Hi

I'm not yet on T I have had top surgery and pass 99% of the time. However I work with children and every now and then I get asked the dreaded question are you a boy or a girl? How do you handle this? What's the best reply? Any advice would be appreciated.

Jay

if its the kids asking, I would say "does it matter"
most of them will forget within 3 minutes anyway

I'm a boy, so I would tell them I'm a boy....tis just a simple question and they don't need your life story. Or you can mess with them and say you're a kangaroo or something to change the subject. OR just answer with "yes" xD that always confuses them

I work with preschool aged kids. I just say "what do you think?" It's always funny because they call me 'nii-chan' or 'ni-ni' which is big brother, but the 4 year olds will ask. They always say "big brother is big brother so... Boy?"

Quote from: Ayden on August 22, 2014, 05:39:43 AM
I work with preschool aged kids. I just say "what do you think?" It's always funny because they call me 'nii-chan' or 'ni-ni' which is big brother, but the 4 year olds will ask. They always say "big brother is big brother so... Boy?"

I love it when kids ask this when I am out somewhere.  I always say the same above, "Well, what do you think?"  The parents are horrified, but I love when kids (usually around age 4 will ask this question).  Several years ago one said, "Well, you have a boy watch and boy shoes, so you must be a boy".  I said, "Correct"!

In thinking about it, maybe I should have said, no I am a girl, just to expand his thinking on gender, but it was more important to me to make him smile and feel good about himself.

I am not on T, many/most think I am male (unless I say more than a few sentences).

I usually give the does it matter answer to kids. I know my sister gets weird about the subject since my 3 year old niece has started asking that question more frequently as of late. But like Nicole said, they will most likely forget within minutes.

I'm a boy to friends and a girl to the family.

I feel that when kids ask it, they're just curious but like the others said it doesn't matter anyways to them, they'll forget it in a couple minutes.. lol.  There was this little girl I befriended while working, I think she was like three years old.. She told me she saw a boy wearing the shirt and watch that I was wearing and said they were boy clothes and my so why was I wearing them? ((I'm not out to anyone, pre-everything.)) I just told her that anyone can wear the shirt because it's a cool shirt (it had a spiderman logo on it.. one of my favorite shirts) and same went for my watch and she just shrugged and nodded in a some-what agreeing way and we just moved on from that quickly.

I don't mind when kids ask questions, but I absolutely despise the teenagers or older than that who snicker and whisper and point at me as soon as I walk into an area, acting as if I don't hear them. Oh the irony, considering I'm a young person myself..

I don't recall a time when someone has asked me if I'm male or female since I came out. With little kids, I'd ask them what they thought, and with older people, I'd tell them I'm a boy. I've been called "sir" on many occasions, all of which I get quite happy about. When (most of) my friends' friends ask them, they refer to me as a boy, or introduce me as Reuben, instead of Sam.

My 6 year old nephew always asks me this and I reply with one of these answers:

A. "What do you think I am?""

B. "Yes"

C. "I'm a broom."

Typically I usually stick with A. and his response changes each time. 

I like "What do you think?" for young kids. It's a good standard answer for a lot of things. If I were asked political questions, I'd ask what they thought about them. (That's for older kids.) If you are  "out" as male, you can say a boy, but a lot of times work situations are complicated.

--Jay

One time before I transitioned a little girl asked me if I was a mommy or a daddy. I said I don't have kids. She was so confused. LOL.

I remember being asked (pre T) if I was a boy or a girl by a little girl and when I told her that I was a boy, he kept repeating the same question and looked confused... I guess I should go with 'I am actually an alien in human form" if I come across this situation again.

Thanks for the replies, I should have added I'm not "out" as male at work which makes it very difficult!