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The New you know you pass when

Started by peky, March 23, 2012, 08:56:49 AM

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antonia

Love it, breaking peoples preconceptions in the best possible way :)

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on March 04, 2015, 12:55:51 PM
This one was awkward :). I was taking kiddo over to my ex and there was one woman in the bus, asking for directions (she needed to know which connections to take to get to distant shopping mall) - so I helped her out, we chatted a bit and we had to leave on the same station and go for the same next one.
She complimented kiddo and told that she has four children, all grown up etc etc etc and then she asked for my name (we were having conversation in Russian, which has some relevance here) - I fething hate when people ask for my name when I am dressed very andro because I never know how they perceive me. So, I thought that my voice kinda sucks, and this andro outfit was more male-leaning anyways, so I gave her my male name (in Russian - where it does not have the distinctive male or female ending). I look at her face and it gives literally no signs, and she admits that this is very rare name and she has never met anyone with such name.
Oh well. We go to the next station and keep chatting, and she asks which kindergarten we are attending - I reply giving the location which is on the other side of the city. She comments that it must be pretty far and I reply that it's ok, because during working week kiddo stays with mother and she takes her to kindergarten. She comments that kiddo must be missing her mommy then  (me  - ???) - I reply that nope, she is with mother for five days in the row. She says, but You just told that she is spending that time with granny. (me - even more ?!?). So I say, nope, she is spending the working week with HER mother, not my... Lady: so, she is not Your daughter then? Me (confused) - nope, she is my daughter. Lady - even more confused - but You just said...
And then I realised...
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cindy16

Really! I am just trying to imagine that woman's expression and can't stop smiling. :P
Emily, how did it end btw?

Quote from: antonia on March 04, 2015, 05:40:54 PM
Love it, breaking peoples preconceptions in the best possible way :)
Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on March 04, 2015, 12:55:51 PM
This one was awkward :). I was taking kiddo over to my ex and there was one woman in the bus, asking for directions (she needed to know which connections to take to get to distant shopping mall) - so I helped her out, we chatted a bit and we had to leave on the same station and go for the same next one.
She complimented kiddo and told that she has four children, all grown up etc etc etc and then she asked for my name (we were having conversation in Russian, which has some relevance here) - I fething hate when people ask for my name when I am dressed very andro because I never know how they perceive me. So, I thought that my voice kinda sucks, and this andro outfit was more male-leaning anyways, so I gave her my male name (in Russian - where it does not have the distinctive male or female ending). I look at her face and it gives literally no signs, and she admits that this is very rare name and she has never met anyone with such name.
Oh well. We go to the next station and keep chatting, and she asks which kindergarten we are attending - I reply giving the location which is on the other side of the city. She comments that it must be pretty far and I reply that it's ok, because during working week kiddo stays with mother and she takes her to kindergarten. She comments that kiddo must be missing her mommy then  (me  - ???) - I reply that nope, she is with mother for five days in the row. She says, but You just told that she is spending that time with granny. (me - even more ?!?). So I say, nope, she is spending the working week with HER mother, not my... Lady: so, she is not Your daughter then? Me (confused) - nope, she is my daughter. Lady - even more confused - but You just said...
And then I realised...
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Jill F

The guy who came to fix my BBQ grill igniter today noticed my guitars and amps and asked if my husband was someone famous.

He was pretty floored when I told him they were my guitars, but said he should have figured that out because of all the pink and yellow ones.   (I actually had them since before I transitioned.)

*facepalm*
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Sammy

Jill - ah, those stereotypes, lol :).

Thank You antonia and cindy :). Since I was pretty much cornered, I admitted that I am her dad, which made for an awkward pause - during which I assume, she was going mentally through all possible explanations - and ended with standard ones - oh, I am so sorry (please dont, You are not the first person actually. It just.. tends to happen) - it must be Your hair then and that "You both were interacting in such a soft and tender manner".
Actually, kiddo tends to be quite rough in her expressions but yes, I am noticing that I am not really treating her like a dad (unless she really gets me and I grab her and start tickling and scrunching - sometimes she really deserves that though she loves that part as hell :) ). And I suspect, I have no idea how to treat daughter like a dad, because those examples I have seen in kindergarten... they suck, they really do. Seriously, what the hell is wrong with those guys - they barely mutter a couple of words, just issue orders and that's it. Are they really so much afraid to show some affection into their child lives or this is the damn society and its standards of masculine behaviour to blame?

Anyway, I am starting to learn those lessons and though I have not officially went full-time, today in the office I am wearing female hoodie, female jeans and Doc Marten's (well, that one is pretty considered unisex - my feet have shrunk even more and I can squeeze into EU size 40 shoes, yay!) - and I am wearing female active sportswear cycling jacket as well. So far nobody seems to give a damn about - neither at the office, on the streets or in the shopping malls.
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Eveline

OK, I know this is lame, because they always ask this but:

Today I went to a new dentist, with my brand new license and insurance cards. The technician was very nice, just chatting away. Then, before taking the x-rays, she stopped and asked, "Not pregnant, are we?".

I love it. :)
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April_TO

Amazing Emily :) Love this share xo

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on March 05, 2015, 01:04:03 AM
Jill - ah, those stereotypes, lol :).

Thank You antonia and cindy :). Since I was pretty much cornered, I admitted that I am her dad, which made for an awkward pause - during which I assume, she was going mentally through all possible explanations - and ended with standard ones - oh, I am so sorry (please dont, You are not the first person actually. It just.. tends to happen) - it must be Your hair then and that "You both were interacting in such a soft and tender manner".
Actually, kiddo tends to be quite rough in her expressions but yes, I am noticing that I am not really treating her like a dad (unless she really gets me and I grab her and start tickling and scrunching - sometimes she really deserves that though she loves that part as hell :) ). And I suspect, I have no idea how to treat daughter like a dad, because those examples I have seen in kindergarten... they suck, they really do. Seriously, what the hell is wrong with those guys - they barely mutter a couple of words, just issue orders and that's it. Are they really so much afraid to show some affection into their child lives or this is the damn society and its standards of masculine behaviour to blame?

Anyway, I am starting to learn those lessons and though I have not officially went full-time, today in the office I am wearing female hoodie, female jeans and Doc Marten's (well, that one is pretty considered unisex - my feet have shrunk even more and I can squeeze into EU size 40 shoes, yay!) - and I am wearing female active sportswear cycling jacket as well. So far nobody seems to give a damn about - neither at the office, on the streets or in the shopping malls.
Nothing ventured nothing gained
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April_TO

I went to the drugstore today to get some lipbalm. I was asking this lady about it and what she thinks about the product. She was very friendly and explained everything in detail. I was wearing a dress shirt and slacks for work - male mode.

After the convo, she sort of yelled to the other saleslady "Do you mind cashing HER out"

I smiled and thanked her.
Nothing ventured nothing gained
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SarahSchilling

So, this has been about 8 months ago.

I was in male mode (button up shirts and jeans, no makeup) while attending school, and went fulltime in between semesters. There were two girls that i was friends with that were in my class from the semester before, and i had a class with them again. So, after freaking out about it for days, I texted them both that I was trans and living as a woman now.

They both seperately responded that they thought I was female from the last semester, when I thought I was in guy mode. One said she just thought I was a lesbian.

We had a good laugh.
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Jill F

The transwoman in front of me in the checkout line totally didn't notice, even after I smiled at her.   
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Eva Marie

I was at a local big chain discount store tonight doing some shopping and a guy that was restocking the shelves made a point to ask me if I needed any help as I walked by (I think he was flirting) - "no, i'm fine, thanks!" and about two aisles over another guy that was also doing shelf stocking walked by me and made a funny comment about what he was carrying as went went by with a big smile so I smiled back and then as I was walking away I heard him ask me if I needed any help. I looked back and he had that goofy look that guys get when they are around a female that they are attracted to, so I just smiled demurely and said "thanks, i'm doing ok" and kept walking.

That makes two flirts in the span of two aisles at the store by two decent looking guys  :laugh:
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barbie

I do not care about passing. I frequently meet new people in business. They do know that I am biologically male. In some cases, a few of them study close by my face, and I know the difference in their eyes. I know I pass based on the stare whether they know my background or not.

barbie~~
Just do it.
  • skype:barbie?call
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Eveline

Quote from: Eva Marie on March 10, 2015, 12:14:25 AM
... That makes two flirts in the span of two aisles at the store by two decent looking guys  :laugh:

I love this!
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StrykerXIII

A few days back on facebook, I came out in a group I was added to by a friend. Amid all the usual "what's trans?" and "so which one are you?", there were two comments that I'll never forget, both let me know I'm definitely passing:

From a male member of the group: "OH COME ON...I was drooling over your profile pic just now, and now I feel all awkward about it!" (that was the real tickler, he proceeded to add me and get a full explanation of what it meant to be MtF. He hasn't stopped using female pronouns ever since - he's a real doll <3 )

From a female member: "So wait...you're biologically a guy?"
Me: "Well, yes, in all technicality."
Her: "No boobs? No vagina?"
Me: "Nope and nope."
Her: "YOU'RE PRETTIER THAN I AM OMG I HATE YOU THAT IS SO MESSED UP!!!"

THAT, ladies, is how you know you pass - when a ciswoman loses her cool because she's jealous of your looks.  :icon_dance:
To strive to reach the apex of evolution is folly, for to achieve the pinnacle is to birth a god.

When the Stryker fires, all turn to dust in its wake.
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Adam (birkin)

A lady saw only the top of my head and said "will you be using credit card, ma'am?" I looked up at her and her jaw instantly dropped and she went quite for a bit and said "...oh my God, sir, I am so sorry, I wasn't looking properly."
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Alana_Jane

Quote from: Eva Marie on March 10, 2015, 12:14:25 AM
I was at a local big chain discount store tonight doing some shopping and a guy that was restocking the shelves made a point to ask me if I needed any help as I walked by (I think he was flirting) - "no, i'm fine, thanks!" and about two aisles over another guy that was also doing shelf stocking walked by me and made a funny comment about what he was carrying as went went by with a big smile so I smiled back and then as I was walking away I heard him ask me if I needed any help. I looked back and he had that goofy look that guys get when they are around a female that they are attracted to, so I just smiled demurely and said "thanks, i'm doing ok" and kept walking.

That makes two flirts in the span of two aisles at the store by two decent looking guys  :laugh:

I love this Eva.  I hope you get just as good a reaction out of your ex when you see her next.  Even to the point that she doesn't recognise you.  Best of luck this weekend.
Hugs,

-Alana
Alana - Beautiful/Serene/Awakening
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immortal gypsy

I'm at the doctors to get my referral for my neuro, I tell the receptionist we have to change my details. Oh I'm down there as male also can we please change my title, she looks at me up and down.

"What how on earth did that happen?"
Do not fear those who have nothing left to lose, fear those who are prepared to lose it all

Si vis bellum, parra pacem
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ImagineKate

I haven't had the guy handing out barber shop flyers try to hand me one in a long time.
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Sydney_NYC

Quote from: ImagineKate on March 19, 2015, 10:35:06 AM
I haven't had the guy handing out barber shop flyers try to hand me one in a long time.

:)
Sydney





Born - 1970
Came Out To Self/Wife - Sept-21-2013
Started therapy - Oct-15-2013
Laser and Electrolysis - Oct-24-2013
HRT - Dec-12-2013
Full time - Mar-15-2014
Name change  - June-23-2014
GCS - Nov-2-2017 (Dr Rachel Bluebond-Langner)


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Jill F

Last night I ran into a woman that I had met a handful of times as a guy and had conversed with in depth several times.  Apparently she didn't get the memo about me.

"Hi, I'm V."
"Hi V., Jill"
"So are you one of <wife's name>'s law partners?"
"No, I'm her wife."
"How long have you been married?"
"20 years."
*gasp*
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Alana_Jane

Nice!!

I'll add my second to that, having meet you in person.  I'd give you a pass any day of the week.

-Alana
Alana - Beautiful/Serene/Awakening
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