Good evening guys and dolls.

How would you feel if you couldn't have HRT and surgery and didn't know when you'd ever be able to do it or even IF you'd ever be able to do it? And you couldn't pass without HRT. And you're just stuck.
You have no control over your life, because you have no control over your body and when or IF it ever gets well.
How would you feel seriously?

Sappy, optimistic BS not appreciated. No 'tips' or 'advice' please. Just how YOU would feel.

I would not like it.  That is the long and short of it.


Sarah L.

 I would feel like I`m waiting to die. Or black , not living.

When I set out I told myself that if I could not be reasonably passable or denied HRT, I would not go down the path. Now though, after coming so far? I would never go back now, no matter what.

Quote from: Nero on September 26, 2007, 06:05:39 PM
Sappy, optimistic BS not appreciated. No 'tips' or 'advice' please. Just how YOU would feel.

Horrible!

tink

When I was younger HRT was a mythical dream.... seemed totaly unobtainable...  thank what ever powers that be for that small mirical of finding it...

GRS is friggan expensive, and I dont care what anyone says <this if theres a will theres a way BS is good for some but its about as true as thye tooth fairy or a working government thats fair to everyone>  at this point its so far off into the future its driving me nuts...  Im seriously considering contracting in iraq to fund it....  Thats how I feel...

if both were totaly unobtainable and so far off I couldnt see them in anything but my dreams... Honestly Id rather not say how Id feel or if Id feel at all....   

I would feel as if my life were over! you wanted honesty

This will probably tick off "Nero"...but, ditto, what everyone else said!!!!

It would feel pretty horrible, I don't know how I would deal with it to be honest.

Suicidal.  Is that bleak enough for ya?

Stormy

Thanks everyone. I feel a bit better knowing my feelings are somewhat normal for a TS in this situation. Can't thank you enough, I was afraid I was weak or something for feeling this hopeless.

Would probably try to get HRT through many means (health risks can be ignored as the alternative is suicide and there is always black market, sleeping with doctors etc).

As for SRS I could probably live without it (although not very happy) if having access to HRT and passing.

#$%&*@  up

Quote from: Nero on September 26, 2007, 11:36:19 PM
Thanks everyone. I feel a bit better knowing my feelings are somewhat normal for a TS in this situation. Can't thank you enough, I was afraid I was weak or something for feeling this hopeless.

isn't it funny that for most of us we have went our entire lives being told we weren't "normal" and we have accepted that to the rest of the world we might never be considered "normal". but as long as we can find some level of normal amoungst ourselves we feel ok (to an extent) with how abnormal the rest of the world sees us for the moument anyway! Nero with the situation that you are going through if you were anything near weak you wouldn't have made it this far (I don't know if I could have!!) you have displayed more strength than I think I posses.
sorry I hope this didn't come off as sappy it is honestly how I feel!

How would I feel?  Like I do now!  It sucks big time.

However, I thought I could never be a candidate for HRT, like you, due to health reasons.  While I am still there, over the last year the possibility has been increasing that I will be able to.  Tests are coming out better. But it has taken an extreme amount of determination, medication, and reorganization of diet, exercise, schedule, etc.  To call it a lifestyle change would be a gross understatement. 

It is not phony optimism to say that I truly hope you can get better.  It does happen!

Kristi

My answer is that I'd feel exactly as I do now. For various reasons, I didn't proceed w/ HRT and so I live with being the person I am inside with a body that doesn't match. Sometimes it's really painful, and other times I somehow manage to deal with it. Who knows what will be next week, or next year??

zythyra

Um, I would probably closet and wait till my Mother and Father die then blow my brains out. I.e. a return to the plan I had.

How would you feel if you couldn't have HRT and surgery and didn't know when you'd ever be able to do it or even IF you'd ever be able to do it? And you couldn't pass without HRT. And you're just stuck.
You have no control over your life, because you have no control over your body and when or IF it ever gets well.
How would you feel seriously?


That is my situation.....lack of finance, lack of support and lack of treatment or anyone willing to give me a referral for GRS, despite being full time RLT for many years.....my original gender dysphoria diagnosis was back in October 1984...

You try living 20 years in limbo...

I'd feel trapped & hopeless.

Quote from: Yvonne on September 27, 2007, 11:12:01 PM
I'd feel trapped & hopeless.

I do....