My whole life, since I was eleven, I have been into guys. I still am kind of, but not sexually. At this point sex disgusts me, especially penises, especially mine. Gosh they gross me out! However, I can't see myself with a female, it's unnatural for me, oh gosh me being with a female is even more gross. What is wrong with me??? I'm only turning 23 on Friday!!! Am I never going to be with someone, because these feelings??? Sorry if I offended anyone.

 I've always been pansexual. It has been my experience that playing with a man's penis is very fulfilling and nothing at all like the defect between my legs. You can hate what you were born with while still loving them on men.

I really do not believe there is anything at all 'wrong' with you.  Why?  Well I think that when the topic is sexual preference or any changes in comfortability associated with any aspects of physical attraction it does not 'cause' a person to become better or worse.  Instead of better or worse its just another aspect of yourself coming thru.  So there is only one thing that is imprortant, to be happy, once you allow yourself to 'be yourself' your own individual and unique light will shine.  This in turn will bring about the meeting of that certain someone when the time is right.  Enjoy who you are.  Dani

I've said it before, and I'll say it again.  Once you're trans, you're pretty much beyond queer anyway.  You like who you like.  Who cares about labels anyway?

Jaz650, I don't know where I stand. I am ftm pre any surgery now and not really interested in either guys or girls.  I don't like having female parts of my own now, thou I hope when I have completely transitioned I will be interested in girls.  I think now that is where I am heading.  I don't like breasts, vagina and what goes with them on me but that is not saying I don't like them on my partner.

There is way more to sexuality than the simple gay/straight binary, maybe have a read up on different kinds of sexualities. You don't owe it to anyone to be anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.

Confusion is normal. Everybody's sexually confused to a degree, even if not consciously. I definitely think you shouldn't worry too much. Just live your life and if you find someone you like and are attracted to, whether they are a boy or a girl, just chat with them and try to connect. An emotionally healthy connection is key to success in relationships, and I think it comes before sexual attraction.

In terms of who you are sexually attracted to, I see your point, I get why you hate penises. You may be projecting characteristics you hate in yourself to other people. I used to think like this in middle school, I hated to look at how hairy guys' legs were, or their mustache, or their big muscles, I just got sick imagining I could ever look like them. But then I realized how hot they were. There was this half-Chinese guy I used to have lunch with and he was soooo attractive. This was when I realized being attracted to a man's physical characteristics didn't mean I had to like and want them for myself. Otherwise, straight cis-women would all want to be men. You're kinda blocked right now by these feelings, but I think you'll go along and they'll eventually disappear as you realize you are happy in your skin. You could maybe talk to a therapist who deals with these issues? I surely think you're hating men's bodies because you hate your more maleish characteristics (i.e genitalia) and I understand you. I couldn't picture myself with a man before, because I would be grossed out. Now it doesn't matter. Also, if you ever want to be sexual with a man, you're not obligued in any way to use your genitalia. You don't have to, there's no one who can push you to do it.

Nobody can turn into a lesbian or bisexual btw. You either are or aren't, and there's people who find it sooner and people who find later. Usually denial adds to the equation.

You're surely going to be with someone someday. You need to meet the right people, go for a hobby you enjoy to meet people you share something with. Remember, love evolves and happens naturally. It can't be forced. It will happen when you least expect it, and sometimes at inappropriate times but oh well . You're going to be alright.

Best of luck,
x

Quote from: Auroramarianna on September 10, 2014, 03:06:51 PM
Confusion is normal. Everybody's sexually confused to a degree, evn if not consciously. I definitely think you shouldn't worry too much. ust live your life and if you find someone you like and are attracted to, whether they are a boy or a girl, just chat with them and try to connect. An emotionally healthy connection is key to success in relationships, and I think it comes before sexual attraction.

In terms of who you are sexually attracted to, I see your point, I get why you hate penises. You may be projecting characteristics you hate in yourself to other people. I used to think like this in middle school, I hated to look at how hairy guys' legs were, or their mustache, or their big muscles, I just got sick imagining I could ever look like them. But then I realized how hot they were. There was this half-Chinese guy I used to have lunch with and he was sososo attractive. This was when I realized being attracted to a man's physical characteristics didn't mean I had to like and want them for myself. Otherwise, straight cis-women would all want to be men. You're kinda blocked right now by these feelings, but I think you'll go along and they'll eventually disappear as you realize you are happy in your skin. You could maybe talk to a therapist who deals with these issues? I surely think you're hating men's bodies because you hate your more maleish characteristics (i.e genitalia) and I understand you. I couldn't picture myself with a man before, because I would be grossed out. Now it doesn't matter. Also, if you ever want to be sexual with a man, you're not obligued in any way to use your genitalia. You don't have to, there's no one who can push you to do it.

Nobody can turn into a lesbian or bisexual btw. You either are or aren't, and there's people who find it sooner and people who find later. Usually denial adds to the equation.

You're surely going to be with someone someday. You need to meet the right people, go for a hobby you enjoy to meet people you share something with. Remember, love evolves and happens naturally. It can't be forced. It will happen when you least expect it, and sometimes at inappropriate times but oh well . You're going to be alright.

Best of luck,
x

Thank you! That was very helpful.