Drug use/Addiction TW

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wj9Alqug7Bg&feature=share

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEDFMTUg2bM&feature=share

I deceived myself a thousand times
I offended you a thousand times
I lied too much a thousand times,
I repressed everything a thousand times
Repressed everything, everything, everything
But at this very hour.
When I lost you
I realise what I've done to you
And I condemn myself for it
Still I wish I could leave behind some more
I don't know where my rage
Is taking me to
But I don't have the courage for this
There where the horizon
And the sea become one
That's where I want to wait for you
So that you could find me there.
I spoke too much a thousand times
(I felt) the same sorrow a thousand times
I broke your heart a thousand times
I regretted it too late a thousand times
Regretted too late, too late
But at this very hour
When the wind suddenly changes its direction
I am reaping the whirlwind
Which I once sowed myself.
Still I wish I could leave behind some more
I wish I could be more for you
Than an undignified body,
Out of cobblestone and scraped
There where the horizon
And the sea become one
That's where I want to wait for you
So that you could find me there.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/D99LZg18OWg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Stone Cold By Jimmy Barnes Featuring Joe Bonamassa

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/D99LZg18OWg" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

no idea what I'm doing

earlier this day (at school no less):

Manic Depression - Jimi Hendrix

and

In My Life - The Beatles

Feeling that people are rooting for me to fail.