Ok so as i go along my transition trying to work my way though things my wife brings up something.  She wants to know what happens to our marriage if i go though and lets say get a name change and or change my official sex.  First i told her that i am not ever sure if i will get that far and had not thought much of it.   I told her first i still love her no matter what. 

Now i will say she is not a big fan of me and my transition but I think it is more of the fact that i lied to her and never told her about m thoughts and feeling 10 years ago when we got married.   I am still working with her on that issue and i understand that will take time to get better and or for her to forgive me if she ever does.  But on the assumption she   does forgive me and that she does stay with me.   We live in state of texas got married in texas.   So what would our legal status be if i changed my official sex?


Vicky
MtF

To add on to that.  I currently have a 401k that i have been saving money up in for retirement.   What would happen to that too.  I know right now she would get the money as long as we are married but if i did change my name/sex would the money still go to her?


Vicky
MtF

I live in Missouri and changed my first name and gender through the courts with a lawyer.  My wife was worried about the marriage recognition, too.  Despite Missouri not allowing same sex marriage, according to my lawyer our marriage is a contract that cannot be broken with such changes.  It remains intact.  I will either have to get it amended with my new first name (won't try the gender amendment just yet... ), or show my court order every time I get a new job and apply for spousal benefits, for instance.  I go to court next Monday to try and get my name changed on my children's birth certificates.

As for the 401k/pension, my spouse is automatically my beneficiary, according to the plan my work offers.  I specifically list her, too, but the last couple 401k and pension plans said if I didn't designate otherwise (and she has to sign to allow other designation) then the spouse remains the primary.

Having said all of that, you should still consult a legal representative from Texas to be sure, and contact your HR/Benefits dept. regarding the 401k.

Hope this info helps!
-Ainsley

Thanks. I plan on it later on but good to know it can work out still.


Vicky
MtF