My estradiol dose was increased recently - low to moderately low - and instead of my dysphoria decreasing (like it did when I went from no dose to low dose), it's coming back with a vengeance.  It's like the bad old days: can't think of anything but being a girl, can't look at a woman (even for a fraction of a second) without feeling like I'd give anything to become her, despising my own body and reflection etc.

WTF?

Sounds to me your emotional state is more intense now than before. I am not sure though. I have ups and downs like this pretty frequently now and in my case it is just hurry up and work high dose, jeesh. I mean, I am at the point I feel female, but there are still of few things I wish would change more rapidly. Oh the problems us 48 year old teens have! 

Quote from: Jessica Merriman on October 19, 2014, 08:44:58 PM. . . in my case it is just hurry up and work high dose, jeesh. I mean, I am at the point I feel female, but there are still of few things I wish would change more rapidly.

I'm wondering if I'm seeing the first signs of something similar.  Mentally, I consider myself utterly female (thanks to the estradiol - wonderful stuff), and now that the body is so far behind it's becoming increasingly frustrating.

Quote from: Hanazono on October 19, 2014, 10:01:09 PM
you may need to unwind the dysphoria by scheduling some "me-time" or some distraction.

Wine usually works...

That happened to me with pills but not with injections. I suspect it may have something to do with the metabolism of estrogen. I feel way better on high levels on injections than on pills.

Suggest that you discuss this with your endo.  They see many folk.  They should be able to help or at least put your mind at rest.  Change in dosage and delivery method frequently takes a short while  for the brain to adjust to.  I discussed this with my endo yesterday.  It could be as simple as this.  Always worthwhile sharing your concern with an expert.

Safe travels

Aisla