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looking at men...

Started by Sabrina, February 11, 2015, 07:43:27 PM

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Sabrina

I just noticed yesterday while shopping that I started looking at men. This is a relatively new sensation for me. I've never really cared before or had any interest. It's exciting but scary. I'm afraid I'll attract the wrong crowd. I just got to be positive and see what happens :)
- Sabrina

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MelissaAnn

Sabrina,
I know just how you feel... I've always been attracted to women but within the last couple of months that attraction has changed. I was told that this could happen. The hard part for me is the letting go and letting it come naturally. It's hard not to think about am I gay now? No!!! Because I identify female because I am female I'm not gay. I'm just a little confused by it all right now. Anyway hag in there girl...

Kaydee

I have noticed that a few of my old guy friends are a lot cuter than I remember them being. It still surprises me each time I notice.  I'm not ready to explore that interest yet.  But once I am established in my new gender role it should be interesting,  I. too, find it more than a little confusing and scar right now.
Aimee





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AbbyKat

I'm kinda/sorta hoping this happens.  Just a little bit.  Not enough to make me want to actually pursue one (I'm happily married) but maybe just enough so I'll feel more "typical".  I know that's a horrible reason but that's the only one I can come up with.  Maybe there's just a part of me that's convinced my wife will still be attracted (at least a little bit) to males so perhaps I'm wanting to balance it out or something?  Or maybe I'm just planning ahead in case my wife wants to get experimental in the future.  I don't know.

For now, I can't stand to even see my own dude-suit parts in the mirror let alone somebody else's.  I guess I'll find out eventually.

As for you, hooray!  Finding reasons to think fondly of strangers is hard enough so any reason (even attraction) can be viewed as a positive thing.  It just makes you like even more people than you did before! 
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Tori

Totally happening to me too. Thankfully my wife is understanding. Understanding but not one to share. At least I have someone to talk to when a cute guy walks in.


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Joanne Feliz

Hi Tori,

do you not worry that you will stop being attracted to your wife completely and in the end separate?

I couldn't bear that happening, if that were to happen to me.
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Tori

Not really.

It just is what it is. I wasn't going to cheat on her with another woman. Now I won't cheat on her with another person.

More people to look at now. I am so physically attracted to women, and guys are just so clueless and cute. Different attractions, for now.

My wife understands my attractions are shifting. She understands if I need to explore. It will end our marriage if I do but not our bond and friendship.


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Audietta01

Hi,
My first post. I just went to my therapist for the 1st time. Have not started anything like my sisters here, but feel I must in order to feel whole.
Feeling ancient at 59. Since just admitting I realize men are my ideal partner. Everytime I go the grocery store one young man makes me smile inside and shyly outside. My partner of 14 years wants the old me but my true self broke the eggshell from the inside. And I, silly one, sigh and wish I could see him eat spagetti and hear him snore. Silly sad me

In order for my prinz to come so must I. That vacuum we all feel is as natural as blue skies, isn't it?
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Obfuskatie

And? Guys can be super hot, they can also be creepy and gross.  It's hard not to notice them and be intrigued by the arcane ways of men, at least in my humble opinion.
The best part is when they start notice you as well.  It can be a huge ego boost... unless they are creepy/gross.  Those times kinda nauseate me.  It's like, "Why is he staring at my chest?  Oh right, I have boobs now... Ugh, he's still staring..."


     Hugs,
- Katie
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk



If people are what they eat, I really need to stop eating such neurotic food  :icon_shakefist:
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Joanne Feliz

Is funny that, I do see some men that have all the classic features of uber-man-appeal like the strong, square jaw, strong forehead, muscles and you feel pretty inadequate next to these fine specimens of maleness especially when they are great at doing their job or anything else they do...not sure if i could get my head around being attracted to a man in that way even after going through transition.

Sometimes I find myself looking a bit too long at some attractive women because i am thinking I wish I was her. or had her body or admiring the good/sexy clothes i wish i could wear.  Must seem a little creepy if your caught looking

:D
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Mariah

Sabrina, as someone who wasn't attracted to anyone coming into this I wasn't ready at first for men to come to me or even be attracted to me. The interest in guys hit me like a brick wall a couple of months ago. I'm finding as I get further into my relationship with a guy that I'm getting comfortable doing and been seen doing different things that I would have even considered 4 months ago. As time goes on I'm noticing guys and how appealing I find them more and more which I took note of when I reading a magazine yesterday. I kept looking back at the ad with this amazing looking guy in it. If the wrong crowed does get drawn to you just firmly let them no your not interested and don't be afraid to say No. Regardless of what you do your safety is the most important thing. Hugs
Mariah
If you have any questions, please feel free to ask me.
[email]mariahsusans.orgstaff@yahoo.com[/email]
I am also spouse of a transgender person.
Retired News Administrator
Retired (S) Global Moderator
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katrinaw

Quote from: Audietta01 on February 12, 2015, 03:30:58 AM
Hi,
My first post. I just went to my therapist for the 1st time. Have not started anything like my sisters here, but feel I must in order to feel whole.
Feeling ancient at 59. Since just admittin
Re: Waist
« Reply #1 on: Today at 07:57:09 am »
Quoteg I realize men are my ideal partner. Everytime I go the grocery store one young man makes me smile inside and shyly outside. My partner of 14 years wants the old me but my true self broke the eggshell from the inside. And I, silly one, sigh and wish I could see him eat spagetti and hear him snore. Silly sad me

In order for my prinz to come so must I. That vacuum we all feel is as natural as blue skies, isn't it?

Welcome Audietta01 glad you joined the forum  :-*
I am just 2 more than you..

I can't say I have had an awakening as such, but I do notice men and have once or twice fantasized....

Boring Eh?

But on the other hand I look at women, mainly for fashion, mannerism's, makeup etc...

Hmmmm maybe It'll get better  ;)

L Katy  :-*
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Sabrina

Fortunately for me, my guy friends aren't my type. It would be kinda awkward. But I'm not sure exactly what my ideal type of man is. I'll know what my type is when I come across him :)
- Sabrina

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noleen111

Before hrt was only attracted to women.. as hrt took its hold and my body and mind changed and settled into life as woman I started looked at men in a different way.. maybe dating a man was not so ewww anymore.

I was scared, being a attracted to a man was one thing.. but would I be able to handle being held by one or even kissing him... Then a friend of a friend needed a date for a work function.. and my friend said.. why don't you take noleen as a friend. The evening went well.. and we kinda hit it off.. It was very weird at first been on date with man.. but it was nice too.. it felt right..we started dating.. and the first kiss and making out the first time and even sleeping with him was weird at first.. but again it felt nice and right. I was pre-op at this time and he was fine with it.. as he was kinda bi-sexual.. the relationship ran its cause..

after srs.. I met a wonderful guy, who now is my boyfriend.. i really love him and I love it when he holds me or kisses me on my neck. Sex is wonderful with him... I love being the female in the relationship.. i love when he buys me jewelry or just brings me flowers. I now a straight woman. the boys are yummy
Enjoying ride the hormones are giving me... finally becoming the woman I always knew I was
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ImagineKate

Yeah I am kind of attracted to men these days too, but I am very picky.

A guy friend of mine has gotten very friendly since I came out to him but I really don't want to get involved with him.

And I am not about to give up on our marriage with an extramarital affair, as tempting as it seems.
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Tessa James

Given that some of us repressed and/or denied our transgender truth isn't it reasonable that some have been equally good at repressing orientation??  Once we break down the walls and throw off the shame and guilt it would not surprise me that other discoveries can occur.  And, of course, orientation does not mean we must act on every acknowledged attraction or fear we are missing something.  I have been in a few loving and meaningful relationships with men.  What has been consistent is that I have usually imagined and quietly enjoyed myself as a girl.  Now I can be out about it all, what a relief!
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013
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Sammy

Quote from: Tessa James on February 12, 2015, 11:49:50 AM
Given that some of us repressed and/or denied our transgender truth isn't it reasonable that some have been equally good at repressing orientation??  Once we break down the walls and throw off the shame and guilt it would not surprise me that other discoveries can occur.  And, of course, orientation does not mean we must act on every acknowledged attraction or fear we are missing something.  I have been in a few loving and meaningful relationships with men.  What has been consistent is that I have usually imagined and quietly enjoyed myself as a girl.  Now I can be out about it all, what a relief!

I dunno - I have been thinking about this, but... I used to go to gyms, saunas, swimming pools and saw lots of naked men in locker rooms and it was always like "ewwww.... gross". Now...it's totally different (and I am not very happy about that fact cause dating women is easier and safer too). Of course, he would need to be my type, and being a strong woman, I am only attracted to strong men :D I need to be sure that he can protect me and that he is strong enough to handle me when I get too wild :D.
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awilliams1701

I could possibly see my self finding guys attractive, but I can't comprehend ever desiring them sexually. The thought of that thing is just gross. So if I were to ever actually get interested in guys, I can't see sex happening ever. Probably the best reason to stick to girls. Not that I'm having any luck with girls.
Ashley
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Mariah


Quote from: Tessa James on February 12, 2015, 11:49:50 AM
Given that some of us repressed and/or denied our transgender truth isn't it reasonable that some have been equally good at repressing orientation??  Once we break down the walls and throw off the shame and guilt it would not surprise me that other discoveries can occur.  And, of course, orientation does not mean we must act on every acknowledged attraction or fear we are missing something.  I have been in a few loving and meaningful relationships with men.  What has been consistent is that I have usually imagined and quietly enjoyed myself as a girl.  Now I can be out about it all, what a relief!
very much so. My friends brought that to my attention early on when I had likely repressed it all those years. I was shocked to learn that, but not anymore as I look back I clearly see it.
Mariah


Sent from my Mariah's iPad using Tapatalk
If you have any questions, please feel free to ask me.
[email]mariahsusans.orgstaff@yahoo.com[/email]
I am also spouse of a transgender person.
Retired News Administrator
Retired (S) Global Moderator
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Eva Marie

I have always been attracted to women but I have noticed lately that I have been noticing guys with femme features. The rugged Marlboro men types don't do anything for me, but a guy that's got some femme looks will grab my attention.
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