Having had some real life intimacy experience, I ran into some issues physically.

Currently I can take a 1.5 wide dilator, which is 3.8cm - 4cm in diameter. Problem is, some guys have bigger girth... It takes about 10-15 minutes to work up to the widest dilator of 1.5 inch. When I had intimacy with a guy, I did not lubricate it (forgot) and I did not dilate for at least 8 hours. So, it became somewhat problematic. It didn't went in far enough, maybe 2 inches or so.

Now what I notice with dilating, I need to relax the muscle to take in 1.5 inch. I really have to feel comfortable, which I did not do while being intimate with a guy.

So do I need to dilate more? (just 7 weeks post-op) or do I need to learn to relax the PC muscle?

This is all so new to me, and I am really looking for some answers...

Here is the best thing I can say, keep up with the dilations they are so super important for the first year, what I did during my dilation regimen (ask your dr before you decide on something new) is I twisted and sometimes swayed it side to side and up in down. it helped loosed up the pc muscle, but since you are pretty fresh I'd be careful. also right before I decided it was "time" I did a quick 10-15 minute dilation. and even then it hurt still, and yes I bled ,but afterward it got all better actually great so I suppose I had to break in a lil. I relate that first time to probably like a virgin first time, it hurt for a lil bit, bled, but got better, and remember lube!

Thanks! preparing with some minor dilation beforehand is a good idea, I'll try it next time. 

What I do now for dilation is instead of laying on my back to dilate, I spread my legs open and go on top of the dilator like how you'd ride a guy cowboy style on top of him.

Then I slowly push down, gradually going in and out till it goes in and in different angles till I feel it's the right angle to have the dilator go in. Once I do that, it's almost full in, then I stand up, try to push the dilator in more then I use panties to hold the dilator in and walk carefully around the house, and carefully not bending too much.

After 10 minutes, use my second dilator which still a little painful but is getting more loose doing the whole process but with dilator 2 in, since it's more wider, I'm more careful. I walk around with my panties holding it in and I adjust the dilator from time to time until it feels comfortable.

After 30 minutes, take it out then wait again to do it later throughout the day.

But everyone has a different way of dilating. I find the way I dilate more easier for me.

isnt it dilators are hard plastic material? how could you possible put it all in and walk around? Im using soulsource dilators.

I cant imagine myself walking around while mr green is inside >_<

Quote from: chinee05 on December 21, 2014, 06:44:23 PM
isnt it dilators are hard plastic material? how could you possible put it all in and walk around? Im using soulsource dilators.

I cant imagine myself walking around while mr green is inside >_<

I did once. It was not comfortable, but I was able to get it to stay in.

Quote from: suzifrommd on December 22, 2014, 08:50:45 AM
I did once. It was not comfortable, but I was able to get it to stay in.

But wouldnt that damage or cause tear the vaginal canal inside?

Very early in the process when there is stitches and everything is healing it very well could.  I have dilated in the shower before and while doing makeup but not until all the stitches are gone. 

At nearly 6 months I'm stuck with Mr Green and honestly think that that is the limit of my width due to the relative narrowness of my sit bones.Depth is a bit of an issue too.With my legs apart knees bent Mr Blue goes to 4 inches(at the front).Still,sensation and cosmetically all is good.I had my surgery with Dr Saran back in July.He doesn't dissect the peritoneal reflection and so  depth achievable is limited by your anatomy.

don't use a smooth hard plastic dilator as supplied by surgeons as they cause 'stiction' which is sticking and friction due to the smoothness pushing lube away and then sticking to the flesh.

get a dilator or dildo with long shallow grooove/wavy line running along its length as this will not push away th elube and will go in and out easily.
And one it is in try wiggle it up down, left right to really stretch the new scar tissue inside.

Woh, only 7 weeks post-op. Slow down!!!

Things will get looser over time as long as you are diligent regarding your dilation. In my experience you do go through a period of of tightening (around the 6 week mark) and it can be a real fight. But once you get through that things settle down.

Dilating just before sex can also make things soo much easier, just bring your dilators along

yikes. 
  ok,  from  an  older  girls  stand  point. 
first,  there  was  one  huge  err  in  the  op's  plan  for  intamacy. 
  anytime  you  are  going  into  a  situation  where  intamacy,  and  sexual  activity  is possable,  you  must  carry  lube. 
  in  all  the  years,  with  all  the  girls  ive  talked  wih,  lube  is  essential.  it  aint  gonna  be  pleasureable  without  it. 
  check  at  your  local  pharmacy,  they  sell  single  use  packets  of  lube  that  easily  carry  in  purse  or  pocket.  stash  a  few  in  the  car,  the  purse,  etc.   
  a  great  time  to  apply  is  when  he  is  putting  on  his  condom.    PLEASE,  dont  go  there  if  hes  not  weraring  one.  we  are  just  as  likely  to  contact  STD's  as  any  other  girl.  also    it  greatly  increases  the  chances  of  a  bacterial  infection,  and  makes  clean  up  much  harder  if  hes  not  sporting  a  rain  coat. 
  Early  on  in  my  post  life,  lube  in  place,  an  extra  setting  near  by,  i  would  have  previously  made  sure  he  knew  about  me,  and  at  that  moment,  I  would  remind  him  .   some  of  my  lines  were,  '  be  gentle,  take  your  time,  its  not  broken  in  yet"  ,  OR,  "  its  scared,  so  go  easy  until  it  gets to  know  you". 
  i  learned  also,  that  though  a  guy  isnt  like  plastic,  and  the  penis  will  fit  even  if  a  bit bigger  then  the  dialiator,  there  is  a  point  where  i  say  no  way.  a  guys  size  can  hurt,  even  if  it  fits.  im  not  the  type  to  just  '  do  it'  to  make  him  happy,  while  I  lay  there  in  pain  or  extreme  discomfort.   ill   let  him  bitch  and  moan,    call  names,  what  ever, its  my  cooter,  its  my  call.   ... its not  like  you  can  measure  it  before  things  get  hot.  and when  that  critical  moment  arrives,  and  he  flops  out  something  that  resembles  a  Anaconda,  thats  as  thick  as  your  wrist,    you  have  to  make  the  call  thats  right  for  you. 
  never  be  afraid  to  say  "NO"
  a  lot  of  us  older  girls  also  only  got  6  inches  of  depth,  on  a  good  day.    so  all  the  above  applies  to  a  guys  length.  we  all  trust  them  to  respect  our  limits,  but  we  also  know how  that  can  go.    some  will  find  that  the  thicker  a  dialiator  is,  the  less  depth  they  realise.  that  applies  in  the  real  life  experiance  also.  in  time,  you  learn  to  guage  what  will  work,  be  comfortable,  and  safe.   

  bottom  line.  you  are  only  so  big,  so  deep. Part  of  the  sexual  equation  is  that  it  be  pleasurable  and  enjoyable  for  you  too.     lube  is  essential  so  carry  it  all  the  time,  and  understand  that  some  guys  may  just  be  too  big  for  you.  there  is  no  shame  in  that,  or  in  saying  no  at  the  last  minute. Even  genetic females  will  tell  you  that.     only  you  can  protect  yourself  in  that  way,  and  as  for  condoms,  no  rain  coat,  no  play.  that  should  be  a  firm  rule  every  time. 

Quote from: lilredneckgirl on January 22, 2015, 06:25:47 AM
yikes.    7  weeks  post?  girl,    to  coin  some  phrases,  "  pump  your  brakes,  slow  your  roll"  .  your  pushin  it a  bit.  give  it  time  to  heal.  let  the  swelling  go  down.  then  learn  to  live  with  it,  emotionaly,  before  you  start  driving  it  around  the  block.  there  shouldnt  be  any  rush,  after  all,  its  yours  for  the  rest  of  your life.  remember,   "  with one  of ' these',  you  can  have  as  many  of  'them'  as  you  want.    it  aint  a  race...  its  a  journey...

  ok,  from  an  older  girls  stand  point. 
first,  there  was  one  huge  err  in  the  op's  plan  for  intamacy. 
  anytime  you  are  going  into  a  situation  where  intamacy,  and  sexual  activity  is possable,  you  must  carry  lube. 
  in  all  the  years,  with  all  the  girls  ive  talked  wih,  lube  is  essential.  it  aint  gonna  be  pleasureable  without  it. 
  check  at  your  local  pharmacy,  they  sell  single  use  packets  of  lube  that  easily  carry  in  purse  or  pocket.  stash  a  few  in  the  car,  the  purse,  etc.   
  a  great  time  to  apply  is  when  he  is  putting  on  his  condom.    PLEASE,  dont  go  there  if  hes  not  weraring  one.  we  are  just  as  likely  to  contact  STD's  as  any  other  girl.  also    it  greatly  increases  the  chances  of  a  bacterial  infection,  and  makes  clean  up  much  harder  if  hes  not  sporting  a  rain  coat. 
  Early  on  in  my  post  life,  lube  in  place,  an  extra  setting  near  by,  i  would  have  previously  made  sure  he  knew  about  me,  and  at  that  moment,  I  would  remind  him  .   some  of  my  lines  were,  '  be  gentle,  take  your  time,  its  not  broken  in  yet"  ,  OR,  "  its  scared,  so  go  easy  until  it  gets to  know  you". 
  i  learned  also,  that  though  a  guy  isnt  like  plastic,  and  the  penis  will  fit  even  if  a  bit bigger  then  the  dialiator,  there  is  a  point  where  i  say  no  way.  a  guys  size  can  hurt,  even  if  it  fits.  im  not  the  type  to  just  '  do  it'  to  make  him  happy,  while  I  lay  there  in  pain  or  extreme  discomfort.   ill   let  him  bitch  and  moan,    call  names,  what  ever, its  my  cooter,  its  my  call.   ... its not  like  you  can  measure  it  before  things  get  hot.  and when  that  critical  moment  arrives,  and  he  flops  out  something  that  resembles  a  Anaconda,  thats  as  thick  as  your  wrist,    you  have  to  make  the  call  thats  right  for  you. 
  never  be  afraid  to  say  "NO"
  a  lot  of  us  older  girls  also  only  got  6  inches  of  depth,  on  a  good  day.    so  all  the  above  applies  to  a  guys  length.  we  all  trust  them  to  respect  our  limits,  but  we  also  know how  that  can  go.    some  will  find  that  the  thicker  a  dialiator  is,  the  less  depth  they  realise.  that  applies  in  the  real  life  experiance  also.  in  time,  you  learn  to  guage  what  will  work,  be  comfortable,  and  safe.   

  bottom  line.  you  are  only  so  big,  so  deep. Part  of  the  sexual  equation  is  that  it  be  pleasurable  and  enjoyable  for  you  too.     lube  is  essential  so  carry  it  all  the  time,  and  understand  that  some  guys  may  just  be  too  big  for  you.  there  is  no  shame  in  that,  or  in  saying  no  at  the  last  minute. Even  genetic females  will  tell  you  that.     only  you  can  protect  yourself  in  that  way,  and  as  for  condoms,  no  rain  coat,  no  play.  that  should  be  a  firm  rule  every  time.

I agree. I have seen done guys that are hung like Bulls. I set the ground rules and if they break them they get nothing. Never let a guy be in total control of your body and put something into you that's to long or too wide

Hi,
I'm new in the forum. I'm a 31 years old post-op (from italy), had my surgery almost 11 years ago.
I saw this thread and I decided to reply here, but I can open a new one if necessary.

In the past I've sometimes experienced some pain during sexual intercourse and in the last few years I haven't had any sexual life, nor used any dilation tool.
(set aside the psychological, here, i'm now on psychotherapy and it's going better).
I'm gettin back on track, but i'm feeling discomfort using the vibrator and i'm afraid some "narrowing" occurred.
If this is the case, is regular "exercise" going to make it significantly better?
Or is any surgical procedure available to re-gain (or gain, in case the original surgery was not perfect) width/lenght?
If any of you have had the same experience or know something about it, please share

Thanks,
C.

Quote from: claumath on February 08, 2015, 09:12:33 AM
Hi,
I'm new in the forum. I'm a 31 years old post-op (from italy), had my surgery almost 11 years ago.
I saw this thread and I decided to reply here, but I can open a new one if necessary.

In the past I've sometimes experienced some pain during sexual intercourse and in the last few years I haven't had any sexual life, nor used any dilation tool.
(set aside the psychological, here, i'm now on psychotherapy and it's going better).
I'm gettin back on track, but i'm feeling discomfort using the vibrator and i'm afraid some "narrowing" occurred.
If this is the case, is regular "exercise" going to make it significantly better?
Or is any surgical procedure available to re-gain (or gain, in case the original surgery was not perfect) width/lenght?
If any of you have had the same experience or know something about it, please share

Thanks,
C.

Correct levels of estrogen, bioidentical progesterone (because of cross effects with estrogen... ) and even a very low level of testosterone might help.
There should be medical people with some kind of experience available... and many people said it helped.
With libido, and some say even depth . The tissue might react like that of a menopausal vagina. Of course there are no guarantees.
Pellets or topical might be a good way, avoiding spikes and possibly a low hours later like with oral. This also might affect mood.

You should continue dilation...
and there are surgical procedures to regain...

hugs