I am an ftm who moved into an alternative dorm for those with learning differences in Vermont this past Sunday.The staff know about me being ftm but the students do not. So far I am getting along with everyone great but things feel awkward and uncomfortable for me. I believe that is because people here think I'm a cisgendered heterosexual guy and it feels good to be recognized as the person I am. At the same time being trans is a part of me I embrace. I feel happy that everyone thinks of me as a typical guy but mostly I just wish that I could be out as trans here and there wouldn't be a possibility of people treating me differently or not understanding. I feel like I am both a typical guy and a trans person. I feel like one part of me is being fulfilled and the other is being neglected. I'm starting to think thst although this is a great program for most people with learning differences to get support with their studies it is not the right place for me. I feel an awful disconnect from the other students because I feel as though I am not being myself. I know it is most likely not a good idea to tell any of the students as a lot of them have displayed super unaccepting behavior and I don't want to tell someone who I think I can trust and then they go and tell other people and everyone knows. I feel stuck and I just don't know what to do. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice or suggestions for coping strategies would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading.

Maybe it isn't the right place for you. Maybe the people are more accepting and trustworthy than they seem (or could be if they began to shed some of their ignorance). Maybe (any of a million third options could go here).

I haven't been in that exact situation so I don't have any personal advice or promises of it-gets-better, but I read what you said and I can really sympathize.

I feel like if you want to be out, you should be able to be out. If that creates a situation that is unsafe or uncomfortable, then the option of leaving and finding a new school, or just a new dorm hall or something, might become something worth looking into.

Check around on your school's website (or Google) and see if there are any campus resources available to trans students. My school had a trans-inclusive Women's Center and a Queer Resource Center that both helped me immensely... sadly I didn't discover them until my fifth year of college.

You don't have to let the people in your dorm or program be the ones you are emotionally close with. I found my home with the people in those centers, after years of trying and failing to fit in with other psychology majors and people who lived on my end of the campus.