Quote from: BreezyB on October 07, 2014, 04:17:48 AM
Well it sounds like not one of us are actually what my Psychiatrist (or anyone's for that matter) would call typical Gender Dysphoric individuals. So where have they got this idea that there is a typical version of us? So their must be an awful lot of atypical gender Dysphoria diagnosiss going around.

Or perhaps the whole concept is flawed, the idea of what is typical of a transgender person. I think we are as varied as the spectrum of gender itself.

I'm having a talk with my psychiatrist, this girls not a happy camper 

Because they learn from what they read or are taught or learn from conferences. As for atypical or typical person LGBT or cis, I wish someone could show me a typical person. I don't think I have ever met a purely typical person in my life. Typical and atypical are pretty much generalizations and doesn't mean normal or abnormal. They are just going by studies and certain markers to diagnose.

Quote from: Jess42 on October 08, 2014, 07:59:36 AM
Because they learn from what they read or are taught or learn from conferences. As for atypical or typical person LGBT or cis, I wish someone could show me a typical person. I don't think I have ever met a purely typical person in my life. Typical and atypical are pretty much generalizations and doesn't mean normal or abnormal. They are just going by studies and certain markers to diagnose.

I would have to agree Jess. So maybe more of us should be attending these conferences to give therapists a true perspective. Or better yet, who wants to be a therapist? Anyone, anyone, anyone?
Ok I'll come back to that question.... 

So gatekeepers push us to tell a specific sort of story, with the threat of withholding treatment... then turn around and declare that story is "typical" and what they usually hear? Gee, I wonder why?!! (Not this therapist in particular, just that there's a reason why this narrative is typical, all right.)

I didn't realize I needed to transition until I was 32, and I lived happily as a guy up until then. I guess I'm extra-special atypical. I also transitioned in 11 months and am still thrilled about it, so whatever; the insistence on the typical narrative had me, too, convinced that I was faking or wrong for a long time, but now I'd say I've proven I'm "really" trans. So there.

Hi hi! Ah I don't fall under the so called typical gender dysphoria. I didn't like playing with dolls or figures or toy cars but I preferred puzzles, marbles, lego or reading. As for dressing up I actually liked only wearing underwear when I was really young and a little older I would not wear a shirt whenever I can hahaha. But I didn't have a preference besides just anything comfy. Also for what activities I liked doing outside when I was younger was swimming, racquet sports or just running.

I hate the old fashioned views on transsexuals. It tries to lump us all together. It says that we're very effeminate boys growing up, constantly taking up very stereotypical feminine activities and were gay men at some point. We're told we have to be hyperfeminine, wear dresses constantly, have long slowing hair, cake on make up and have surgeries to pass flawlessly. The old school way of thinking was to have us adopt a 1950's stereotype and hide the fact that we were assigned male at birth. The whole thing is just really creepy if you ask me. I say the only true common experience that we have is that we have dysphoria, the disconnect between our gender and our physical sex. Everyone experiences it differently and in no way do we need anyone, especially professionals, to stereotype us.

Quote from: Jenna Marie on October 08, 2014, 08:48:41 AM
the insistence on the typical narrative had me, too, convinced that I was faking or wrong for a long time, but now I'd say I've proven I'm "really" trans. So there.

It's not just the therapists, many of those who transitioned pre-2000 seem to have adopted a ->-bleeped-<-r-than-thou attitude...like they're trying to maintain the purity of the trans community. And unfortunately they're the ones who have written most of the information about being transgender, at least what's available online.

I understand that they're trying to put the fear of God into people who probably shouldn't transition, but the "typical trans" narrative is what had me convinced for 15 years that I couldn't really be transgender

Katiej : True enough, though I got the sense that in some cases that too could be laid t the therapists' door - some of the earlier transitioners learned that this was the precise narrative they had to memorize and regurgitate, and they're trying to enforce it on the new generation (either out of a misguided effort to be helpful, or the belief that if they had to jump through those hoops so should everyone).

Someone like us likely wouldn't have been allowed to transition 20 years ago, so some of those who did it back then think we really are NOT trans, I guess. But the joke's on them.

(I do know what you mean, though. Ironically, I had a therapist who was 100% supportive of both me and people with non-binary identities, and all the pushback I received about not being trans enough came from other trans women.)

By all accounts transitioning 20+ years ago was a horrific experience. And i think the enormity of their accomplishment contributes to a sense of superiority over those of us whose transition has been comparatively easier.

They seem to think that anyone who doesn't fit their stereotype is really just a cross-dresser taking it too far.

I don't think there is such thing as atypical gender dysphoric. We're all atypical as defined by our society in some way, whatever label we identify ourselves. CDs, trans, transgender, drag queens/kings, etc etc, we are all seen as exotic at the very least. It's improving, slowly. But I say who cares. If you're dysphoric, then you're most likely trans and it's not you liking video games or playing football that will invalidade your experience. You are 100% justified in the way you feel. This how I feel about this. If you're in pain because of your assigned sex characteristics and would live better as a woman, then who is to say you're not trans but something else. Ugh. Forget labels, move on with your life, and find with what you want and can live with.

A lot of the times in the media you only see where the person knew pretty much since birth that they were trans, and played with specific toys or wore certain clothing to try and feel comfortable. When I first started questioning my gender, I didn't think I could be trans because I haven't always known I am male. I just don't see how they can say that you are "atypical" because in my opinion there is no "definitive trans experience"....rather, it's objective.

Quote from: Jenna Marie on October 08, 2014, 11:56:27 AM
Katiej : True enough, though I got the sense that in some cases that too could be laid t the therapists' door - some of the earlier transitioners learned that this was the precise narrative they had to memorize and regurgitate, and they're trying to enforce it on the new generation

I would agree Jenna and this certainly crossed my mind before starting to transition. I mean I didn't present any of the so called 'stereotypical' behaviours, so I was convinced that in order to begin HRT I would need to put on a show. Luckily though, that is not me, and so I sat there with my Psychiatrist scratching his head, and he even said and I quote "I just don't get it" (whilst scratching his head!).

The other side of this is of course when we're made to jump through hoops it may drive an individual to take things into their own hands in terms of hormones which would be highly dangerous and not advised by any means.

So we have one of two choices when we realize and wish to go on hormones.

Try to get it through our doctors we are all unique and no two people are the same
"You are all individuals"
"We are all individuals"
"No I'm not"
"Shhh"
(The Life of Brian)

OR

We can grab the textbooks, read, memorize and regurgitate the script until everyone involved get psittacosis. Due to the amount of parroting on we are doing. Yet the problem with that is we only become part of the problem and for the next generation (older or younger). The solution may have become all the more harder for them

Quote from: immortal gypsy on October 08, 2014, 08:21:52 PM

We can grab the textbooks, read, memorize and regurgitate the script until everyone involved get psittacosis. Due to the amount of parroting on we are doing. Yet the problem with that is we only become part of the problem and for the next generation (older or younger). The solution may have become all the more harder for them

Unfortunately I think that may cross many a trans persons mind. But yes, we would simply be perpetuating an already challenging situation.

Quote from: immortal gypsy on October 08, 2014, 08:21:52 PM
So we have one of two choices when we realize and wish to go on hormones.

Try to get it through our doctors we are all unique and no two people are the same
"You are all individuals"
"We are all individuals"
"No I'm not"
"Shhh"
(The Life of Brian)

OR

We can grab the textbooks, read, memorize and regurgitate the script until everyone involved get psittacosis. Due to the amount of parroting on we are doing. Yet the problem with that is we only become part of the problem and for the next generation (older or younger). The solution may have become all the more harder for them

I never had any issues with the first option.. He was quite aware we are all individuals - hell, I don't make the requirements for a diagnosis under the DSM and as such, fail the WPATH requirements. I'm pleased to close the chapter in my life called 'Transition'.. He used his experience to work with me, not merely check off my 'symptoms'. It was also quite clear that the second option would not work with him.

I just went in there and told the truth about my life experiences and how I felt. I don't think anyone should have to go in feeling like they have to convince their therapist that they are trans. If you are, you are. Seeing that people make up stories to get on HRT makes me a little sad. 

I've found that a lot of girls' experiences are quite different from mine since joining this site. All together the diagnosis and treatment of Gender Dysphoria is highly individualized.

I asked my psychologist today what my diagnosis was, she just said the only issue I have is gender dysphoria. I suppose she figured we both knew that already.  She's going to get me my carry letter next session. Anyway, she didn't mention anything about being atypical or normal transgender.

Quote from: kelly_aus on October 09, 2014, 02:17:37 AM
I never had any issues with the first option.. He was quite aware we are all individuals - hell, I don't make the requirements for a diagnosis under the DSM and as such, fail the WPATH requirements. I'm pleased to close the chapter in my life called 'Transition'.. He used his experience to work with me, not merely check off my 'symptoms'. It was also quite clear that the second option would not work with him.

Kelly if that was your experience. Well then IF my body decides to play games with me this time around (anti convulsants and hormones can be fun). I might just move to South Australia next time I have the courage and confidence to try again. By the end I was starting to wonder if mine was even listening to me, it just seemed we where going around in circles half the time

Quote from: immortal gypsy on October 09, 2014, 03:02:06 AM
Kelly if that was your experience. Well then IF my body decides to play games with me this time around (anti convulsants and hormones can be fun). I might just move to South Australia next time I have the courage and confidence to try again. By the end I was starting to wonder if mine was even listening to me, it just seemed we where going around in circles half the time

Well, I know he has an opening, he set me free a couple of weeks back..

I agree there is no 'typical' gender dysphoria, and I guess since finding out I'm intersexed I don't know what I am. Am I transgendered or intersexed or both? Seriously. I did all the little girl things till about four and was forbidden from dressing up or getting into my mom's makeup and stopped till about twelve. I told my mom at twelve though , that if I couldn't live as a girl I didn't want to live, so I guess that was pretty heavy. Told most of my good friends and most every girlfriend I had. Finally, at sixteen I told my dad, too, and my mom hadn't told him anything about me being in her clothes and makeup every time she left and I was home. They sent me to a psychiatrist, who had my hormones and chromosomes tested. I had low testosterone, high estrogen, but my chromosomes were XY. I didn't hide it well, because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. If my mom would have told me at twelve or if both my parents would have told me I was intersexed at sixteen, my whole life would have been different and had some meaning forty odd years before it finally did. I raced motocross, was addicted to basketball, pitched in a summer league for a college team and was a very good tennis player. I still couldn't hide it and the fact that I was always more attracted to men than women, but that took me decades to really come to terms with.  Now I'd never be with a woman, cis or trans. I just want a straight guy, my guy.

In a country with strict gatekeeping, I can understand toeing the company line and telling them what they want to hear. After all, they set up those hoops, and they expect us to jump through them.

I haven't felt a need to convince my therapist of my transness. Cis people don't obsess over gender like I do. So that's all the diagnosis I need. So i treat my therapist more like a life coach who's helping me get through transition.

At least in a few states in the US we have a handful of informed consent endocrinologists. For some people a therapist is a great idea, but for me it's a massive waste of time and money.