Hi. I haven't started T. I have it. But my family has somewhat "freaked" out about things. My question is geared towards those who have been on T for a long time. I'm curious what the effects are long-term. I know the basic effects as given to me by my doctor, but I do want to get an idea what might happen 20, 30, or 40 years out. Even if you have been on T for a short, time, your response would be helpful. If anyone knows about some sort of a medical study on this, that would also be helpful as well.

Thank you in advance to anyone who takes the time to read this or reply.

I don't know too many people who have been on testosterone for 20+ years, which does concern me sometimes. However, it's more likely that they're stealth (many of us are) as opposed to nonexistent. The few I do know of are in excellent health.

This might help: http://www.ftmguide.org/ttherapybasics.html.

I don't know of any active members here who are twenty years on T. You might not get any responses at all from someone in that situation.

Thank you both for the replies. Well, if anyone has been on it 5 years or 10, or even less. I'm just trying to get an idea of the overall effect. Thank you very much.

I'm not quite sure what you are looking for. I'm over five years in, and I had all of the changes in the Hudson's list (except "cessation of menses," since I had already stopped, and effects to chest tissue, since I am post-top-surgery). I am in good health apart from non-trans-related injuries, one of which prevents me from exercising and which has caused some weight gain.

I still have issues with impulse control, and I get frustrated/angry more quickly and have trouble calming down. I suspect that some of that comes from keeping my emotions so tightly in check for so many years--the combined effects of being on T and finally allowing myself to emote fully are a tough combination. On the other hand, I don't have to struggle not to cry when I get mad. However, sometimes, when I am alone, I would like to be able to cry because I get torqued up and need to let it go; it's especially hard to release emotional energy when I can't exercise. But I much prefer this state of affairs to the way things were.

I do have to be careful at times lest my passion overwhelm other people. I don't spend much time with women in my personal life, but I do work with them and live in a world with women. So on a few occasions, I have become quite emphatic about something and have intimidated the woman I was talking to. But now I know about this and work to prevent it.

I look like a man, sound like a man, smell like a man, behave like a man. Because of my life experiences, I'm probably a little more empathetic than most, and I'm definitely more cerebral than most because, well, I'm a nerd. But for all intents and purposes, I am a perfectly normal middle-aged man. A couple of inches shorter than most--in more ways than one--and I do have bottom dysphoria on a daily basis. But the rest of the world sees just a regular guy.

Thank you Arch. I was so ready to start and then some very dear family members are distancing themselves so I am feeling quite alone and wanting to start and wanting to get as much information I can before I do. I experience dysphoria every day. I dress as my gender (male) but am not fully out nor accepted. I am out in certain environments, and in others, like family, it has been very difficult. I am going through a lot of changes and don't know if I can handle losing my family. At the same time, I don't want to lose myself and continue down a dark road. So I am just trying to hear other's experiences with T, and everything. I wish there was a magic pill to make it all better, meaning, make my outsides match my insides, but there isn't. I don't know why I let my family's opinion affect me so much. Things are very difficult right now and I simply am trying to gage my future. That's all. Thank you Arch and Declan, for your replies.

Well, I didn't have any family to lose, and my friends were all either trans or gay or university people--no losses there. But my relationship ended. That's fairly typical.

The fallout was scary as heck, but I got through it. I still have some personal issues to work on in therapy (for example, I'm procrastinating on some work right now), but I rent a house I like, drive a good used car that I bought with my own money a few months ago, and finally landed a stable job with trans-friendly health insurance. The past six years have been tough, but I got through them. And I did it without the help of family.

I think that not having family in the picture was an advantage because I didn't have to worry about losing people. But I worried about everything else under the sun. And you know what? Most of that worry was just a waste of time and energy and sanity. The bad things I imagined either didn't come to pass or weren't nearly as awful as I expected. And now I'm kind of proud that I got through it all.

I had emotional support from a couple of support groups, a few friends, Susan's Place, and my therapist, but no family or significant other. Lots of other people here have had family members and lost them, and those folks are still going strong and living their lives on their own terms. Many times, these folks have the support of at least a part of the family. Frequently, some of their family members just need time. We're all in different situations. But we get support from many other people.

You have to recognize that you might indeed lose some family members, at least temporarily. But you can get through even if your family does not support you. Just take one step at a time, make sure that you have other people supporting you, and think carefully about any big decisions you make. I made the decisions I needed to make so that I could stay alive and become relatively happy. Five years down the road, despite my losses, I can't imagine living any other way.

Thanks for sharing, Arch. This is a very scary process, and at the same time, I know it is the right one. I was so happy and feeling so great as I became closer and closer to starting hormones. Then I told my dad and everything shifted. Those who supported me took my dad's side. Some friends and some family. My dad said he couldn't deny that was who I was (there were signs from when I was very little) but that he did not have a son and he basically said goodbye. That's only part of it. I hope that this gets easier. Many other things have happened in these last few weeks that have made life very difficult. It is good to know that people get through it. I know who I am. That's not in question. It's how bold can I be and still stay afloat. There are a lot of other factors at play. I have free medical insurance, including surgeries and hormones, so that is not the issue. It's being able to be in society when those I love aren't there with me. Maybe they will come around. Maybe they won't. Maybe there is a group I could join. I am a working student. I was just going back to school as I wanted to be a veterinarian (rather than do what my other degrees allow me to do). I don't want to give that up, and it's kind of feeling like I might need to. Thank you for sharing and your support. It is profoundly appreciated.