Quote from: Ash on November 19, 2014, 04:56:53 PM
And all the guys spent the next while trying to teach me how to walk like a guy 

Always been very expressive with my hands, flicked my hair, touched my mouth. And if I cross my legs, it's either at the ankles or the knee on top of the knee.
Hip always cocked standing and with the skinny stance I guess it's called?

Also remember playing a soccer match, and someone was taking photos and stuff. My stance and movements were completely off compared to all the other guys. Guess there was a reason they called me twinkletoes 

Ha. It's always great to know that people had a similar experience. Do you remember, "Why are you standing that way?"? That's one my father used to ask me all the time. I feel like that sometimes having had always moved like a female is what has made my social transition rather easy compared to some stories I have heard.

My masculine mannerisms are actually part of why I think I'm trans, no idea where I got them from as I've been in girls' schools all my life and never spent much time around boys or men as a kid. My mom's been telling me to sit like a girl for as long as I can remember (among other things), yet I still almost always sit with my legs apart when I'm not consciously thinking about sitting in a more "socially appropriate" way.

Now though that I'm letting myself just be myself and see where that takes me, I sometimes feel like I'm carrying myself in a not-quite-masculine-enough way and I feel the need to masculinize the way I'm acting. Maybe this is me trying to counteract all the comments I've received over the years about me acting like a guy. I had a group of friends in high school that would point out every single action I did and say "you do [whatever thing it is] like a guy," it was kinda amusing because I had no idea that I carried myself in a masculine manner. That's not to say I didn't like it though.

typical dude things:

rearrange your ball 9most dudes think nobody notice them...LOL), scratch you butt (more LOL), pull you sagging pants up, specially when a hot chick is coming on sight.... when talking to another guy make sure you stand side by side, never front to front, when pensive stock your chin...

I picked up "feminine" tics as a defence mechanism. They didn't help, but now I can't seem to get rid of them because they're habit. I hate what they remind me of and I hate how it makes people make assumptions about me, but I don't know how else to act. People say "Act like yourself," but it's not that easy when one has spent a good chunk of one's life being punished for acting like oneself and one has spent so many years learning how to act like someone else. Not to mention that, the more nervous I am around people, the more the defence mechanisms automatically come into play.
I'm getting there though. This is now more of an issue I was dealing with in the past. Confidence has helped a lot.