I flew down to visit Mom Wednesday, to introduce her to her oldest daughter, and help her with the loss of her oldest son.
For two days, she's been calling me by my old name, I told her this morning, on the way to church, I'm sorry, Mom, I am going to stop responding when you call me that name.. she said old habits.. yeah yeah.. well.. today, after church, back home, siting at the table, drinking coffee, she called me Paula.. and.. amazingly, I didnt begin to cry, as I thot i would.. I know she has not arrived, neither have i, but.. she looks at me just a little differently. a good thing, I think.. idk.. My sister.. well, the jury is still out, just as I am to the World.. I am full time now, everywhere I go, I am Paula.. everywhere.. so yeah, i guess I have arrived.. I will just wait for the rest of the world to catch up.. and all I have .. is time..
So, Mom called me Paula, at least once.. I hope, it happened more often.