I've always known that I had the disability dyspraxia, and that it has had a negative impact on my success in life. However, I was unprepared last Saturday to learn that there was an even deeper issue involved with my health: I have the early symptoms of undifferentiated schizophrenia.
Never once in the last six years that I was spiraling into depression did I once think schizophrenia was involved. Now that I look back, though, the diagnosis makes sense: the unwavering belief that people are out to get me, the way the racing thoughts in my head seem to have distinct personalities, that I felt dark presences in my house and hovering over my shoulder, how the symptoms I thought was major depression matches the negative symptoms of schizophrenia.

Schizophrenia is the scariest mental illness I know of but I am prepared for the long, hard journey of self-care that comes with treating it. My concern is how this is going to affect my ability to transition, and interacting with the trans community. I knew I was trans since I was five (even if I didn't always admit it) but having schizophrenia may give health care providers doubt that it's not another delusion. I also know trans folk have had to battle the belief that being trans is a mental illness, particularly schizophrenia, and in turn can be hostile toward trans folk who are indeed mentally ill for fear they will ruin the image of normality they're trying to project.

Shoot, even as I type this I have doubts over whether this is more of my unrealistic fears (the shrink said too my anxiety is off the charts). I guess I just want to reach out in a place I know is safe. What is you all's experience with mental illness in association with the trans community? Have you met another mentally ill trans person or are you one? Please share with me your experiences. I could use the wisdom. Thank you sincerely.

Schizophrenia develops in young adulthood. If you have a history of being trans since 5 years old no one should doubt you, except the ones who would have doubted you were trans without the schizophrenia.

When I came out to my wife she wondered if it might be "something else" (schizophrenia). I pointed out that "something else" was worse and that I was thirty years too late to just be developing it now. At my age, senile dementia is about the only alternative diagnosis. Didn't want that either.

Quote from: Satyrane on November 25, 2014, 02:46:20 PM
I've always known that I had the disability dyspraxia, and that it has had a negative impact on my success in life. However, I was unprepared last Saturday to learn that there was an even deeper issue involved with my health: I have the early symptoms of undifferentiated schizophrenia.
Never once in the last six years that I was spiraling into depression did I once think schizophrenia was involved. Now that I look back, though, the diagnosis makes sense: the unwavering belief that people are out to get me, the way the racing thoughts in my head seem to have distinct personalities, that I felt dark presences in my house and hovering over my shoulder, how the symptoms I thought was major depression matches the negative symptoms of schizophrenia.

Schizophrenia is the scariest mental illness I know of but I am prepared for the long, hard journey of self-care that comes with treating it. My concern is how this is going to affect my ability to transition, and interacting with the trans community. I knew I was trans since I was five (even if I didn't always admit it) but having schizophrenia may give health care providers doubt that it's not another delusion. I also know trans folk have had to battle the belief that being trans is a mental illness, particularly schizophrenia, and in turn can be hostile toward trans folk who are indeed mentally ill for fear they will ruin the image of normality they're trying to project.

Shoot, even as I type this I have doubts over whether this is more of my unrealistic fears (the shrink said too my anxiety is off the charts). I guess I just want to reach out in a place I know is safe. What is you all's experience with mental illness in association with the trans community? Have you met another mentally ill trans person or are you one? Please share with me your experiences. I could use the wisdom. Thank you sincerely.

I have DID, a condition which until fairly recently was confused with schizophrenia...but it's not (there aren't any psychotic delusions associated with DID). Once I started transitioning, many of the manifestations I had have decreased (but none have totally gone away). I was actually ok'd under the "informed consent" method.

I wouldn't think schizophrenia would prevent you from transitioning, so long as you are still lucid enough to know its effect and have a reasonable plan to include important parts of your life in the transition (parts including work, family, faith, friends, etc)

Finally, I would suggest that there are "dark presences" within our senses. There are also "light presences". (There are also delusional presences...)  The trick is to know how to interpret what you're sensing.

Quote from: Satyrane on November 25, 2014, 02:46:20 PM
I felt dark presences in my house and hovering over my shoulder, how the symptoms I thought was major depression matches the negative symptoms of schizophrenia.

You might want to avoid practicing demonolatry if this is truly the case. I didn't reply to the thread concerning discussing the left-hand path religions, because of my vow of secrecy to never discuss the occult, but now I almost feel inclined to do so. You wouldn't be the first person, or occultist that went completely nuts. If you want to know more, you can PM me if you like. If not, try to balance reality with the dayside, instead of focusing on the nightside constantly. That is all I can and want to say publicly.

schizophrenia can often be a miss diagnosis from what I've herd.
my elder brother has it, he was diagnosed at age 14, with full blown hallucinations, it developed from a narcotic induced sycosis, so really hope you don't get it, like he's fully gone with no hope of recovery because before it began he already had ADD on top of a learning disability, so he now has n I.Q of a 8 to 10 year old.

From what I do know about the illness, many have great results from meds n many need to take it for the rest of there lives, but there are lots that are fully functional people with the illness that have sort treatment n haven't lost grip on reality, so that might be important to focus on what you knew was was real before diagnosis.

Also schizophrenia can develop from emotional problems like stress, anxiety, mental breakdowns, trauma etcetera, for example, when I had a mental break down I was watched to see if I was developing symptoms, being that it is in my family (my brother n my cousin have it) but fortunately I wasn't showing signs n I apparently made an amazing recovery from my brake down, which was great to hear, so it's probably really good to acknowledge the possibility n focus on the most valuable things to you in reality, n talk about any issues you may have with a doctor, because getting treatment early on for any emotional or mental issues may prevent it going further into schizophrenia, sycosis n so on n so on, etcetera.