Good thread Grace!  Let's see:

January:  decided to transition and got bounced around a few endocrinologists until I found the right one.  Final birthday as a guy.  Does it mean that I'm going to be one year old in 2015 or should I start with 18?? 

February:  found a brilliant psychologst.  Because I'd done a whole bunch of therapy 20 years ago for this, we rocketed through the issues.  We now see each other once every couple of months.

March:  at dinner with a whole bunch of friends, I told them I was going to transition, and two of them piped up "Who's your endocrinologst?"  Like WTF! Turns out that one, who's a nurse, works in the psychology unit that collaborates with the gender identity clinic, and she pushed me to the front of the line.  How's that for luck.  Got enrolled in their formal program.

April:  what a month!! Actually  what a WEEK.  In the same one I started HRT, went out to get a bunch of female clothing, a wig, and a makeup artist friend of mine helped me buy waaaay too much good makeup.  On the Friday afternoon he showed me how to doll myself up, and threw me out into the late afternoon Madrid passeggiata, and nobody gave me strange looks.  Like wow!  Became a girl everywhere except at work.

May:  prepared a transition plan with HR at my company.  Went away as a girl with a whole bunch of friends for the first time.  It was great.  Started voice training classes and began to take a lot more care over how I moved and sounded.  Thank you BBC Radio 4 Women's Hour and Radio España!   Got misgendered a couple of times.  Told my family and was blown away by how positive they were, even though they were shocked at the beginning.  Mostly, they were indignant that I'd only involved them late in the process.

June:  took my local manager to lunch to tell him about my plans, and just as I was about to launch into my story he jumped in:  "<---->, I have a question for you... last week I think you came to the office with the remnants of mascara, and I'm sure that I saw you with some lipstick this week.  So, are you a nighttime transvestite???"  Well, I burst out laughing - it was an easy sell.  I'd actually been gradually feminising my appearance at the office, and as a "gay boy", it was noted but not commented on.   Turns out that although he is an engineer, he would have loved to be a psychologist.  Great support.  Came out after that to my close work colleagues with hugs all round.   Broke my arm when I fell off a bike.  Bummer!  This pesky little injury required an operation and months of physio.  It was easily more troublesome than anything transition-related. 

July:  wooo hooo, went full time!!   Sent an email to the people in my work ecosystem, and was astonished by the support.  Arrived at work and got mobbed by the women, and even a few guys came round to give me a hug.  Had some FFS done, and the difference was astonishing.  Started wearing dresses and loving it.

August:  a coolish summer in Madrid.  Recovering from FFS and working way too hard from home.  Ran a training course for a whole bunch of colleagues, and got support all round for The Girl.  Was told by a taxi driver that I had a sensual voice, and a friend I'd known for some years voiced some carnal intentions I never even expected.  A few checks in boxes this month!!

September:  went to some large group meetings at my company HQ.  Found myself unwittingly being used by an external motivational speaker at the meetings...as an example of the value of women in my company!  Huh!?   This, and the nature of the conversations I had with new people over dinner made me realise that I wasn't going to be able to use my notoriety as a boy-girl transcreature to my advantage:  people just saw a girl.  I know I'm incredibly lucky.

October:  Last use of my male passport flying in to the UK on the way to get my female-gendered passport.  No officer, this isn't my husband's passport - it's me!  So ended the weirdly surreal conversations I kept having at airport security.  What a grand day when my passport arrived!!

November:  just a girl going about her life.  Normality returning.  Quiet nights at home.

December:  goodness me, do I really have such a mass of my own hair now, and how did it go from being straight to having tight curls!?  Saw that I could finally abandon the wig (yay!) - it will look OK, but  has a way to go.   Had a hair transplant to fill in my temples.  That's now two massive scars I have in my hair - I swear I must be nuts!  Let's hope that a goodly number of follicles survive the experience.

Reflecting on 2014,  I have had the most weird and wonderful year.  I am humbled by the strength of support I have received from my family, friends and work colleagues.  In a modest way, I have begun helping other people in the trans community; many are having a complex time and I want to contribute positively so that their journeys are successful.  And thank you to my wonderful friends here at Susan's for your advice and support!

what a wonderful timeline Julia!

may I ask, what do you mean by voice training classes? are these specific classes for voice feminizing? Im intrigued

hmmmmm, a lot of boring months but.

January:
February:
March: had my accident in which i lost my vehicle, and went on disability for 4 months and went into debt.  knee surgery
March-June:  spent entire time on disability stuck at home. reconnected with some old online friends, started reflecting on my life and started becoming super depressed.
June: started talking to one of my old friends online about my questioning my gender, and wanting to be a girl. got some trans related papers sent to me.
July: yay happy birthday! ! !  another birthday spent alone without company.  returned to work.
August: started talking to a therapist.
September: my 1 coworker that i considered a friend flipped a 180 on me and we no longer talk.  managed to get caught up on all my normal monthly bills
September: came out to myself as being transgender, full realization that my being male is the main source of my long term (10yr+) depression and anxiety.
October: came out to 2 more of my close online friends, came out to my mom, stepdad, sister, and uncle. managed to pay off my hospital bill with the help of my work. (yay for associate in critical need fund)
September-December: research and planning for transition.
December: scheduled my appt with the hrt clinic for the end of february.

reflection:  my life went from being stable financially, and moving foreward but suffering from mild-moderate but manageable depression  to being almost 10k$ usd in total debt and being suicidal, to realizing the cause of my long term depression being caused by my hatred of being a guy to needing to transition to female, to being debt free, to working on starting my transition. to now, being somewhat happy as to the progress ive made, and wishing id totaled my truck sooner.

Thanks for sharing everyone, some great inspirational stories.

Late January-Early Feb -told a friend for the first time about my gender issues and she was very emphatic that I should see a therapist. I wasn't ready at the time and kind of let it go. It was first time I told anyone outside of family who in many cases already knew anyway.
March- She dies as a result of suicide and I finally start to faces my gender issues head on. I come out to a second friend.
April-May - I started researching what I need to do to transition and making the necessary plans and arrangements to do so.
May -  I came out to more friends and family via facebook and the phone.
June - Told my old primary care doctor, Had a karyotpe and hormone tests done. Switched to a new Primary care doctor and got the referral to the therapist. Started  switching from guy clothes to girls clothes while gradually sliding the scale over to more feminine items. Ears pierce and started wearing light makeup in public. The last time I used the guys restroom. Scheduled appointment for the therapist.
July- I saw the therapist for the first time and started Full time. Started working on my voice. Got the referral for the Endo even the final touches of the letter wouldn't be finished tell the First Friday in August. Legally got my name changed. Told my boss what was going on before she could ever call an ask wondering who that was. Good thing I did she said she had seen a few days after the call.
August- flipped flopped between 2 different endo's before settling on one. Gender marker and other legal documents were updated for my name and gender. Even though work already new my name and everything all work documents were changed over once all the legal documents were done. Started laser hair removal.
September- My first birthday as a female, saw the endo for the first time, and Started HRT. Started having hair removal in more than one area of the body.
October - Switched to IM Self injections and got my kidney doctor to finally okay Spiro. He had to sign off for the Endo to prescribe it do to concerns about how it would affect my potassium levels.
November- Started Spiro and continued enjoyed my life as a female. Weekly blood work as part of the deal to get the doctor to sign off proves what I already knew. Spiro wouldn't be a problem.
December- Started to get into a relationship for the first time in my life and even though he had no clue and I told him everything. I was shocked to learn that he didn't have a problem with it and was okay with it and was more opened to than I would have ever believed.

Gosh.... It's been such a big year that I have VERY mixed feelings about.....

* Started the year picking up the pieces of my life having left a two year relationship at the end of last year. Perhaps the most important aspect? I came to the acceptance that there really was no running from the truth anymore. I needed to transition to continue to live.

* While extremely drunk after a party at a friend's place, I came out to one of my closest friends, the first person I'd told. He was absolutely brilliant and supportive and has been ever since.

He wasn't the first person that I'd confessed that I felt I was born in the wrong body to, but he was sure as heck the first that I told that I was actually going to something about it!

* Sought out a trans-friendly doctor and confessed everything to her. She referred me to a psychiatrist/gatekeeper for further evaluation and then....

* My father passed away in April. The last thing I expected when I came home was to find him on the floor, already several hrs gone. Needless to say the floor fell out of my world at that moment. I cancelled my upcoming appointments and the next few months would be a blur of tears, booze as I struggled like hell to cope.

The sick irony was that I was struggling to find a way to come out to him, which he probably would never have accepted because of his awful attitude to transpeople. His attitude was part of the reason I stayed closeted and tried to run from myself for quarter of a century after I realised who I really was.... I probably would've lost him anyway.

* Conversely, when I came out to my mother (again, while drunk) she was very understanding and supportive. She's still my number one supporter.

* Once I pulled myself together (some time around July/August), I made my big appointment again. It went swimmingly well and I got my pass to see an Endo in order to begin hormone treatment.

* So at this point, I'm feeling pretty good. Unfortunately, I was silly enough to show a little too much flair at work (thanks to my irresponsible desire to be myself) and got myself driven out of my job thanks to a rumour that was getting around work that I was trans and a new brainless jock boss who clearly did NOT approve of me. Despite the fact that the previous two bosses thought I was a great employee, if a little eccentric.... lol

* I would've gotten down in the dumps, but.... The following week (September 7 to be precise), I began hormone treatment. Suddenly it did't seem so bad to lose a job that I hated with every fibre of my being....

* Some time following that, I allowed my two closest friends to see me as Ally, instead of the disGUYse I'd been wearing all these years. They were receptive and even complimented me on my tasteful make-up job!

* Then one of the terrific girls on this here forum (Hi Gypsy!) helped me get a new job in November. Unfortunately it didn't last long.... I'm still not even sure what happened there, but I noticed the boss' attitude to me changed after I showed up to work dressed in my usual androgynous manner, rather than my work uniform.... Hey, it was too hot to wear the uni on the way to work and I got changed upon arrival... Yet, he got weird around me after that and my shifts dried up. Not hard to join the dots on that....

* And now? Well, I feel like a new person. I've lost a ton of weight and am in the best shape I've been in in years.... I'm showing more and more of myself to the world.... Indeed, yesterday, I went out in public dressed in a mixed gender outfit w/ femme make up (as opposed to goth make up, which I wore a lot in my younger days and on stage) for the first time ever!

* Next year looks like it's gonna be the best ever after this year's extreme ups and downs.... Bring it on!

PS - Somehow I forgot to mention tearing my rotator cuff in January, which rendered me incapable of doing my old role (though I was moved into admin where I kicked much butt, I I do say so myself!). The company's negligence caused the situation where it happened, and though they helped me rehab it, I think that once I was technically healthy, it was another contributing factor in getting me driven out the door. Got to love workplaces that "care about their staff's wellbeing" and are "friendly to diversity".... Pfft.... I hope they've had fun either falling way behind or paying three people to replace me. :p

Medical

May 19th     Recieved informed consent letter from therapist.

May 23rd     First visit with MD

June 24th     After a month of blood tests, twice she wanted to eliminate possibilities of a problem, my first script was called in.

June 25th     Perscription Filled, first day of hrt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   

June-Now     Dosages/Injection Cyles adjusted for determining tolerance and correctness.  Many blood tests, I mean many, but thats ok, she cares about my health as much as I do.

Accomplishments:  Slooowly learning makeup, gradually increasing femininity in clothing and the wearing of them, buying buying buying clothes....shoes....boots....freakin many thigh high socks    (Love Victoria's Secret/American Eagle/Sock Dreams etc.).  Going off deep end a few times here but pulled out each time.  I cry now.....cried the other day at the new Hunger Games movie/girlfriend looked over/she gave me a big grin/ more tears-with smile.  Freaking lots of chocolate  .
Some hoped for things are here and getting bigger.  Jeez, gotta stop, could go on on on on....    Damn Fine/Crazy/Happy Year.    Dani

Quote from: sonson on December 29, 2014, 10:29:04 AM
what a wonderful timeline Julia!

may I ask, what do you mean by voice training classes? are these specific classes for voice feminizing? Im intrigued

Hey Sonson, thanks!  I was exceptionally fortunate this year.

The voice training was actually not much more than singing classes. My psy recommended me a singing teacher, and she and I spent just under 3 months mostly singing scales and gradually pushing my range upwards.  I always had a gentle and smooth voice, so it's not like I went from baritone to soprano.  I just went from tenor to "something higher"  

I would say that a goodly part of my training was my own initiative,  from the radio, just listening to the way women speak, and parroting what they said and how they said it, also trying to match the pitch when it was within my range.  I did that with English and Spanish.  BBC Radio 4's "Women's Hour" was absolutely the best thing.  Not only is it brilliantly interesting and intelligent, but the main anchor, Jenny Murray, has quite a deep voice, and she served as a fantastic voice model.  But also, with such a variety of people on the programme, you start to realise what variation there is in women's voices, not just in terms of pitch, but also inflection.  And then, as your voice grows more supple, you find your range.  But it is tiring - took at least 6 months for me to be able to use my voice all day, so patience is also key 

2014.  Oh my god -- get ready for a crazy timeline.

January: Starting the summer prior, dysphoria that I had been feeling for a long time in a more latent manner started intensifying to the point that I found myself in the emergency room, urgent care, etc. due to anxiety attacks.  However, January was one of the few months in the past year in which I felt like I could manage my dysphoria without transitioning.

February - April: The feelings of control over my dysphoria started slipping away; I experienced an anxiety attack during one of my classes one day that rendered me unable to speak due to how powerful it was.  A few weeks later, I experienced yet another anxiety attack, and next thing I know, my college friend had brought me to the emergency room.  I knew that discerning that I was virilizing was what was causing these attacks, and it embarrassed me. 

May - June: I started abusing anabolic steroids and acting overly masculine as a way to deal with my dysphoria.  I spent an excessive amount of time lifting weights, and I had built myself up to 190 lbs.  People stopped me in public to ask me what my workout was.  I felt masculine overall, and I was 100% convinced that I had eradicated my gender dysphoria for good.

July: I was completely wrong.  The virilization I had brought upon myself backfired, and thus, July marked the beginning of hell for me.  I spent like this entire month either bent over the toilet puking, crying myself to sleep, or contemplating ways to kill myself.  I contacted a gender therapist to schedule an appointment.

August: I saw my gender therapist for the first time.  In three sessions, we had concluded the most obvious treatment for my dysphoria: transitioning.  There was a light at the end of my tunnel.

September: My gender therapist and I together wrote the letter, which we'd send to a doc specialized in treating trans people.  I saw the doctor later in September.  I started HRT in late-September of 2014.

October: Loving HRT... My college roommate inadvertently discovered my medication, researched it, and learned that I am trans.  This month, I came out to my sister, who took the liberty of telling my grandma, who took the liberty of telling my mom, who was so kind to tell like my entire hometown.  Who knows what they say about me, but they seem pretty accepting.

November: Continuing HRT; loving the effects.  I had dropped as low as 140 lbs at this point.  Nobody in my hometown recognized me when I came home for Thanksgiving from college.

December: Still on HRT; always will be.  Roommate and I were separated due to threats that he was imposing onto me... Everyone and their mom now knows that I am trans... This was the first month that someone gendered me as female, and it gave me so much hope since I don't present as such yet.  I like who I am now, and am excited about who I will hopefully become.  My mom's acceptance has really shined through, as she bought me female clothing for Christmas, and is driving me to the doc for our second appointment here in a few hours.  I'm excited to hopefully switch from estrogen pills to injections.  I am ready for 2015.

Quote from: Julia-Madrid on December 30, 2014, 01:16:08 AM
Hey Sonson, thanks!  I was exceptionally fortunate this year.

The voice training was actually not much more than singing classes. My psy recommended me a singing teacher, and she and I spent just under 3 months mostly singing scales and gradually pushing my range upwards.  I always had a gentle and smooth voice, so it's not like I went from baritone to soprano.  I just went from tenor to "something higher"  

I would say that a goodly part of my training was my own initiative,  from the radio, just listening to the way women speak, and parroting what they said and how they said it, also trying to match the pitch when it was within my range.  I did that with English and Spanish.  BBC Radio 4's "Women's Hour" was absolutely the best thing.  Not only is it brilliantly interesting and intelligent, but the main anchor, Jenny Murray, has quite a deep voice, and she served as a fantastic voice model.  But also, with such a variety of people on the programme, you start to realise what variation there is in women's voices, not just in terms of pitch, but also inflection.  And then, as your voice grows more supple, you find your range.  But it is tiring - took at least 6 months for me to be able to use my voice all day, so patience is also key 

Ah I see, very cool!

I actually was attempting to mimic a woman on the radio while driving today, so I guess Im already in training 
My voice still sounds very low to me, but I know real progress doesnt happen overnight so I'll try to be patient and stay optimistic. Im definitely gonna have to start trying this with Women's Hour, thank you for the recommendation!

Mmm may be a bit different.

Got accepted for GRS, no probs.

Organised a massive transgender conference and nearly died (literally) from exhaustion.

Lost Nero; I still cry.

Did television and radio interviews - great fun! Got stopped in the street by total strangers - are you the woman I saw on TV last night? You rock!  Hugs people you rock too!!

Went broke and had to face the fact that I could not afford GRS, or run my charity.
Faced the fact that I also never give up; worked my arse off and can now afford GRS and run my charity organisation.

Met some of the most awesome, beautiful, fantastic people - parents of transkids, who love their new daughters and sons.

My wife telling me that if she had realised how much transitioning had made me into a different and happy person she would have insisted I transition 30 years ago.

Running this site for the only family who has ever accepted me.

I love you.

Oh and the best part, being me.

Cindy

You should be so proud Cindy of this year.
You have been amazing.

I hope 2015 brings you everything you ever wanted and you become you.

2014 was interesting for me.
E even in low dosage has done wonders. Make me feel like my body has been craving it for all those years.
I now have solid boobage that fills a C cup to the point of overflowing.
Fat transfer has and is happening and I have junk in the trunk.
Skin is wonderfully soft and a real turn on. I was not expecting that. How do others feel?
Dr is happy with bloodwork and it has been stable for 12 months now.

One big thing from 2014 is I will never go back.

While I do want the changes to continue I am terrified but also exited.

I spent a month in Manila which I didn't want to do for work but I made wonderful friends who love me.
Work is another story.

I still need to sum up the courage with Aunty Cindy's help to go shopping to be me.
I feel down presenting in guy mode for work.

For me overall it was a good year...

The year started in January  with me getting SRS.. so the rest of the the first quarter of the year, was me healing and dilating... April I went back to work full time.. (I am a partner in a clothing business, so during my recovery time i did light duty from home).

In May I got a tattoo on my lower back  and I got my 3rd set of holes pierced in my ears to represent my completed transition... (first set of holes, was me acceptance of transgender, second set of holes was full time and starting hormones)..  also in May i went for my first Gynecologist appointment.. that was not a bad experience, but i was scared before going. I doc was very happy with my healing. I went in November again for a checkup and a pap smear to check for infection.. and she also did a breast exam (no lumps).. and I will go in May again.. and then i will only need to go for yearly checkup like cis-woman do.

July I was bridesmaid in my friends wedding.. i loved my dress..  also in July i lost my virginity as a woman...

August I got a second tattoo done... this time on my lower stomach above my ladies parts... the tat is two dolphins facing jumping down to dive.. I know there will be more tattoos to follow, got like 3 in planning.. All my tattoos will be small.

October I met my boyfriend.. and started dating  .. before Christmas we said the L word to each other.... thats love you ... for those who don't get it...

November I got my left ear cartilage  pierced

2014 has been my "moving" year.  It started slow but I certainly made up for it from July onwards!

Jan to July - continued electrolysis, therapy with Psychologist and Psychiatrist (3-monthly), voice therapy and planning the next moves.

1 July - letter to boss explaining my desire to transition at work.  Engaged with HR and planned it for November.  No rush!  Name change process started and finished. Got new passport as Emma marked as F.

July onwards - spending every weekend as Emma, work days in old wrapping!

1 August - booked FFS and arranged for 6 weeks leave at end of the year. 

Sept - enrolled in a radio course at a LGBTIQ community radio station, a very safe environment and fun too.

Oct - surprise, needed a nose operation to remove polyps.  5 weeks before FFS which wasn't ideal!  Came out to brothers and sisters.  Very supportive and welcoming of their new sister.

Nov 18 - had meeting with work colleagues to announce my transition and why.  Overwhelming support.
Nov 19 - last day as the old me.  Frantically trying to finish work for the year!
Nov 20 - FULL TIME  - Fly to Mexico as Emma
Nov 21 - meet surgeon, agree on procedures
Nov 22 - 9am in operating theatre, everyone speaking Spanish (which I don't), so very very ALONE!  Second general anaesthetic in 5 weeks - feel like ->-bleeped-<-!  Met some wonderful girls in Guadalajara.
Dec 5 - Arrived home, bruised, swollen and exhausted.  Passport no longer looks like me!  Questioned about it at each border but no trouble.
Rest of Dec - healing slowly, buying more clothes and shoes. And more hair!
Dec 25 - Christmas alone for the first time in 52 years.  Nobody's fault, just a family situation my wife and son needed to cover.  Christmas dinner was a ham sandwich!

Today - nails done professionally for the first time.  Magic
Tomorrow - ears pierced!

The year started with me not really knowing where I was heading.  By July, the journey started to have real direction which made a huge difference to me.  Biggest change is how I now don't focus on ticking boxes but instead, I enjoy the journey itself.

2015?  FFS results become clearer as I heal, effects of HRT continue to show, get into living as a girl and start planning for GRS.  Bring it on!

Thanks to everyone who shares here, and Grace and Cindy in particular - the Aussie perspective has been very helpful. 

Happy New Year everyone. 

Emma

Wow, it seems many of us have had a parallel year!


Jan-2014
3 years private crossdressing and 'pretending' to be a girl online came to a head, had a nasty relapse of generalized anxiety. Commenced two months break from work, at the cost of 5 years' leave.


Feb-
The secret is out when my GP goes to program a psychiatrists number into my phone, while I go through his tissue box. GP looks up from my phone, 'Who is Sarah?'.

I tell him that I crossdress, but it is nothing unusual. He becomes concerned that I am going bipolar. It begins to look like I will be kept off work.


Mar-
Desperate to return to work, I write thousands of words, explaining how I understand my anxiety (family). I also decide to be open about my gender issues.

I take pains to explain that my anxiety and gender are unrelated, and that is a part of myself I am *actually happy* with. I really just want to be cleared to go back to work.

My GP does something unexpected once he has read my essays. He went out of his way to find the best gender specialists he could. My GP has known me for a long time ... I guess we trust each other ...

Appointments are made. I start to feel excited about my future - which was such a contrast to the daily dread I knew.

I am also cleared to return to work.


Apr-
While trying hard to redeem my absence at work, another side returns to my life.

I have long been spiritual, but I've floated from idea to idea.

As I became more driven to make things work with my gender issues, I also realised that I would be doing it alone - without family.

My 'dysphoria' was at its worst. When I would see pretty brunette girls on the bus - who looked how I saw myself- it would make me cry without fail.

I began going to the big catholic church in our city. A beautiful place. Calm, airy, cool, beautiful artwork.

I prayed my heart out. Surrendered everything I had. Cried a lot.

But I felt safe.

And every day I felt stronger and stronger.

So it was with much gratitude that I was baptised Catholic in the coming Easter. I even told them that I was trans, or at least going that way. They accepted me regardless. I felt supported and renewed.

I was ready to go.


May-
My psychiatric and endoc appointments roll through. I pass every one with flying colours. My doctors seem to be doing everything they can to fast track me. They believe I am real.

I worked hard for it, but nonetheless I was overjoyed.

My confidence hit a new high.

It was then that I decided to approach work.


June-
After a month's wait of HR and my boss trying to make a brand new policy for me ... I am finally 'full-time'.

I also begin my rebirth thanks to the correction of my hormones.

I write a beautiful letter to my parents explaining everything, that of course I love them, and that I'd love to see them again when its a good time.

We haven't spoken since.

But it's ok. I have known this was coming for ... so long.


July-
My work stability is shaken up, just as I am going through the first uncomfortable months of transition.

My employers are downsizing. Hundreds of people in my role have to go.

I wasn't going to lie down though.

I put up a big fight. Put out a clear case why I should stay.

I won. I am now one of the only ones left standing. My office girl career is now secure.

My boss, who was beginning to worry about me and have doubts ... looked at me with a new respect.

I have never been more proud.


Aug-Sep-Oct-Nov
Ongoing mental breakthroughs, detaching myself from one hangup at a time.

Feeling an increasing sense of well-being, having people say I look healthy.

Not 'passing' by a long stretch, but reconciling that, being kind to myself.

And every day more hidden sides to my personality come to the surface. I feel I can express myself with increasing honesty.

People come to accept me more and more, work begin to forget the old me, everything becomes to click ... because I feel 'right'


Dec-
I now feel 'real'.

Not even concerned about 'passing' anymore. Not in any hurry.

Being me - at last - and feeling free ... has been the greatest achievement of all.

Realizing attitude is everthing - and that if *I* feel right, people will also feel *right* around me.

And now, as the year ends ... I'm beginning to feel ready to take it even further.

---

12 months to completely transform a life.

I never thought it would be me.

Good luck to all of you ... lets have a wild 2015!

Early 2014:
Lingering dysphoria kicks into high gear for some reason. Started dressing in private more and more. Took some low dose E, I felt better for some reason?

Summer 2014: Dressing is now a daily occurrence. I spend hours doing it. All my spare time basically. Again tried some low dose E with dr's monitoring. Joined Susan's after being a long time lurker.

September 2014: another year in my life, gone. Feeling down and out. What's wrong with me? Began to figure that I really do need to seek help for this. Began doing small things, shaping my brows etc. wife notices, she freaks out. Started buying clothes to dress in.

October 2014: Came out to my wife. She did not take it well at all. Started therapy with first therapist.  Started electrolysis. Began to look at options for HRT.  Came out to HR at work! Started hitting the gym hard. Full time at home.

November 2014: What a month! First therapist says she was ending her in person practice and doing Skype only. Found a new therapist who has been positively awesome. First outings in girl mode. It was great! Kept adding more clothes to my wardrobe. Came out to my immediate team members. Hitting the gym and losing weight. Met up with Sydney who gave me lots of good advice.

December: HRT!!! Came out to my manager the same day. More outings in girl mode. Going to work partially dressed as a woman (androgynous) more often than not. Always in girl mode for therapy and dr visits. Contacted Yeson to see if I'm a good candidate. More and more electrolysis. HRT is making me grow real good too! Sent my dad the coming out letter drafted with my therapist's advice. Mom will get hers beginning of the new year. Once I'm out to mom and dad I'm going to tell some more people I trust and prepare for full time, name and gender market change and coming out at work. Also hope to have the facial hair down to a manageable level.

I'm horrible with memory but I'll give this a shot anyways!

January - Not out to anybody about my gender feelings, it was beginning to get quite hard for me to keep it in, dysphoria is really starting to kick in. I use to think about it quite regularly but at this point it's 24/7.


February - I told my best online friend about my feelings. He didn't really have anything new to tell me but he was supportive of me. It helped just to have someone know but that feeling didn't really last too long.


March - Came out to my best friend Jess. She was very helpful and her positive reaction about it and support really helped me so much, I really owe her a lot for that! We talked about it for like 2 hours before realizing we were late to meet some friends afterwards. While with our friends she even started referring to me with female pronouns, which I just wanted to cry about and hug her, it made me so happy! Nobody else picked up on it though which I'm glad of haha


April - A couple of weeks after coming out to Jess I came out to my other best friend Paul. He was really supportive about it and at this point is probably joint with Jess in being the closest friends I have ever had.


May - Upper 6th (final year of High School) exams. I was really stressed out at this point and had no idea what I could do. My emotional state really began to take a toll on my revision; in retrospect I should have said something to my parents by this point or a teacher. I didn't talk to Jess or Paul about it because I knew the two of them would want to be concentrating on revision and exams, so I didn't want to bother them with my problems.


June - Talked to my favourite teacher in school about my gender issues. He was extremely helpful and supportive for me! I had to keep making excuses to get my parents to drive me into school, since I didn't really have any reason to go in. They stated getting a bit suspicious.


July - Summer holidays. I couldn't go back in to talk to the English teacher as he was away on holiday by this point too and I didn't have his e-mail or anything to contact him. I took his advice that I had to do something about it before I emotionally crash from not saying anything and decided to come out to my mum. She was really accepting of it and just wants me to be happy. She came out to my dad for me to get a better reaction.
My dad is very old fashioned and isn't exactly knowledgeable about anything outside of Christian / Straight. She must have explained it very well as he came into my room and just hugged me, started explaining how there are professionals out there who can help me. He doesn't understand it though but he does support me..


August - BUCK 2014. The UK convention for Bronies and fans of the show My Little Pony Friendship is Magic. I was more social this time after talking to nobody in the previous year's con and had one of the best weekends of my life! It was such a fun and friendly atmosphere and I decided to treat myself with the money I hadn't spent yet, so I bought a large hand-made with love plushie of Rarity (my favourite pony .3.) and I love it so much! It was a really good price too! I met up with some people from a UK brony forum and made some friends in the madness of the con!

In late August I went on a holiday to France with my parents, my older sister, my older brother and his girlfriend. I hadn't seen my brother in months at this point. He lives over in England with his girlfriend so I rarely see him anymore. My mum and I decided it would be best if I came out to him at some point in the holiday in person rather than over e-mail or text or anything. My brother being my brother, was very inquisitive about it. He was accepting of it and supportive, but mostly just kept asking more questions haha. Later on he talked to his girlfriend about it and she was also supportive (I felt so lucky that all of my family and friends have been supportive at this point). The next day they took me to a coffee shop and I felt like I was on a Q&A talk show haha, questions galore!

September - I had a break down in front of my sister about a misunderstanding with my dad. At this point I couldn't explain my break down to my sister without coming out so I had to tell herShe gave me more realistic advice and told me that it will be difficult for our dad to understand and accept it, but focused on calming me down at the time. She really handled it well, haha
Registered for these forums!

October - Started uni by this point, taking a course on Computer Game Modelling and Animation. I have no friends and mostly just mind my own business. Sit by myself in classes, do all of my own work. Turtle mode activate.
I really wanted to go back to my high school and thank my English teacher for his help. Without him I wouldn't have come out by this point. He had taken an offer to become one of the head teachers in another (better) school so wasn't working at the high school anymore, and I didn't have any e-mail I could contact him with.
I signed up for Amazon Prime free trial and went shopping for myself for some new female clothes using my money that was supposed to be for university living. I was so happy with what I bought. I loved the wig I bought so much, when I first put it on I just broke down in tears; I actually looked somewhat feminine with it on and was so happy I bought it!
Later on my mum had to tell my oldest sister about me, she was the only one who didn't know. She didn't take it well. She got extremely upset which then in turn got me very upset as well, I'd rather not talk about it again however.

November - Settled into university now. Somehow became friends with a group of 3 guys in one of my classes and am kind of "one of the group" now.
I've joined the LGBT society within the university and made some new friends there.  One friend I didn't really want to make, but I am thankful to him as he introduced me to a project within the city called Rainbow (LGBT and allies). I went with him to sign up to become a member and I am so glad I did. I love all of the people there, everyone is so friendly with each other! (apart from the friend. He talks behind peoples back quite a bit). They really have helped me keep a stable mind and emotional state. If I'm ever feeling down or sad I can just walk down there and chill out with the people there, have a cup of tea and just chat. It's so relaxing.
Finally started dressing "en femme" outside of my room. I started attending LGBT society meetings with the wig on and eventually bought myself a bodyshaper, bra and inserts. They were really accepting of it and it made me so happy!
Started going to therapy at a GIC as well. Haven't gotten really into trans issues yet, just focusing on generalities and my mental health at this point.

December - Presented as female at Rainbow for the first time. I hadn't actually told anyone if I was gay or trans or anything so it came as a bit of a surprise to them, but they reacted the same way as the society people did! They acted the same around me and just complimented me! Some people didn't even recognise me at first! At this point I have made a lot of new and very dear friends in that project and I am so thankful for all of them! They really helped me to build my confidence and introduced me to a transgender group. All of the people in that project have really changed my life recently and made me happier as a person! So glad I met them all

And to finish off the year, I went on a family holiday to Walt Disney World in Florida. Me, my mum, my dad, my older sister, my older brother and his girlfriend and my oldest sister and her fiancé. It was absolutely fantastic to have the entire family there and was one of the best times there yet! I could go on about the holiday but I won't because I just realised how long this post is!

So it turns out if I just start writing small things I remember, I end up remembering too much! I had to cut this post down by like 3/4 to stop it from being a huge wall of text! haha!
Tons of ups and downs this year but at least I can say I finally did something about my gender issues! Something I hadn't been doing for over a decade (I still feel like I left it far too late at 19 though, really wish I had said something when I was younger)

OK.  Year ends in another day and it's time for us to say what's happened.  No fair saying anything about the future since it's all so fluid.

Me.
Almost 2 years, 6 months on Prescribed hrt.

About 17 months full time, and first full year with the proper name and gender on my Drivers License, and birth certificate.

Informally separated from my wife and lived in Michigan 9 months this year. But spent 3 random months as a guest in my wife's house.

Had my final increase in the Estrogen injections, and feel absolutely great.

My wife's brother died in California at the age of 55.  That night (12 hrs before hearing about his passing) I felt a very unfriendly presence in my room in Michigan.  It was as if somebody said goodbye, and warned me to be good to people at the same time.  Can't explain it further.

On April 11, I was approved by my doctor, psychiatrist, and gender therapist to seek surgery.

Found a girlfriend who's also trans, and we had a wonderful times. 

Left my girlfriend behind in California when I returned to Michigan by way of Arizona on November 4.  Have to fix a house. 

On November 5 I had my consult with Dr Meltzer for surgery, and recieved a new birthday (September 24, 2015).   

Discovered I'm self-destructive when I'm away from the girl I'm falling for.  (Gamble, procrastinate on critical work, and over eat.)

And finally. Began separating the property JoAnn and I own.  I'm ending up with about 1/4 of what she's getting out of this.     She
keeps the good stuff, I'm getting the old, broken, or expensive to repair stuff. 

That's it.  Been a good year overall.

Spring- In March, I came out to girlfriend of the time and started to seek out counseling. Started to dress part-time.

Summer- Saw my doctor for the first time and got started on hormones on June 23rd! Started coming out to closer family members and friends.

Fall- A little disappointed with my girlfriend, I went off hormones for about 3 weeks, and then resumed secretly as to not let my girlfriend know. She was being very hurtful and I decided it was time to call it off. Doctor also cut my dose by .5mg of estradiol due to very high estrogen levels in lab results.

Winter- A couple days before Christmas, I moved to Montana to live with my family and am living full time now, although I haven't been able to have my gender markers changed yet.  Been so happy since I came here!

Wow! For a lot of us I see it has been a productive year!

Here is my breakdown:

January-August: Biding time; trying to content myself with the fact I'm graduating in two more semesters, and have a job lined up! (the one I currently work for part time!)

September: Come out to my work's LGBT networking forum, they speak on my behalf with HR
October: Come out to some coworkers I trust. Gain a lot of support
November: Come out to my bosses, who are overwhelmingly supportive
December: (the BIG one)
* Came out to the remainder of my family that didn't know, who reacted all over the spectrum, but the ones who matter loved me and accepted me.
* After saving my pennies for years got FFS done on the 18th, currently waiting for the swelling to go down!
* Have a hair/eyebrow appointment scheduled, and should be full time by the end of the year! Will be returning to both school and work as myself on January 12th!

So, as you can see, I'M RIGHT THERE LADIES!!!!! Oh god, it has been a good year, I have been extremely blessed.