When people say lets take a picture I just don't get why they would want to do that and then I get very stressed out by the situation and people make a big deal when I don't want to be in the photo and I really just look bad , uncomfortable and forced to do it and I end up messing up the photo and I just can't truly smile i'm so nervous around people and the situation and insecure about my looks.

When i'm out I avoid reflective objects and when i'm in the bathroom I look at myself in the mirror for along time hours and can't connect with the image reflection I see. I can't even tell if i'm attractive because i'm just not sure of anything.

My mom loves to tell people about how the photographer at her wedding "couldn't even manage" to get a photo of me. If I had wanted my photo taken I would have made myself available. If I didn't care if my photo was taken candidly I wouldn't have eluded the photographer on purpose.

I've also had to deal with the pressure of being in a photo, and then being harped on for refusing. What the hell? I mean, I understand wanting to capture a memory, but don't bully someone into it. And now, today, I'm a photographer.