Hi. I'm new here. Just posted in the intro thread, if you'd like to read it. Long story short, I finally realized/accepted this week that I am genderfluid (with a tendency toward masculine). I wore boyish clothes today and for the first time I wasn't ashamed of how I felt or wanted to dress. But here's my problem, although I've been a tomboy all my life, I do not have a wardrobe that reflects my gender fluidity. The 90% of the clothes I have are either too big (I lost 25 pounds!) or too small. The ones that do fit, aren't very masculine as I had been trying to dress as I thought girls should dress. Now that I understand that I'm gender fluid I want to express that more but feel I can't and that's stressing me out. I ordered a binder so that will help a lot but that was a big splurge. I can't afford to go buy a bunch of new clothes. I needed new clothes before I figured out all this gender stuff but couldn't afford it then either. I don't even have enough money to hit up the thrift stores. I had to empty my savings just to buy the binder. I don't know what to do. I guess I just needed to vent and thought y'all would understand.

Hello Trying, welcome!  I would recommend, find the Goodwills near you, amd look thru the guys racks there.  Some great stuff, pretty cheap, unless you really want new.  Most stuff is $3-$6 .. even coats, $6-$8. your sneakers, Payless, or Walmart..  Your shopping isnt any different than mine, your stuff is only a couple racks over, is all.  One of the best things of buying there instead of new from big box stores.. the clothes are already broken in, worn, so you'll blend in better..

good luck!  (whispering, you'll be fine)

Hi Ttbme,
Great advice above.! Plus, if you check eBay, sometimes they have great prices and free shipping,  Its tough I know, no money..
Maybe consider a part time job too.? It might help if you have the time.?

Sorry I can't be more help..

just do not get a job at Goodwill, you are prevented from buying anything there even at a different store! I know it's silly, but they don't want any appearance e of impropriety, using your discount to get stuff even cheaper! Actually I think it's a good policy. Anyhow good luck, you'll be fine honey!

Quote from: Mark3 on November 11, 2014, 03:05:21 AM
Hi Ttbme,
Great advice above.! Plus, if you check eBay, sometimes they have great prices and free shipping,  Its tough I know, no money..
Maybe consider a part time job too.? It might help if you have the time.?

Sorry I can't be more help..

Thank you for your suggestions. It's ok you can't help more. As I said above, I was really just venting. Just want to be heard.

I don't have time for a job right now. I'm a full time student and single parent of a special needs child. I've been trying to think of ways to make money from home but not coming up with anything yet. I cant sew or knit so making and selling stuff it out.

That's a lot to handle dear.  Things will come your way, I am sure you will be glad for that binder.

I still don't have andro stuff yet.  Got some, and making the most of it at work.

For some of us, it takes only one thing we have and can focus on to be more comfortable.  For me that's nails, boots and underwire.  Looks like you have the equal to underwire, could cut the nails, and wear cool shoes one full size less then ladies.

Welcome

Blessings

Satinjoy

I remember once checking out genderfork, and they had an image of a person who wore one outfit but tweaked it to be masculine or feminine. If you can't afford new clothes, maybe try to find a way to tweak the outfits you do have to fit your needs. Their changes to the outfit were very subtle and made a dramatic difference.

If only I could find that picture again...
I used to have it, but switched computers recently and lost all my old information. darn...

EDIT: Im gonna see if I cant find that image again, but in the mean time I'll say that I understand your frustration. My wardrobes pretty limited too, and I dont have a lotta money to buy a ton of fem and butch clothing all separately. All my money goes to food, and all my time goes into studying (I'm in college full time and study many topics outside of school). I had to make the agonizing decision to turn down work offered to me because it's just not realistic to get a job and expect to do well in my studies. Money's gettin tight, so I feel ya...

AnonBear, that's great advice. It's so simply I don't know why I didn't think of it. With that in mind, I found a beanie that was only $1 AND reversible. It really adds a masculine touch.

Np, anything I can do to help. I can't find the image, but yeah just go for middle of the road outfits and tailor them with pins and tucks to change them.

I look at this page when I gotta remember what to do to pass: http://ftmguide.rassaku.net/

Welcome.  I'm a new person here, as well.

I'm bigender, naturally female, but I've just started, so I don't really have a big wardrobe, either.  To be fair, though, I've always had a little more tomboyish wardrobe than most.  I only own one dress, and two pairs of  shoes-- my work sneakers, and their replacements, because the shoe store was having a BOGO. 

I wish you luck! 

Seconding on Thrift Stores, as well.  Granted, I work at one, and we usually have a $5 Dollar Bag sale about once or twice every week.  It's pack as much clothes as you can into a grocery bag sized bag, and you get the entire bag for five bucks.  Not a bad deal, those sacks can hold more than you imagine.  See if any near you have weekly offers like that. 

Quote from: AnonBear on November 11, 2014, 09:15:06 PM
I look at this page when I gotta remember what to do to pass: http://ftmguide.rassaku.net/

it basically says to count calories like my life depended on it.
and find it in me to work out as well.
i'm starting this diet thing again, i seriously need to lose weight.
i still wonder where to get height though, i used to curse my body for not being male because being female meant i could never grow tall enough to become a fighter pilot...

Goodwill is awesome, but you say you have no budget...

If you have sympathetic male friends they may well have a box of old jeans or t-shirts in a closet or the attic.

Probably stuff that they have outgrown. 

(Many college age guys probably have allot of old stuff they outgrew one way or the other...) 

Perhaps if you have a local LGBT group there is someone you can wardrobe swap a bit with?


- Jaded Jade