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What triggered your late transition?

Started by maybe_amanda, October 15, 2007, 11:56:30 AM

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cindybc

Hi Berliegh
"hee, hee" sorry, Then that makes you just a young-un to me.  ;D

Cindy
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Berliegh

Quote from: cindybc on October 30, 2007, 03:30:55 PM
Hi Berliegh
"hee, hee" sorry, Then that makes you just a young-un to me.  ;D

Cindy

I'll have to find a better profile pic.......I thought I looked young for my age but maybe I don't. 
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Kat

I think you look in your 30s, but thats me :)
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Rachael

Quote from: cindybc on October 30, 2007, 03:17:09 PM
I'm not going to die, I am going to get abducted by aliens. ;D
Berliegh and mortician, I am probably the same age maybe a little older then you two. I would like to respond to both of your messages but my Soul Mate and I will be stepping out for a while and I will write when I get back. I heartily know some about abuse, been there to.

Cindy 
Im not going to die... im going to hell to get SRS... (Spirit ReaSignment...)
R :police:
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Seshatneferw

Quote from: Rachael on October 30, 2007, 03:05:12 PM
Quote from: Lisbeth on October 16, 2007, 09:44:53 AM
And now my greatest fear is getting Alzheimer's and forgetting that I transitioned.
this is a bad thing why?

Well, it certainly may be. Alzheimer's does weird and largely unpredictable things to the brain, and it often destroys more recent memories while keeping early ones. It's possible she'll revert to believing herself a severely gender dysphoric teenage boy -- but then again, she might revert to a teenage girl too. It just depends on which memories go first.  :(

  Nfr
Whoopee! Man, that may have been a small one for Neil, but it's a long one for me.
-- Pete Conrad, Apollo XII
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Rachael

i think her suggestion was that she would forget her transition, and that in itself would be a bad thing, being stuck as a woman with no memory of being anything else, i cant see much wrong, but meh.
R :police:
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Lisbeth

Quote from: Rachael on October 31, 2007, 09:36:59 AM
i think her suggestion was that she would forget her transition, and that in itself would be a bad thing, being stuck as a woman with no memory of being anything else, i cant see much wrong, but meh.
R :police:
Getting stuck remembering nothing but being male would be like being in hell to me.
"Anyone who attempts to play the 'real transsexual' card should be summarily dismissed, as they are merely engaging in name calling rather than serious debate."
--Julia Serano

http://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2011/09/transsexual-versus-transgender.html
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cindybc

With Alzheimer's there would only be a life force that keeps the body, the human shell alive, but the intellect and the consciousness will take a powder into the next dimension. I do believe that even though the soul is not any of the physical genders it could still be of the femme persona. Now this is only my belief, but once the soul gets gone who is going to worry about what transpired on this world?

Cindy
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Lisbeth

That's not the experience I've had with Alzheimer's sufferers I've known.  It's been like a rewinding of their memories.  The most recent ones go first until all they are left with are the ones from childhood.  I'd rather die than be stuck with nothing but those memories from my childhood.
"Anyone who attempts to play the 'real transsexual' card should be summarily dismissed, as they are merely engaging in name calling rather than serious debate."
--Julia Serano

http://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2011/09/transsexual-versus-transgender.html
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Rachael

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Seshatneferw

Yep, Alzheimer's sucks big time. Still, it's not quite a straightforward rewind of memories: certainly the recent ones go first and the ones that stay longest are mostly from the early days, but it's a random process. For instance, my grandmother recognised mom as a relative right until the end, many years after forgetting grandfather (although the exact relationship was lost -- as it must have been, since by that time she knew she was 17).

Anyway, I haven't seen anything on how Alzheimer's affects transsexuals. At a guess, gender identity may well be such a fundamental part of one's personality that it will stay.

  Nfr
Whoopee! Man, that may have been a small one for Neil, but it's a long one for me.
-- Pete Conrad, Apollo XII
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Lisbeth

Quote from: Seshatneferw on October 31, 2007, 02:34:40 PM
Yep, Alzheimer's sucks big time. Still, it's not quite a straightforward rewind of memories: certainly the recent ones go first and the ones that stay longest are mostly from the early days, but it's a random process. For instance, my grandmother recognised mom as a relative right until the end, many years after forgetting grandfather (although the exact relationship was lost -- as it must have been, since by that time she knew she was 17).
Unlike my mother who at the end thought I was her brother.
"Anyone who attempts to play the 'real transsexual' card should be summarily dismissed, as they are merely engaging in name calling rather than serious debate."
--Julia Serano

http://juliaserano.blogspot.com/2011/09/transsexual-versus-transgender.html
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Suzy

This conversation is odd to me.  I work with Alzheimer's patients on a fairly regular basis.  There is NOTHING good about this disease.  Nothing!  There is no way of predicting which memories will come or go.  The only sure thing is that the person is eventually left as a disconnected body in this world, bringing hardship on family and friends.

Kristi
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katia

Re: What triggered your late transition?

???

what's considered late transition?  30 and over?
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Rachael

paypal for grs... whatever next ><
I consider late waiting 20 years after i was born to be me again...
R :police:
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Shana A

I don't know what age is considered late, I was in my 30s.

I was married at 26, and sometime during my marriage came out as gay. I'd had a few experiences before that, both gay and crossdressing, however chalked it all up to "experimentation". Fast forward a few years, we divorced, and I lived as an openly gay/bi male for a couple of years.

In 1993 I went with a transgender friend to the GLB march on Washington... T hadn't been added yet, maybe bi wasn't even added either, I don't remember. We marched with various groups during the afternoon. Finally she said let's go find the trans contingent. We did, it was a small group, maybe couple of dozen people, and marched with them the rest of the afternoon. Interestingly, I felt more comfortable with them than anywhere else that day. Hmmmm. The very next day, I realized that I was transgender and came out, transitioned and started RLE very shortly after.

zythyra 
"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." Oscar Wilde


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Berliegh

I think anything over 18 years old is a late transition...

testoterone usually kicks in by then and your body will develop in the way you don't want it to. Some might get less exposure and get away with more but it happens and it's then hard to eradicate.

I started in my 30's but was taking hormones in my mid 20's and even though I didn't know what to do at that time I knew I had to take something.
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Joyce

Boy, these replies sound so familiar it's scary.  I had started a transition of sorts in my early 30's, working on self-awareness and increasing social activities and was probably headed for full-time when I met my wife, fell in love, and believed in what Boylan describes as "true love fixing me."  I remember also feeling the phrase "it's time to put away childish things and grow up."  But, in what lots and lots of us know to be true, GID can't be put away or buried.  Last year, around the end of summer, first of autumn, I was floored with depression, isolation, and desperation, and I knew, even before verbalizing it, that my constant companion during my life, gender dysphoria, was back with me, but more voracious, more tenacious than ever before.  The fall was an awful spiral of misery, of telling myself to "shake it off" or to "think my way out of this mess," but nothing worked.  Around December, I hit bottom and realized, probably for the first time in my life, that there was some sort of biological inevitability about my condition and that no matter how hard I fought, I was going to lose. It felt like I was being pushed, almost unconsciously towards a place that I'd really prefer not to visit, but that I really had not choice about, like cattle being driven, inexorably towards the slaughterhouse.   

However, with the stark realization that this was in huge measure inevitable, even if it wasn't very desirable, I began to reframe the battle so that it wasn't losing, but rather winning the battle of self-awareness and insight.  I started in psychotherapy in December, talked to my wife in January, met my doctor in February, started Spiro in March, started Estradiol in April, started laser in May, lost 40 pounds by June, got a hair transplant in July, adjusted my doses in August, and began making plans for transition with my wife in September and October.  And the funny thing is, the more I take action about this, the better I have begun to feel.  Whoever said in this thread that it wasn't hormones that treated depression, but self-honesty, was absolutely right. 

I'm still frightened, but not desperate.  I really don't know how things will turn out, but I feel as if I have a future as a 47 year old woman instead of a trapped, miserable old man. 

Like others on this thread, I do wish I had had the internet or talk TV or even the most rudimentary awareness of gender issues when I was growing up in the 60's and early 70's, but I simply did not.  I knew about my feelings, but was certain that no one else felt like this and that it would be suicide for a rancher's boy to reveal these feelings to his parents or friends.  On the one hand, I feel cowardly that I didn't pursue this earlier, since fear drove my supression, but on the other hand, I'm realistic enough to recognize that I really don't know how I would have practically pursue it. 

Carpe diem.  Life is short, and if you know what's causing you misery, I think you owe it to yourself and to your loved ones to make yourself whole. 

Joyce
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cindybc

Hi Joyce
Welcome to Susan's. I was 50 years old before I started transitioning, and began full time at 55.
Hun it aint no wonder we didn't start until later in years. I wish I had known about GID back in the sixties and seventies I probably would have started transitioning much sooner. I didn't know anything about it until about 15 years ago. And yes unfortunately some not knowing better drag a wife and children into the scene. And they are darn well very lucky if the wife and kids stick it out with them. There is more I would like to share with you if you wish but right now I am about to go out to get eye brow tattoos.

Sincerely

Cindy   
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Valentina

I'd say that any transition over 20 years of age is considered "late".  The success for transition is harder as ppl get older.  The longer people live in the wrong gender roles, the harder it is to break up old habits and "transition".
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