i've already told the fact that i've come out to a friend in another post but thought i should share the actual conversation. please note that this is the FIRST EVER time i'm coming out to anybody outside susan's place and that support group. i was under so much pressure that day- 26th and i just couldn't keep it locked in any longer. so i spilled it to a friend who was chatting with me then. luckily she turned out to be one of the two friends i was planning to come out first to.
so here's the story, i've removed the names and translated what we've said in my language and omitted a few sensitive information. the conversation is still running and she sounds very curious and supportive luckily, and i'm just putting here the beginning.
on that day she had baited me into a silly game, where you must post one of the given embarrassing statements as your status on fb, and whenever someone likes or comments on that post you must forward the message to them informing they're caught into the game and telling them the statements. she had sent me that msg and we were discussing the pros and cons of random statements trying to decide what i should post, when statement no.13 caught my eye- ' 13) I feel like I must tell the truth to everyone, but not yet.' and then it went like this. i'm Y****** and my friend is A******
Y******
no13 is quite true but i don't really want to make a scene of it
u still there a***?
A******
Hmmm, guess I m now.. why?
Y******
nah i thought i should tell u something. i'm still deciding whether to tell it now
out of all people u'll understand it the best i suppose, but well..
A******
Oh, common... its nt another game right?
Y******
no you idiot
A******
Then tell...
Y******
can you keep a secret? and not tell it to any soul, not even to your parents, or even to yourself, not even in your dreams?
and nobody's gonna check ur phone's browsing history right?
A******
Well nt sure about tht.. ok ok I won't.. sure..
no soul would touch my phone... and get away alive..
Y******
okay then. i've wanted to tell u this for a long time. i'd have preferred to say it directly but it doesn't seem like we'd be meeting any sooner. i can't keep this in much longer
A******
I see tht u r upto something....
wht is it? Im sure u cut paste tht msg... right?
Y******
promise me you won't judge me by what i'm going to say now, and nothing will change about our friendship
idiot this is not a game i'm being dead serious
A******
Ok... promise.. Tell me at least now.. plzz.. begging now.. my patience is over the limit...
Y******
yeah yeah i have troubles with my phone's internet. okay then
you remember those days at Mr.S******'s clz? u,me,b****** and s*****
and there were things you guys found funny? stuff about me?
you said you were suspicious about me for something?
A******
U r going to say u r.... WHAT??
Y******
tell me exactly what you were suspicious of
not the case with b******. what u suspected before that. the joke that lead to b******'s case
A******
Sry, I promised u I wont judge.. just tell it dude.. no guesses... we were suspicious abt many things... tell it straight.. plzz
U r driving me crazy..
Y******
you said, you were wondering if i were a guy in disguise? that you were not sure if i were a girl? you did say that right? maybe not you but one of you did
A******
Guess we did.. so wht? We were just joking dude.. wht r u trying to tell me? Just spit it out.. I told u I wont judge...
Y******
you were joking i know.
but you were right. i wasn't sure of it then. i didn't know what i was. but i do know now. and you guys had been right the whole time
A******
Sooo??
Wht? Wait.. wht make u think so?
Y******
cos i know. i couldn't handle the doubt so i researched in the internet. i was thinking i was the only person in the world with such an issue. but it turns out there's a great many
in fact it's a medical condition
A******
With wht an issue..? R u hiding something, I dnt get it y***.. I dnt see wht u r telling... sry..
Y******
it's medically termed gender dysphoria. generally people like me are called transgender. you remember everywhere its lgbt- lgbt community, lgbt support group and all? ever wondered what the letters stand for? i belong in the t
A******
Hey, cool down... give me minute to think..
Y******
would you do me the help of looking up the term before saying anything? read at least the wikipedia article? you'll know the issue better then
A******
Ok, y***.. thts why I asked fr a little time.. u sleep now.. dnt think about anything.. ok?
I ll try to find someway to help u... just dnt get stressed.. Sleep now.. lets talk in the morning....
Y******
yeah you're a great buddy. really appreciate u just listening there. i really needed to spill it off to somebody. i'm not in a shock or anything ok, i found this out last yr but kept it in till at least we got out of school. it might be hard for you to believe, but this is earth. strange things happen. i'll check for ur reply. thanks a mole again
oh and if you feel one head is not enough to process it all i won't mind if you tell b****** about this. but first make sure to get her to make the same promises you made. i was planning to break this to both of you together but i could get hold of u only. gn then let's talk in the morning
and also, i'm open to any and all points of information. i know a great deal about this now ok, i've been researching for long. and there are forums where people like me and friends and families can discuss their problems
Saturday
A******
Yh, first before I tell u anything.. cn I ask u a few questions? Who else knw this? Ur mom? Probably no right? Its ok.. and how do u feel abt it? I mean I knw u r strng enough to nt get depressed.. so I want the truth.. do u regret or feel tht u want to change? I researched this a bit.. first I wont tell b****.. coz, its ur right to decide it, and as this is a bit sensitive a problem to someone who is a bit far from biology.. yet u do as u wish..
and I wish I could hv met u to discuss this.. its nt possible right? So answer my questions in the best way u cn, thn I will tell u wht I feel u should do.. ok?
I think I knw u pretty well, so feel free to tell anything.. ok? I ll promised I ll help u.. so I will.. take ur time and reply me.. I cn wait...
later in the conversation she said very nice things like,
'well I m the one getting depressed now... btw I like tht term.. like u were inside something all the while'
'U think abt this too much.. r u worried abt the society? Who cres wht they think.. as u must hv senn some research say being transgender or whtever is perfectly natural... and I cn give u an example if u dnt mind..'
'Yh, I knw its pretty normal.. to me u will always be y*** and only y***... yet dnt worry I think others will understand too.. yet dnt tell others fr a moment.. wait till I find a correct moment to spill it out to b****.. trust me... I ll try to be subtle abt it.. yet u wait ok? If nt things will turn bad.. but dnt get depressed, plzz ok? Just relax dr.. we will find a solution... ok? Give it a little time.. .'
i feel like i've made the best decision in years. it surely was surprising how well she took it all. so that's it. i'm finally OUT!!! even to just one trusted friend
