I've been living as Grace for almost 13 months now - but until this morning my brother had no idea I was trans. I haven't seen him since xmas 2013 and we've only exchanged a few texts in that time. I haven't been very close to him for many years now - not estranged, we just don't have much in common except DNA. (Plus I've never really clicked with his wife.)

I never told him in part because it didn't really seem to matter either way, but also I was expecting he wouldn't be very impressed and I just couldn't be bothered going there. My mother was quite happy he not know for similar reasons.

Recent events with my father sort of forced my hand and I had to acknowledge I was a bit scared to tell my brother. Even though he is younger than me and I've not been much of a "brother" to him I guess we have that usual type of sibling relationship.

Anyway, I told him this morning over the phone. He seemed to take it remarkably well - said that if I was happy then that was all that mattered. I didn't realise how much of a relief it would be to just tell him and get it over and done with. But I've told my father I'm not intending to cut myself off from my family so I need to act like I mean it.

Wonderful!

I'm proud of you, Ms Grace.  You often inspire me w/ your posts and this one is a real winner

I'm glad to hear he took it well! Coming out to people can really show you a side to people you didn't expect to find.

I am happy for you.

Perhaps you sister in law will "click better" now

Thats great Grace  Maybe things can be easier for you now, now you dont have to worry about that. Its always nice when we get a nice reaction when it wasnt expected. Not always easy to predict how someone will take it even if we expect a certain reaction they can be the exact opposite. My gran doesnt know yet due to no idea how she will take it.. hopefully it would be the same as here and go well though. Knowing how they are about other people doesnt mean they will be that way with you so it can be really hard to tell what will happen

Awesome, Grace! <3

Quote from: Damara on April 19, 2015, 04:57:57 PM
Awesome, Grace! <3

ditto

Support from unexpected sources is always a nice surprise.  Congrats Gracie.

Wow Grace! Some pretty amazing things happening these past few days.

Nice that you have had some positive family news there Grace. Here's hoping it continues!

Quote from: JoanneB on April 19, 2015, 09:02:15 PM
Wow Grace! Some pretty amazing things happening these past few days.

Yes, it's been quite the whirlwind week!

That's wonderful Grace, Congrats.

Its always nice when these things go well. Maybe your relationship will improve in the future.

It was a huge relief to me to come out to everyone both accepting and rejecting. My two rejecting sisters were the last I told (because I knew from their negative attitudes over the LGBT community) and even though it didn't go well it was still a huge relief. It meant I was done hiding.

Quote from: Ms Grace on April 18, 2015, 05:32:05 AM
I've been living as Grace for almost 13 months now - but until this morning my brother had no idea I was trans. I haven't seen him since xmas 2013 and we've only exchanged a few texts in that time. I haven't been very close to him for many years now - not estranged, we just don't have much in common except DNA. (Plus I've never really clicked with his wife.)

I never told him in part because it didn't really seem to matter either way, but also I was expecting he wouldn't be very impressed and I just couldn't be bothered going there. My mother was quite happy he not know for similar reasons.

Recent events with my father sort of forced my hand and I had to acknowledge I was a bit scared to tell my brother. Even though he is younger than me and I've not been much of a "brother" to him I guess we have that usual type of sibling relationship.

Anyway, I told him this morning over the phone. He seemed to take it remarkably well - said that if I was happy then that was all that mattered. I didn't realise how much of a relief it would be to just tell him and get it over and done with. But I've told my father I'm not intending to cut myself off from my family so I need to act like I mean it.

Yes, better out than in. I had meant to tell way back when I transitioned, but I let it slide since I never see or talk to him anyway. A week became a month became a year and the consequence of a hostile email from my father kind of rallied me to finally just get it out.

Grace, I am curious if your brother and other family members still call you buy your male name or do they use your female name?  How do you feel about this?

My brother says he accepts me and just wants me to be happy, but he says that no matter what I will always be his brother (except I processionally hear him call me "sister" on the phone - in Spanish "brother" and "sister" are only one vowel difference).  Other members of my family have just said, "Well, I'll never call you 'Rosa"", which I take as nonacceptance.  My make exception for my brother because our relationship is so close.

Rosa

In my case one of my sisters has progressed from your Allen and will always be Allen to I'm willing to call you "A".

Yeah!  People are, now or over time able to understand or identify another persons ID long before the person comes out.  If not, times are changing.  Or is it me?   Glad to hear all went well


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Ms. Grace, that's awesome news!

It's funny how we always think the worst and then get pleasantly surprised? (Had that experience a couple times myself!)

May you enjoy beautiful things coming from this.

Quote from: Rosa on April 23, 2015, 05:19:29 PM
Grace, I am curious if your brother and other family members still call you buy your male name or do they use your female name?  How do you feel about this?

My mother and sister call me Grace - at least to my face and in correspondence, not sure what they use when I'm not around. My father still uses my male name - I've told him it is insulting but he doesn't seem to care. I  try to ignore the bait but it does hurt. My brother hasn't had long enough to show how he will respond.