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I am able to orgasm after SRS - implications

Started by teresita, April 09, 2015, 01:43:13 PM

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teresita

Dear all,

I wanted to share my experience. A few months ago I had SRS. A few days ago I was able to orgasm. I was able to climax the day after too (NOT the day after surgery, but the day after my first orgasm, and then 2 days after again). Why am I saying this? Because everybody told me that orgasm after SRS was impossible. Before SRS, several people who gravitate around the trans community tried to dissuade me from having SRS. They were so insistent and told me I would never, ever experience an orgasm ever again. I still went ahead because I just did not feel comfortable with male genitalia. To my surprise, then, so far, I have had 5 orgasms and they were NOT psychological. They were absolutely real, very, very intense, 4 were clitoral and only 1 was vaginal. Sorry if I am going into too much detail, but it angers me that there is so much disinformation out there and some people might be scared to go ahead with SRS because of these urban myths.

The bad thing is that I was told that caliper/girth of the neovagina is more of a problem than depth. Not true in my experience. I have no problem with girth but I wish it was deeper. So far is 5 and 1/2 and even though doctors assured me that it is a good enough depth, it is not.

The other bad side is that society will still consider me a mutilated man and not a woman. A vagina does not magically change the male bone structure, nor does it make you a woman to women's eyes, BUT, it is nice to know that I am able to orgasm.
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Myarkstir

Getting on 5 months and still unable toget a single O.

So no it is not missinformation, you are just very lucky.  ;)
Sylvia M.
Senior news staff




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Rejennyrated

Quote from: Myarkstir on April 09, 2015, 02:23:57 PM
Getting on 5 months and still unable toget a single O.

So no it is not missinformation, you are just very lucky.  ;)
Well to be fair having counselled well over 100 or more, now postop, women in my life, I'm affraid I have say it is truer to say that you are just VERY unlucky indeed and I'm extremely sorry to hear that of course.

Those who told the OP that it was impossible were indeed spreading misinformation, as would anyone be if they said that it was not generally possible, because not only does the medical data contradict that, but In my own direct experience about 99% are orgasmic afterwards, although in some cases it did take up to a year to happen.

Medically speaking there is no reason why a postop should not be able to orgasm unless they are just very unfortunate. Age and previous alcohol and drug usage may have an effect, as will any current use of antidepressants, as all these things can either impair nerve regeneration or in the case of some SSRI's interfere directly with the neural circuitry involved in orgasm - but in general I can safely state that it is the case that a postop should be able to orgasm.
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Rejennyrated

PS - I will add - this assumes that they were orgasmic before of course... If they weren't orgasmic pre-op then of course its impossible to predict.
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teresita

I have to say that it depends on the doctor, maybe. I don't know, but I have heard so many (non-op TS and ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s) trying to discourage me that I ended up believing that it was impossible. I don't think I was that lucky, to be honest. And I don't have the healthiest eating habits either and I take antidepressants, still, I was able
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teresita

the reason why I am so adamant about this is that I don't understand why certain people (especially non-op TS and ->-bleeped-<-s) go out of their way to spread misinformation. You want to be non-op? Fine, but why would you want to scare other people who want to be post-op? I don't get it./
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Rejennyrated

Well of course I've now stood on both sides of the table, so to speak. I've just completed a surgical rotation, so I've been in theatre and seen how many operations are done. I've even assisted with a breast enhancement. There is great care taken by every surgeon I've worked with, to minimise any nerve damage and resultant numbness, and with SRS even more so.

Information from ->-bleeped-<-s is not reliable because most of them like pre-op girls and hence don't want you to have surgery, but thats their problem not yours. Fact is there is medical data on this, and it shows a high success rate in maintaing orgasmic ability certainly 80 or 90% at least, but it can take time because some people heal slower than others.

Sadly I'm already too old for a career as a surgeon, so I'm not going to be the next Marci Bowers, but it has been interesting to see, and when I'm a GP I shall at least be able to give people good advice.
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teresita

"
Information from ->-bleeped-<-s is not reliable because most of them like pre-op girls and hence don't want you to have surgery, but thats their problem not yours. Fact is there is medical data on this, and it shows a high success rate in maintaing orgasmic ability certainly 80 or 90% at least, but it can take time because some people heal slower than others."

That's exactly my point. However, not everybody has a critical eye, ear and discern info critically. I realized that they will, of course, try to discourage any girl from having SRS. ->-bleeped-<-s like penis, so, imagine every single transsexual had SRS, ->-bleeped-<-s would kill themselves  ;D ;D ;D

In my case, I had to get rid of it. At all costs. ->-bleeped-<-s told me that if I got rid of it, I would lose any potential for any man. They said that the only quality a TS has is the penis and if she gets rid of it, she won't attract ->-bleeped-<-s and she won't attract regular guys either. Do we realize how damaging that info is? To let people in our community believe that the only chance we stand is with ->-bleeped-<-s who obsess over a penis?

that's why they use scare tactics. The problem is that they are very convincing on girls they deal with, and that's where we need to do something. I also went to a few meetings of latina transsexuals and the moderator herself (a non-op TS), scared the sh#it out of everybody saying how bad SRS is.
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Laura_7

Quote from: Myarkstir on April 09, 2015, 02:23:57 PM
Getting on 5 months and still unable toget a single O.

So no it is not missinformation, you are just very lucky.  ;)

You might have a look here for a few thoughts that might help:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,185786.msg1653885.html#msg1653885


hugs
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suzifrommd

According to a poll I've been running, the overwhelming majority of post-op women were able to climax.

Alas, I'm one of the rare ones who hasn't. :(
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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kelly_aus

The stats I've seen suggest that 90-95% of women are orgasmic post-op..

Quote from: teresita on April 09, 2015, 03:19:42 PM
the reason why I am so adamant about this is that I don't understand why certain people (especially non-op TS and ->-bleeped-<-s) go out of their way to spread misinformation. You want to be non-op? Fine, but why would you want to scare other people who want to be post-op? I don't get it./

Way to tar all non-op people with the same brush. I'm non-op and would never tell someone not to have SRS, not if it was something they were 100% positive they wanted/needed. About the only comments I will make in that area are related to surgeon choice and even then I do it in a non-judgemental way.. And I can't think of any of my non-op friends who would do any different to me. And as for listening to ->-bleeped-<-s? Why would you listen to anything that someone who sees you purely as a sexual fetish has to say? Of course they are going to want yo to stay as their perfect fetish object..

Short version: You want to have SRS? Go for it, just pick a reputable, board-certified surgeon who also was access to a hospital if it's needed.
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Jenna Marie

Wow, who was telling you that?!! I've seen it cited fairly often that about 80% of trans women can climax after GRS, and it's more like 99% of those who could orgasm before. (So in other words, the biggest predictor of whether you'll succeed afterward is whether you/your body "knows how" beforehand.) Heck, the number of people I know who couldn't orgasm by one year post-op when they could before can be numbered on one hand - and of those, a couple more finally managed it after years of trying.

I had an orgasm while sleeping at 3 weeks post-op, so I knew it was possible, but it still took me several months to figure out how to work the equipment while conscious.

And I'm with others in thinking that maybe it's not good to get medical advice from people with a fetish for trans women with penises who are potentially manipulative liars. ;)  (NOT saying all "->-bleeped-<-s" are like this, much less non-op women [!!], but it's wise to do some investigating when someone tells you a "proven fact" that just coincidentally happens to be precisely their fondest wish.)
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teresita

ladies, please. I am not stupid, nor is any of the people I have met who were easily mislead. We are not saying that we go to ->-bleeped-<-s for medical advice. PLEASE! What I am saying is that there is this urban myth in the community and in trans-associations, the ones I have seen, at least. Now, again, nobody in their right mind would go to a club and ask for medical advice, but, this is how it goes: You go to an event or to a place where ->-bleeped-<-s and non-op girls cater, or you meet a guy who seem to be a non-->-bleeped-<- and the topic comes up. The topic of getting SRS. That is one of the most recurrent topics in TS venues. The typical response in MOST cases is "don't get SRS 'cuz you won't be able to climax" "why would you do that? You lose your attractiveness" "why would a guy pick you and not a REAL woman (their word) if it wasn't for that long clit you have"? these things anger me.

I am smart enough and determined enough not to listen to them, but, how many are as determined as I am? I have PERSONALLY spoken to dozens of girls who WANT to have the surgery but they have been brainwashed so much that they are scared to death. My goal is to dispel this rumor as much as I can because I have been able to orgasm. Is it clear now? It's not that they go to ->-bleeped-<-s, or that I go to ->-bleeped-<-s and ask for their permission. It's that the ones who try to discourage you from SRS use scare tactics that work on many people. Even myself, despite all I have read, I was determined to have srs but, still, I was convinced I would never have an orgasm.

AS for painting with broad brush: do we always have to say that we are making generalizations? It's as if I state that dogs bark or dogs tend to bark and someone comes up and say "you can't generalize because my cousin has a dog who doesn't bark but meows"

I identified general tendencies. There will always be the exception, but the general tendency is from what I have seen to discourage from getting SRS because a) you won't orgasm b) you won't find a sexual partner (you'll be damaged good for regular guys and damaged good for ->-bleeped-<-s)
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kelly_aus

Quote from: teresita on April 09, 2015, 07:16:36 PM
ladies, please. I am not stupid, nor is any of the people I have met who were easily mislead. We are not saying that we go to ->-bleeped-<-s for medical advice. PLEASE! What I am saying is that there is this urban myth in the community and in trans-associations, the ones I have seen, at least. Now, again, nobody in their right mind would go to a club and ask for medical advice, but, this is how it goes: You go to an event or to a place where ->-bleeped-<-s and non-op girls cater, or you meet a guy who seem to be a non-->-bleeped-<- and the topic comes up. The topic of getting SRS. That is one of the most recurrent topics in TS venues. The typical response in MOST cases is "don't get SRS 'cuz you won't be able to climax" "why would you do that? You lose your attractiveness" "why would a guy pick you and not a REAL woman (their word) if it wasn't for that long clit you have"? these things anger me.

I am smart enough and determined enough not to listen to them, but, how many are as determined as I am? I have PERSONALLY spoken to dozens of girls who WANT to have the surgery but they have been brainwashed so much that they are scared to death. My goal is to dispel this rumor as much as I can because I have been able to orgasm. Is it clear now? It's not that they go to ->-bleeped-<-s, or that I go to ->-bleeped-<-s and ask for their permission. It's that the ones who try to discourage you from SRS use scare tactics that work on many people. Even myself, despite all I have read, I was determined to have srs but, still, I was convinced I would never have an orgasm.

AS for painting with broad brush: do we always have to say that we are making generalizations? It's as if I state that dogs bark or dogs tend to bark and someone comes up and say "you can't generalize because my cousin has a dog who doesn't bark but meows"

I identified general tendencies. There will always be the exception, but the general tendency is from what I have seen to discourage from getting SRS because a) you won't orgasm b) you won't find a sexual partner (you'll be damaged good for regular guys and damaged good for ->-bleeped-<-s)

Perhaps you need to hang out with a better bunch of people and in better places - as I've never heard any of the kind of crap you are spouting. It goes against the available medical evidence and it also goes against the stories of many post-op women I know or have read about. And I'd be quite vocal about it if I did, but I also wouldn't be making any generalisations while I did..

EDIT: I've had more trouble from within the trans community for being non-op.. For me, it's not a choice, it's a medical reality and I still get crap for it.
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Jenna Marie

Teresita, I believe you that this has been your experience, but it may not be a common one. Still, you deserve credit for trying to get the word out to reassure other women.

Personally, I've been hanging out with trans women in person and online for years now and not run across this particular myth anymore (the *risk* that someone might never orgasm again, yes, but not the promise that it's a guarantee), which is why I was surprised. It sounds like you run in different and very unpleasant circles, and I'm sorry for that.
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teresita

Why am I not surprised that I get this response "perhaps you should hang out with a different group of people"
That is not the way to counterargument something. Please do not concern yourself with the group of people I hang out with. My concern is also for the other people who are not as determined and opinionated as I am and are led astray by the constant spreading of myths that SRS means end of sexual pleasure. Even Lynn Conway felt the need to write about SRS and to debunk the urban myth that post-op women desex themselves. If other people in my community have felt that need, that means that something must be going on. I mean, has anybody else witnessed these scare tactics? I can't be the only one seeing this.

You want to be non-op? Fine, perfectly fine, but don't try to scare other people away from SRS. You do not do that, fine, I applaud you, but there are many other people who do discourage
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teresita

Jenna Marie, I actually registered on this forum today, exactly because I wanted to share my experience. I can guarantee you that this myth has been going on for years and, while I refused to believe it, deep down, it was rooted in me that I was NEVER going to climax anymore. You'll understand why I want to spread the word as much as I can. Even the lay people who are close enough to me to know about my transition, ask that exact question: "are you really able to feel anything? I thought you would be numb forever". So, it really, really shocks me that you girls have had a completely different experience.
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Myarkstir

Quote from: teresita on April 09, 2015, 07:56:28 PM
Jenna Marie, I actually registered on this forum today, exactly because I wanted to share my experience. I can guarantee you that this myth has been going on for years and, while I refused to believe it, deep down, it was rooted in me that I was NEVER going to climax anymore. You'll understand why I want to spread the word as much as I can. Even the lay people who are close enough to me to know about my transition, ask that exact question: "are you really able to feel anything? I thought you would be numb forever". So, it really, really shocks me that you girls have had a completely different experience.

17 years of transition and you are my dear the ONLY person I have ever heard that from...
Sylvia M.
Senior news staff




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teresita

ok, then, you are saying I made it up? that I came here for no reason other than making up that there is this urban myth? Plus, 17 years of transition... it's not the quantity but the quality. If your transition was made outside of any circles and in the privacy of your home, then, of course you have never heard of it... if you live in So. Cal, I would take you to meetings where the discuss the fact that SRS means end of sensation. I am dead serious, I am not joking. I am shocked that you girls are saying that you never had this experience.
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Atypical

I just wanted to comment on this, as I read some things I found a bit alarming.

I might be a transguy, but my sexual preferences and libido rival that of your stereotypical lumberjack on roids. I like ladies because I like ladies, and there's no way in nine hells I'm going to be turned off by her having lady parts. Vaginas come in all sizes and shapes, so do clitorises, breasts, body structure, etc.

Everyone is different and I'm just happy to please my partner, in the end. With whatever they've got.

I don't know what the hell is wrong with those '->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-' folks, but if you ask me, they don't deserve -any- kind of woman. Any kind of person in general, really.

Just my two cents. I'll skedaddle now.
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