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Going out in public......

Started by Jasriella, September 01, 2014, 11:09:06 AM

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Jasriella

I'm absolutely terrified right now. My mom and sister are coming to pick me up for a girls day out and I've never been in public like this. It's going to happen, and I made as best an attempt I could at makeup but I swear it's not enough. I'm feeling like having a panic attack or something I've never been this scared.

It's gotta happen at some point though. Might as well do it with family that's doing this for me....... If I live I'll let y'all know how it went.
"Bravery is the capacity to perform properly when scared half to death.



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Elis

Just be confident and not give an f what other people think, works for me when I dress in guy mode. Good luck  :)
They/them pronouns preferred.



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Melizza

Good luck! you will have a lot of fun! What an exciting day for you!!!

As Elis said, be confident and just act like you really are, people will not even look twice if they see a confident gal!

Let's us know how it goes thru :) !
HRT - January 1, 2012
Full Time - April 2012
BA - May 2013
GRS - August 2014

http://www.mitransicion.com
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HeatherR

Trick is not overdoing it... Makeup, clothes, any of it... The more bold, the more you stand out, good or bad. 
The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.  ~Ralph Blum~



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mrs izzy

As everyone said is great tips.

Just be Jasriella and enjoy the fact your mom and sister are helping you move forward.

We all are just ourselves and confidence in who we are is the key to public presentation.

Breathe and just enjoy. Miss my girls day out. GRRRR!
Mrs. Izzy
Trans lifeline US 877-565-8860 CAD 877-330-6366 http://www.translifeline.org/
"Those who matter will never judge, this is my given path to walk in life and you have no right to judge"

I used to be grounded but now I can fly.
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awilliams1701

My first time out I picked something more subtle. A guy's shirt and a denim skirt that could almost pass for shorts. In my head most people would pass me as wearing shorts. This was a HUGE help. I wore it as if it was shorts. No one gave me a hard time. Everyone treated me like normal. I had one teenager that got in my face with a camera and called me a walmart freak. It hurt a little especially since everyone here shops at walmart due to its proximity. However the complete disrespect for my personal space was what really bothered me. In the end it blew over and I haven't had any problems since.

Eventually I started going for more obvious clothes. I had no issues. Everyone still treated me the same. I've had more trouble with a sister of mine who I haven't even seen in person since before I came out to even myself.
Ashley
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Mark3

Probably the first few minutes might be uncomfortable, as in any new experience, but after that just relax and enjoy yourself..
I hope everything goes great, and you have a wonderful Girls Day..!!  :)
"The soul is beyond male and female as it is beyond life and death."
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Rachel

Good luck and I hope you have a wonderful day.
HRT  5-28-2013
FT   11-13-2015
FFS   9-16-2016 -Spiegel
GCS 11-15-2016 - McGinn
Hair Grafts 3-20-2017 - Cooley
Voice therapy start 3-2017 - Reene Blaker
Labiaplasty 5-15-2017 - McGinn
BA 7-12-2017 - McGinn
Hair grafts 9-25-2017 Dr.Cooley
Sataloff Cricothyroid subluxation and trachea shave12-11-2017
Dr. McGinn labiaplasty, hood repair, scar removal, graph repair and bottom of  vagina finished. urethra repositioned. 4-4-2018
Dr. Sataloff Glottoplasty 5-14-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal in office procedure 10-22-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal revision 2 4-3-2019 Bottom of vagina closed off, fat injected into the labia and urethra repositioned.
Dr. Thomas in 2020 FEMLAR
  • skype:Rachel?call
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Boo Stew

Own it. Just own it. I was nervous the first few times I dressed in public but then all of a sudden I just stopped registering other people on my radar and I instead focused my attention on the friends I was with, my phone, the world around me and suddenly that panic was gone. It's just clothes. It's just hair. It's just makeup. You're just a homosapien. You'll do awesome! And it sounds like you have an awesome support team. Good luck!!
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Juliett

I would die to have a mother and sister.
correlation /= causation
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Stochastic

You are going to have so much fun!!! Please provide an update on your outing.

You will find that most people are too involved with their lives to pay that much attention to their surroundings. It is stressful at first but it gets easier each time you go out. Confidence will come over time. Congrats.
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bluebirdx88

Confidence! Just try to keep calm and take a few deep breaths if you need them... Let your sis know how you're feeling if it makes you feel any safer. You have to keep a positive mindset and just keep relaxed... What most people will notice is confidence, (Trust me.. confidence does a LOT more than 40 pounds of make-up can...) If you think you hear people commenting or looking funny, remember half the time it's really your mind playing tricks on you, that or they really aren't worth the attention. If you think you're a star, people will see you as a star ;)

Took me a long time to realize this... So yep, chin up and smile, you can do it! :)

PS: The captcha insists violets are blue... But I could swear they are purple, hehe..


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Jasriella

It was really rough and nerve racking to begin with especially when I started to go look at shoes. I skateboard and BMX a lot and my shoes are destroyed and the gal at the store was like nothing was weird which really helped. After that it went a bit smoother. It really felt like everyone I saw that noticed me was judging and that's what really put me off. It took a while but eventually it all came out just fine in the end.

Nobody cares which was great, and actually the waitress at the restarting we went to was really nice. There was a cute waiter that kept looking and he seemed really confused lol.
"Bravery is the capacity to perform properly when scared half to death.



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HoneyStrums

You'll be ok, I'm sure :)

Going out with friends and/or family is a grate opportunity. I still struggle going ot by myself, but with company I an go anywhere.

Not being able to go out by myself as much as I can with others makes me feel like a burden at times, but im not they enjoy my company. Take any offer go out with family and friends when they are offered, it all helps you to feel comfortable.

Goofluck
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Megumi

Quote from: Jasriella on September 01, 2014, 11:09:06 AM
I'm absolutely terrified right now. My mom and sister are coming to pick me up for a girls day out and I've never been in public like this. It's going to happen, and I made as best an attempt I could at makeup but I swear it's not enough. I'm feeling like having a panic attack or something I've never been this scared.

It's gotta happen at some point though. Might as well do it with family that's doing this for me....... If I live I'll let y'all know how it went.
You have absolutely nothing to fear, like you said you have your family there with you so nothing will go wrong since I've only noticed that people mess with you when you are all alone. Many of us ventured out into the world for the first time all alone. I still shudder when I think about going out in public for the first time. I was alone and scared to death, looked awful & had 0 confidence in myself. I survived.

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Mark3

Quote from: Jasriella on September 01, 2014, 03:16:04 PM
It was really rough and nerve racking to begin with especially when I started to go look at shoes. I skateboard and BMX a lot and my shoes are destroyed and the gal at the store was like nothing was weird which really helped. After that it went a bit smoother. It really felt like everyone I saw that noticed me was judging and that's what really put me off. It took a while but eventually it all came out just fine in the end.

Nobody cares which was great, and actually the waitress at the restarting we went to was really nice. There was a cute waiter that kept looking and he seemed really confused lol.

That's great news..! Glad it went okay.. I'm sure that each time you go out you'll feel less self conscious, and who knows, maybe the waiter will send you a drink next time..!  :)
"The soul is beyond male and female as it is beyond life and death."
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awilliams1701

I can't agree with this more. This has been my experience.

Quote from: bluebirdx88 on September 01, 2014, 02:44:17 PM
Confidence! Just try to keep calm and take a few deep breaths if you need them... Let your sis know how you're feeling if it makes you feel any safer. You have to keep a positive mindset and just keep relaxed... What most people will notice is confidence, (Trust me.. confidence does a LOT more than 40 pounds of make-up can...) If you think you hear people commenting or looking funny, remember half the time it's really your mind playing tricks on you, that or they really aren't worth the attention. If you think you're a star, people will see you as a star ;)

Took me a long time to realize this... So yep, chin up and smile, you can do it! :)

PS: The captcha insists violets are blue... But I could swear they are purple, hehe..
Ashley
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