Funny story... when I got my birth certificate when I was eighteen, my name on it was wrong... or rather, my parents had been calling me, and everyone had been calling me something different for my whole life... it was something of a shock. Both parents blame the other one, and I still don't really know how that happened.

Anyway... when I went to go get my driver's license, even though all of my IDs except my birth certificate said the one name, they wouldn't give it to me with the name I've always gone by, so I had to pay to legally get it changed. I almost got thrown out of the registry too, because I refused to swear on the bible, and offered to swear on peter pan... and when I was asked for a non-family member to vouch for who I was, I said that that didn't make any sense, because if they have no way to know that they must know who I am, like they do with a family member, that I could just go pay some homeless person to claim to have known me for five years. Quickly following that up with "not that I'm going to do that"...

When it finally was said and done, they left out my middle name, and I had to get them to do it again! Then they misspelled my middle name on my driver's license, which was itself something of an obstacle, and delay when I got my driver's license changed to a difference province...

Not looking forward to that again...

I happen to like my name and wouldn't change it. It fits me. My mother always had a hard time with girls being called  'Kelly'. Well, Mom, guess what!  I will at some point change my middle name as it is truly meant for a male. I have considered and Irish name with the same first initial. This would make my ID similar to what I have now.

What makes a name "right"? I, unfortunately, do not know the answer to this question. I thought about and experimented with names before coming out and I thought I'd found the "right" name about eleven times. I finally settled on Luca because it was unisex, but now I'm not crazy about it. I'm okay with Lucas, but it doesn't feel as comfortable and "right" as I thought I my chosen name would. I love names and have many that I'd like to go by, but they all feel awkward coming out of my mouth and/or the mouths of others. :b
Lucas is starting to feel more and more like my birth name (err, the nickname I went by before); as in, not a bad name, just not one that's particularly important to me. The only difference is that Lucas isn't annoying feminine and I like its meaning much more.

I'd love to go by Andrew, or Isaac, or Brady, or Max... but they just aren't my name, haha. I'm not sure how to explain it.

Most cis people do not like their name. But it is their name. Same with you in this case.

In my case as example, I used the feminine version of my name. Not a huge fan of it.. But it works, it feels somewhat close to me. If people say a name and you turn around, it works . If you want to think of a name with meaning again, get kids .

Quote from: Kirey on January 09, 2015, 08:05:24 PM
Most cis people do not like their name. But it is their name. Same with you in this case.

Agreed. Even before I knew I was transgender I hated my birthname and made everyone call me a nickname.

I needed to pick a new female name (long story).  I had been trying Catherine, and going by Cate.   Regal, age appropriate, and I would keep my first initial. 

So I've been playing around with my new name in my head to see if it's right.  I'm still presenting male though and I'm a ways off from transition.  But yesterday, when asked for my birth name, I almost said "Cate."  I guess that means it feels right!

What a way that would have been to come out to my wife!

I've thought along these lines myself. I agree it would be a tremendous hassle to go through all the legal name change red tape (again). Is it worse to go through all that, or occasionally be referred to as a name you're not too keen on anymore? I can't say I've conclusively answered that question myself, but I think that's what it comes down to. Especially in this day and age though, one need not be confined to a single name. Of course you will only have one legal name associated with you, but many people don't go by this day to day. Legal name I say is what the government calls me. Day to day at work and such I have my "common use name". Pretty much only HR knows that something else is on the legal records. I've got a bunch of online names. I've got a spiritual name. If/when I get any of my writing published I may end up have one or more pen names. Some writers are more well-known by their pen name than by their legal name (Mark Twain being an obvious example). Since I'm me, only I get to decide which ones are really me and which ones are just an administrative label.

You look like  Josh, I don't know if I chose the right name but it's not legally changed yet.

The name I used as a teen was overused and didn't fit me. My new name feels like coming home.

I chose one (and I use it at therapy and other places) but based on my mom's suggestions I'm going to go with one that she chose. I haven't done the legal name change yet, but I will do so soon.

I think you look 100% a Kevin. A good nick name for it is Kev. I was told the meaning of the name is "Beautiful".

Celtic Meaning:
The name Kevin is a Celtic baby name. In Celtic the meaning of the name Kevin is: Gentle.

American Meaning:
The name Kevin is an American baby name. In American the meaning of the name Kevin is: Gentle.

Gaelic Meaning:
The name Kevin is a Gaelic baby name. In Gaelic the meaning of the name Kevin is: Attractive.


Anglicized form of the Irish name Caoimhín, derived from the older Irish Cóemgein, composed of the Old Irish elements cóem "kind, gentle, handsome" and gein "birth". Saint Caoimhín established a monastery in Glendalough, Ireland in the 6th century and is the patron saint of Dublin.

Quote from: AbeLane on January 09, 2015, 08:17:21 PM
Agreed. Even before I knew I was transgender I hated my birthname and made everyone call me a nickname.

Same here. I lit up every time I heard my nickname.

Hey there :-)

I remember hating my old name to the point where I would cringe.  I identify/identified as non-binary for ages so even though I haven't started transitioning I have already done my name change both socially (two years ago) and legally (a year ago).  Both are so annoying, and I bet they're harder when you're older.  I still have to change my name on different things, like my passport, my tax file, etc. 

Personally I always REALLY liked the name Alex, but it was so common that it frankly would have been weird if I had chosen it.  I eventually came up with my current name (also beginning with A, also unisex) just browsing on the internet.  There's two forms of the name, both unisex but each one leaning one way on the gender spectrum (apparently).  I chose the more masculine one (because most people know me as a guy).  I guess I kind of regret that decision now, but it doesn't bother me at all because it's said in the same way and I prefer the look of it this way.  It's less "pretty" and more "me" hahaha.

I think it's important to like your name.  In my experience, people will also adapt quite quickly to a name change, within two years most of my friends have no recollection of my birth name.  OTHERS have no problem just saying it casually to a group which SUCKS. 

I think you look like a Kevin, but that's mostly because that's what your name currently is.  You can try different nicknames like Kev, Vinnie, etc.  People could also call you by your middle name or last name, that's a common thing.

I don't have a tattoo for many reasons, but the big one is the fact that I don't feel like there's anything so significant to me that I want scarred onto my body for life.

I wish names weren't like tattoos.  That we could just adopt the name that fits us for the moment, and not worry about being stuck with it for life.  And when it comes time to let it go, it's a simple form and done.  Not thins long, arduous procedure, like getting a tattoo removed.

guhhh Im so bad at picking names, for anything really. I'll spend an hour naming a character in a video game. how am i supposed to pick my own name?? im trying out gwen for now, and i like it, but... i feel like no matter what name i choose, I'll have doubts about it
ah well i'll probably go with gwen, i do like it 

Being that I am ok with my birth name, and slightly less so with the middle name, I wanted to find something that reflects that but masculinizes *me*. I did a lot of research and found a German spelling of the name mine derives from. (Laurence -> Lorenz, Laurie -> Lori) I also liked the change because those who really couldn't deal with the transition would still be able to call me by a nickname that *fits*. (Bonus for me is I barely have to edit my signature at all).

For my middle name, I stuck fairly close, but chose Theodor instead of Theresa. I like the sound of it more than the original and both names pay homage to my German background. Theodor also speaks to me of my own desire to love God, as I come from a fairly indepth place of faith - even if I argue with God about most things and look and God going.... "REALLY?! Now adding This too? Gee... what else you gonna throw at me?"

So, from Lori Theresa to Lorenz Theodor I shall be when I can finally move to that point of transition.

As to you.... I'd say Peter, because you have that mischief in your smile that reminds me of the great and wonderful Peter Pan (Or perhaps Robin, as homage to the man I think best portrayed that particular eternal youth).

Quote from: IAmDariaQuinn on January 11, 2015, 11:56:06 PM
I don't have a tattoo for many reasons, but the big one is the fact that I don't feel like there's anything so significant to me that I want scarred onto my body for life.

I wish names weren't like tattoos.  That we could just adopt the name that fits us for the moment, and not worry about being stuck with it for life.  And when it comes time to let it go, it's a simple form and done.  Not thins long, arduous procedure, like getting a tattoo removed.

That's an interesting comparison to draw - I agree completely! It makes sense to me that a name should fit you at certain points in your life, and perhaps a new stage of life or maturity could warrant a new name. My current name feels like me as a teenager, because I chose it when I was 15.

I also couldn't get a tattoo for the same reasons.

I decided to go with the name my parents had picked out for me (Lisa) when the doctor told them they were having a girl. It's not a name I would have chosen for myself (Elizabeth is my favorite girl name), but it has a lot more significance as it was the name I would have been given had I been born with the correct parts. I took the feminine version of my birth name as a second (actually first since I placed it before the middle name my parents had picked) middle name and have toyed with the idea of adding Charlotte (a girl name I like that flows well with the rest of my name) as an additional middle name.

Quote from: Elsa Delyth on January 09, 2015, 04:07:45 PMI almost got thrown out of the registry too, because I refused to swear on the bible, and offered to swear on peter pan...

Wait, where do you live, where they make you swear on the Bible to change your name? I live in Pennsylvania, and I didn't have to do such a thing.

I'm fortunate that my boy name fit me very well as a boy, and my girl name fits me very well as a girl. My mom chose both of them. Boy, does she know me! Thanks, Mom!

The name I chose is the name I used for my characters in MMOs for years.  I'm already conditioned to respond to it from being called it on voice comms and it fits me perfectly.  I get a ton of comments on how pretty and unique it is, but its rareness can be a disadvantage.  I am loathe to use it on here and other online communities, for example, because I would be really easy to find.  I came up with the name, kind of by accident.  When I made my first character, I was having problems coming up with a name that wasn't already being used, so I typed in the name of a childhood friend whose name I really liked and is unique.  Right after doing that I felt like using my friend's name was wrong and kind of creepy, so I modified it to something I liked better.  As it turns out, my name is not unique but is extremely rare.

My birth name is common and obviously male.  When I was in school, I had a lot of problems associating that name with me, and when teachers would call me it, I wouldn't respond.  Eventually, in my 20's, I learned to respond to my birth name, but there was always a delay where my brain would have to consciously respond to it.  It is *so* freeing to have a name that I feel is absolutely perfect for me.