Hi, everyone. I'm new to this site and I have a few questions about my discomfort in my female body.

Just a backstory: I have had a negative body image and have exhibited eating disorder behaviors ever since adolescence when my body became distinctly "developed." Over the past year and a half or so, it's begun to dawn on me that some of my discomfort in my own skin can definitely be attributed to discomfort in a woman's body, and that the reason I've been so focused on losing weight is not solely because I feel fat (even though I'm at a healthy weight), but because when women lose significant weight, they often shrink in the typical areas where fat is stored in women: thighs, hips, and, of course, breasts.

I've recently strongly considered buying a binder (I've always been extremely self-conscious about my larger chest), but I have a hard time justifying it to myself because I am not trans*.

I guess my questions are:

I'm already 19...is this too late to be just discovering I don't feel myself in a woman's body?

Even though I don't personally identify strongly with the female body, I DO identify as a (heterosexual) girl in my mind and behaviors. I possess personality traits that are considered by most (in our culture) to be typically feminine: very emotional and sensitive, empathetic, gentle, non-aggressive, appreciative of beauty. Is it strange that I am most definitely a girl but kind of reject my female body?

Is it ok to wear a binder and dress more "gender-ambiguous" even though I don't really identify as genderqueer?

In the past year I've begun to dress a little less traditionally-feminine, but I want to do more to minimize my figure. Would I be a "poser" if I were to dress in more boyish clothing but still consider myself a girl?

I'm not looking for validation or affirmation, but any second opinions or thoughts would be appreciated! (Don't feel compelled to address all of these points!) Thanks so much for reading.

you can dress however you want, girl. you aren't posing by being yourself. a tomboy is still a girl.

i don't identify as woman, but i dress like one anyway. i don't feel too much discomfort in my female body, though i'd like to get it changed to fit me a little better as soon as i can in the future.

gender is an interesting thing, that some times doesn't really fit perfectly with your birth sex, and neither with your image of a body you can feel comfortable in.

it's not too late to realize at 19, the reason why your body feels wrong. suppressing thoughts that don't seem to fit into anything you've ever heard of is almost incredibly easy, and it might even be that you couldn't get all the way to thinking the thought, because how can you consider something you don't know exists? it's a scary thing to suddenly realize you have thoughts that don't fit with what you know of the world and how it's supposed to work. i did know i was trans when i was in middle school, but i completely dismissed the thought because what i thought trans was, or had to do, didn't fit with my own feelings of who i am. took a long time to realize again how trans i am, and how impossible it will become for me to deny this fact.

you might want to consider a breast reduction surgery, rather than the mastectomy that trans men typically get. the smaller they are, the easier they are to bind down. and maybe you won't even feel the same need to hide them if they are small enough. just a though that you might want to examine for a little bit, i know someone non-binry who had a breast reduction because that would allow hir to be woman or man or androgyn as they felt like it. easier to bind, but still looks ok in a bra. it would be a tiny bit weird for a woman to want no breasts at all, and i doubt you'd find much help with removing them as long as you identify as a woman. unfair, i think, but that's just how normative binary minds work. a man who identifies as a man won't get a neo vagina easily either, even if he genuinely wants one, and knows it's right for him.

Taka is way ahead of me here, but this to quote you:

Jacqolantern: the reason I've been so focused on losing weight is not solely because I feel fat (even though I'm at a healthy weight), but because when women lose significant weight, they often shrink in the typical areas where fat is stored in women: thighs, hips, and, of course, breasts.

How interesting.

I lost 35 lbs prior to hormonal transition.

I did that to minimize the fat redistribution.   it allows me to tone down the female side when out and about as a male presenting genderqueer.  it also made me eye candy once transitioned, in my dysphoric self perception....

Dress any way that authentically expresses who you are, and those who like it will be drawn to you, enriching your life.

Nails out, living free

--Satinjoy