Hello everybody I'm Melissa Ann,

I've been lurking on this site now for about a month. I thought it would be about time to introduce myself. Over the past year and through years of counseling, I've come to the realization that I'm transgender MTF. A little about myself I am 50 years old currently divorced with SO. I have two wonderful children.

I've known for a long time that I was different than other boys. I would rather join the girls in their play instead of the boys. I have always had more girls as friends than boys. And always enjoyed female attire. I've always been emotional this combined with my girly activities led to quite a hard childhood. I was physically, sexually and emotionally abused through high school by my parents. By their words "boys don't cry and play with girl things". So I was forced to dress like a girl (although I liked it) I didn't want to be sent the school that way. Where I was obviously beat up.

If it is an obvious by now I will let you know that my parents are no longer in my life nor are my siblings. Of course the way I was treated has affected my life in many different ways. I've been truly scared to admit who I really am, and repress those feelings till I no longer can.

It is high time that I start my transition and look forward to this new stage of my life. After years of therapy I now understand who I am and what I want. I found Susan's place by looking for support for transgender people. From what I've seen so far on this site I know I have come to the right place. I look so very much forward to seeing you in chatting with all the other girls out there.
Melissa Ann

I know the introduction forum is slow, but how am I first to reply?

Anyways, welcome to Susan's!

iiMTF

Very nice to hear that you've come to terms with yourself. I have been lurking around for a grand total of 2 days myself, and I see nothing but active moderators and supportive peers; You have come to a good place.

If you don't mind my asking, have you disclosed this to your children? If so, how are they taking it, and if not, how do you think they will take it and how do you intend to deliver?

~Audrey

Quote from: iiMTF on August 31, 2014, 11:05:04 PM
I know the introduction forum is slow, but how am I first to reply?

Remember sweetie it is a holiday weekend in the states. 

A big warm welcome to the family Melissa! I started transition at age 47 myself. Let me tell you it has been wonderful. Just imagine, we are both starting a new life which is something many never get to experience. I am sure you will be totally amazed by all the new things to experience, feel and how free and relaxed you will be. One big thing we older transitioners have advantage wise is life experience that makes this so much easier. We have learned how to interact with others, solve complex problems and usually have great self esteem to be successful. I am so glad you found us and I hope we can help with your journey. Be sure to tell us the good AND bad and we will be there for you. This is one amazing place and you are now a part of it. 

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Quote from: Jessica Merriman on August 31, 2014, 11:15:19 PM
Remember sweetie it is a holiday weekend in the states. 

Oh, right, sorry forgot. To me it's just an extra day off school lol.

MelissaAnn
Welcome to Susan's family 
Never to late to seek out support. There is more here then one could use in a life time, well maybe not but you get the jest. There are many of us older in transition on the site. Sometime i feel we need our own over 40 group listing LOL. Anyway there is always someone around to help answer a question so feel free to type it out.

Safe passage on your path, popcorn?

Izzy

@iiMTF

YES. ALL OF MY YES.

No calculus or engineering class today!

You make me feel tiny. I've never heard of engineering class and I can't even take calculus for years.

Thank you everyone for the welcome,
right now my children do not know about me being transgender. Although I do think they have their suspicions after I started let my hair grow long and pierced my ears. I am working with my therapist on a way to tell them. Although I am scared to death about telling them, it's not so much them knowing who I am as it is I'm afraid of losing them. Although my ex and I did raise them to be accepting of all others, it still scares me. If anybody has any suggestions on how to handle coming out to them, I'd love to hear from you.
Hugs and kisses,
Melissa Ann

Welcome to Susan's, MelissaAnn. Self acceptance does lead to self discovery. I' m happy that you have accepted who you really are. I pray that your children will understand this.

Hi Melissa! Kids are amazingly resilient and accepting. Mine are teens now (boy 15 1/2, daughter 16 1/2). My son accepted me unconditionally and has been wonderful with me being full time and lives with me still. I have been full time for 9 months now and the time has flown by. My son is so funny and when I get on to him about his room or something he responds with "chill woman" as he grins. My daughter on the other hand is a religious zealot in the Southern Baptist Convention. The Pastor in his love and friendship has her convinced I am an evil and hideous pervert of the worse kind. She lives with her mother and has changed her name to her mothers maiden name. My wife and I separated long before due to financial reasons and she just found out about my new status as a woman. Anyway, most of my son's friends have accepted me as well due to his acceptance and being fine with it. My nieces and nephews are good with it as well. Kids just don't have the biases or discrimination  that grown ups do and things do not seem to shake them as bad. 

Quote from: Jessica Merriman on September 01, 2014, 03:37:03 PM
Kids just don't have the biases or discrimination  that grown ups do and things do not seem to shake them as bad. 

Hehe... Kid Nation is a wonderful place

Quote from: Jessica Merriman on September 01, 2014, 03:37:03 PM
I have been full time for 9 months now and the time has flown by.

9 months already! Time has flown by.


Kids really do take it well.

Quote from: LordKAT on September 01, 2014, 04:00:41 PM
9 months already! Time has flown by.

I know right? I looked at the calendar and could not believe it myself! 9 Months!!!! Seems like only yesterday I was a scared, lonely and confused person making my first post here. It was one year ago this month!!  OMG!! 

Congrats on one year! (and 9 months on full time!)

Quote from: iiMTF on September 01, 2014, 04:22:40 PM
Congrats on one year! (and 9 months on full time!)

Thanks sweetie!