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I came out to everyone

Started by I Samantha, February 17, 2015, 08:30:18 AM

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I Samantha

So... hey everyone. I'm not really sure as to whether or not I should explain my entire history. I think it's unnecessary, but mostly because I already feel as if I've gotten past a lot of the most daunting initial issues I would have wanted to seek support for.

I was always a little different to the other boys my age and felt as though something was seriously going wrong at around age 13. I wanted to dress like girls - not because it excited me, but because I wanted to be perceived as one. This concept kind of terrified and interested me at the same time, but I thought it was a phase. It would pass.

It didn't.

So here I am at 20. My first step was to come out to my father, who supports me wholeheartedly. Next was my mother, who wants me to be happy and is still wrapping her head around it... but she knows it's what I need. I told my sisters more recently, both of which are excited for a chance to go shopping with me (LOL). So I'm lucky to be in a supportive environment.

I'm seeing a gender therapist that I love, and generally... I guess I'm in a good place. The thing that burns me up is the wait ahead of me (my therapist said I'd be looking at a 6-12 month waiting period before HRT would be a possibility). I've been using the time between now and my unknown HRT date to lose weight and trim down since that's easier on T. I'm also saving money to start a laser treatment schedule.

So I'm also looking to make friends! What do you do to pass the time when waiting for all these appointments and milestones to pass? I can't help but feel like my life won't truly begin until I pop the first pill... but for now it's nice to look at clothes online, and stuff. Y'know.
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Mariah

Hi Samantha, Welcome to Susan's. Oh wow. Why a 6 to 12 month wait. Are you in a different country that requires that. Having said that you should also start on hair removal yesterday while your waiting out your time. I thought I did pretty good starting when I did, but frankly I should have started sooner on it too. Go to a local support group and other related activities will also help you pass some of the time you have ahead of you. As far as the other milestones I just go about living my life since I'm already living full time and have dealt with all my legal hurdles. The moment you started to move forward with your transition that is when life begins. I totally understand the feeling of equating it to the first hormone pill, but the true life really begins before that point or at least it was that way for me. Good Luck and Hugs
Mariah
If you have any questions, please feel free to ask me.
[email]mariahsusans.orgstaff@yahoo.com[/email]
I am also spouse of a transgender person.
Retired News Administrator
Retired (S) Global Moderator
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Muffinheart

I hope my comment won't discourage you, but I remember early on in my therapy sessions, my therapist said "what if, based on blood work or bad liver or whatever,  it wouldn't be advisable to go on hormones?" I said I would still transition, live full time and move forward in life. She was happy with that answer. I think what she was trying to see is if I had any illusions about what effects I could get from hormones. She said in the end, hormones don't make you a woman.
After six years on hormones, I get that. I've met a few full time women who couldn't go on hormones, and they are no less a woman than one on hormones.
Just my opinion.


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I Samantha

Quote from: Mariah2014 on February 17, 2015, 08:42:42 AM
Hi Samantha, Welcome to Susan's. Oh wow. Why a 6 to 12 month wait. Are you in a different country that requires that. Having said that you should also start on hair removal yesterday while your waiting out your time. I thought I did pretty good starting when I did, but frankly I should have started sooner on it too. Go to a local support group and other related activities will also help you pass some of the time you have ahead of you. As far as the other milestones I just go about living my life since I'm already living full time and have dealt with all my legal hurdles. The moment you started to move forward with your transition that is when life begins. I totally understand the feeling of equating it to the first hormone pill, but the true life really begins before that point or at least it was that way for me. Good Luck and Hugs
Mariah

I think the 6-12 month wait is approximate at best. I live in Australia and while we don't have these 'informed consent' clinics, I've seen it's really more or less up to the psychologist themselves as to when they write these letters. The fact is that I could have my letter in two months or twenty. Bit frustrating, admittedly, but I'll settle for saving money, losing weight, working on my voice, and eventually starting laser. I would be starting laser already, but... money. Sigh.

Thanks for the warm welcome!

Quote from: Muffinheart on February 17, 2015, 08:53:55 AM
I hope my comment won't discourage you, but I remember early on in my therapy sessions, my therapist said "what if, based on blood work or bad liver or whatever,  it wouldn't be advisable to go on hormones?" I said I would still transition, live full time and move forward in life. She was happy with that answer. I think what she was trying to see is if I had any illusions about what effects I could get from hormones. She said in the end, hormones don't make you a woman.
After six years on hormones, I get that. I've met a few full time women who couldn't go on hormones, and they are no less a woman than one on hormones.
Just my opinion.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I didn't mean to imply that I didn't think I was a woman because I wasn't on hormones. It just feels like my next big milestone, you know? And after I start HRT, the next few milestones will be 3 months, 6 months, 12 and 18 months!

HRT doesn't give me my womanhood. It just makes me excited.
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Muffinheart

The more I read my reply, I realize it comes off as a know-it-all. I would never want to deprive someone of the joyous feeling of beginning hormones. Maybe because I'm old errr wiser errrr cynical, I've met a lot of people and read a lot.
I'm no expert, just wanted to say hormones are really, really nice part of transition, but "what if" you couldn't go o them?
I had to endure almost six months from start of therapy until I could start hormones. I'm glad I had to, allowed me to start making a check list of things and a timeline for my transition going forward.

I wish you nothing but the best!
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Mariah

Your welcome. I know how frustrating it is waiting for letters. The HRT letter happened quickly in my case, but I have to wait a certain period fort he SRS letters to be written. So I know this waiting game all to well. I kind of figured it was her own timeline and depending on the numbers of visits or how often your visits with her are it could be strung out awhile. Money is what slows my hair removal down too or I would be having my back attacked with laser already.
Mariah
Quote from: I Samantha on February 17, 2015, 09:36:38 AM
I think the 6-12 month wait is approximate at best. I live in Australia and while we don't have these 'informed consent' clinics, I've seen it's really more or less up to the psychologist themselves as to when they write these letters. The fact is that I could have my letter in two months or twenty. Bit frustrating, admittedly, but I'll settle for saving money, losing weight, working on my voice, and eventually starting laser. I would be starting laser already, but... money. Sigh.

Thanks for the warm welcome!

I didn't mean to imply that I didn't think I was a woman because I wasn't on hormones. It just feels like my next big milestone, you know? And after I start HRT, the next few milestones will be 3 months, 6 months, 12 and 18 months!

HRT doesn't give me my womanhood. It just makes me excited.
If you have any questions, please feel free to ask me.
[email]mariahsusans.orgstaff@yahoo.com[/email]
I am also spouse of a transgender person.
Retired News Administrator
Retired (S) Global Moderator
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V M

The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS


- V M
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Paula L

thats great Samantha!  and starting at a nice young age and have a wonderful life ahead of you   be yourself girl!!
Having fun just being a PART TIME GIRL
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Kristyn74

Quote from: I Samantha on February 17, 2015, 09:36:38 AM
I think the 6-12 month wait is approximate at best. I live in Australia and while we don't have these 'informed consent' clinics, I've seen it's really more or less up to the psychologist themselves as to when they write these letters. The fact is that I could have my letter in two months or twenty. Bit frustrating, admittedly, but I'll settle for saving money, losing weight, working on my voice, and eventually starting laser. I would be starting laser already, but... money. Sigh.

Thanks for the warm welcome!

I didn't mean to imply that I didn't think I was a woman because I wasn't on hormones. It just feels like my next big milestone, you know? And after I start HRT, the next few milestones will be 3 months, 6 months, 12 and 18 months!

HRT doesn't give me my womanhood. It just makes me excited.

Hi ,just wanted to let you know I started through Informed consent I'm located in victoria.there are doctors who will, (not trying to be offensive)I went to my endo last week and she suggested not to start laser until at least a year that allows the hair to be more receptive as its finer and is easier. :)
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Devlyn

Hi Samantha, welcome to Susan's Place! I'm from Boston, as you've probably heard, we'll be annexing Australia the next time you drift by the East Coast. There'll be tea and crumpets, of course!  :laugh: See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn
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I Samantha

Thank you everyone for the welcomes! Looking forward to talking with you all :)

Quote from: Kristyn74 on February 18, 2015, 05:18:20 AM
Hi ,just wanted to let you know I started through Informed consent I'm located in victoria.there are doctors who will, (not trying to be offensive)I went to my endo last week and she suggested not to start laser until at least a year that allows the hair to be more receptive as its finer and is easier. :)


I'm curious as to where this might be possible. Would it be out of line for me to ask for a PM with a few more details, please? :) Thank you.
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