This is for anyone who has balls and a penis. If you don't, your consolation prize is that I envy you. Hell, if you pack, then you could probably do this, too! (I think? I'm not sure how that works.)

For this, you'll need a cigarette and a pair of sunglasses. Place the sunglasses above your penis, where your pubic hair grows. Stick the cigarette between your balls and penis. Bounce up and down, and it looks like a guy talking to you!

If this is too off-topic, or crude, or anything, it's just to contrast this awful event that happened last week. https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php?topic=174711