to come out of crisis mode, because you have a lot thinking to do, and you wouldn't want to be all upset while you're doing that.

-ell

If you live near a major city contact a GLBT clinic.  Most have clinics with at least one gender specialist that work on a very generous sliding scale. 

Ell has really given some sound advice here.  I have just started this journey also.  Nobody listened to me as a youngster.  I read over alot of the information on this site prior to scheduleing my first appointment, which I ended up missing because I got lost.  Just hang in there and things will fall into place, as Ell said "You have alot to think about" and it is not a good idea to do it in panic mode.  Just hang in there. 

Okay, so I think I finally got through to them by some miracle. We will be seeing about a gender identity therapist.



-Merrick-Scott

Hey, two weeks on,

Hows it going? Did you progress any further in getting a gender therapist?

Not really. I have been communicating through email with a therapist in my area, but she isn't sure that she can help me...I may go for another person...she may refer me.

That's about as far as I have gotten.



-Merrick

Merrick, where are you located? There may very well be someone here who can refer you to a good person in your area.