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Learning to flirt girl

Started by April Lee, April 25, 2015, 01:35:12 PM

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April Lee

First of all, as a boy I was a dreadful flirt. I was way too obvious and way too serious. Now as a girl, I am vastly more out going and engaging, but I still feel that my flirting skills are not where they should be. Does anybody have any tips in this regard, or could point me somewhere I could get that kind of information?
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Tessa James

Perhaps this is a bit simplistic but I find a smile and some level of eye contact are all one needs to get some motors humming.  It is also stereotypical but being a good listener demonstrates interest and don't we all love to make friends!

And then You Tube surely has a video for every occasion, eh?
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013
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ana1111

generally its best to wait to receive some kind of single or some kinda attention first from them...if its online though do whatever you want but in person flirting with someone who is ignoring you or worse clearly not interested would be terribly awkward... anyways how to flirt subtly but effectively 101:
touch and play with your hair a bit, run your fingers through it but don't do too much or it will annoy people... also smiling a lot at the person and "smizing" (smiling with your eyes) is a great subtle but awesome way to do it...you should make eye contact a lot while smiling but don't stare or be creepy about it... also try to act cute and bubbly if that's fitting to you...everyone has a thing that will feel normal and therefore be easier and work better for them...ignoring the obvious difference in sexuality between these examples, being cute, bubbly and girly may be a great way for the Olsen twins to flirt but if Ellen Degenerous tries to do the same it probably wont be her style and feel comfortable and therefore won't work very well...so find out what flirting style fits you...are you an exotic somewhat overtly sensual woman? Are you a somewhat more dominant, independent woman who knows what she wants and is bold and direct? A shy kinda nerdy girl? or cute and bubbly girly girl....anyways basic tips in a nut shell...if in person wait for some kinda signal or opportunity before you try it...smile a lot, make eye contact, maybe grab there hand to see there "awesome watch"... and lastly find out what is most comfortable to you and what seems "natural" and go with it....do NOT over do it, at least not at first....good luck! oh and one last thing if all else fails theres always the bend and snap!! lol jk jk.. :laugh:
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stephaniec

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suzifrommd

I have the same issue. I find when I'm confident of my own attractiveness, flirting just comes naturally. When I'm not feeling attractive, it's darn near impossible.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?
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Emily E

Here are some of my suggestions... some of this may seem obvious

If you have just seen them (like across the room or table) feel good about yourself and look at them a couple times while looking around (so your not just staring) and when they catch your eye look down suddenly letting them know they caught you looking and smile to yourself (look embarrassed) as you look back up at them (letting them know your interested). 

If your talking to them in a group situation make lots of eye contact (not a freaky lot but keep looking at them) and smile and be attentive when they speak and when you talk look at them and smile a lot (like they are the only one there your interested in).

When talking directly to them (one on one) smile and make lots of eye contact and listen to what they say like there is nothing more interesting in the world, play with your hair a little or lightly slide your fingers across your skin or shirt running them down to your breasts (this will draw there eyes there... don't play with your breasts this isn't a show... be discrete this should only take a second or less) and if your close to then touch them a little while you talk (on the hand, arm, or shoulder... don't grab hold of them just light natural touching)

Always give complements

I'll struggle hard today to live the life I want tomorrow !

Step One - Lose the weight!



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Wild Flower

As a female (I'm in guy-mode to boot), I don't flirt first. I rely on the guy to flirt with me, since if he can't flirt with me then I don't want to risk being the fool in the social interaction (as a gay male, or transgender... can't afford that). Now, that doesn't put me off the market, it just makes things trickier.

Now, if the guy show me a slight interest, and I have a crush on him.... but really the first indicator he's into you is HIS EYES. You have to watch for this, since it's very subtle... a guy who is attracted to you; his pupils will enlarge. 99% of the guys whose eyes enlarge are attracted to me.  Besides a lot of other things... he will want to touch you, more than the average person. He will find ways to spend time with you.

You really don't have to flirt
, since a guy who likes you will like you for your looks. Looks mean everything to men. If you have the right look, you will get the guy. Opposites attract. Tall men=short women. Short men=tall women. Fat=skinny. Skinny=fat (like Anna Nicole).

Clothing wise; red, whites, and pinks (black if you're fat). Those are the 3 standards. Make it match too. High heels (3 inch). Perfumes; copulins; pheromones. Put on lipstick, and eyemake up... (as a guy.... yeah couldn't do this, but I bite my lips before meeting a guy I like/pinch my cheeks, and I dab a little mineral oil on my eyes, and then darken my eyebrows just a little bit). This works to overall feminize you. Wear simple necklace, never anything to take the attention from your own beauty.

Okay, flirting, use sexual indecency.... like have a blouse missing one button (exposing slight cleavage), or have a tear in your stockings, anything to hint to sex.

----
conversation wise.... too much work to talk about here,

read The Satanic Witch by Anton LaVey, book is a miracle for seduction (I had men fall in love with me with this book in minutes).
The Art of Seduction, by Robert Green is a good book too.


------------------

I don't look at any guy.... I don't flirt. I let my look speak for me. I don't flirt because I don't want people at work talking about me... I don't give anyone any reason to talk about me behind my back as far as being a whore.
"Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves all he gets."
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Ms Grace

I knew a cis woman who was a huge flirt. I knew she was only kidding but it could be incredibly confusing for men who didn't know. She was bright, bubbly, laughed, found innuendo in everything in a way that made you think she was hot for you. Like I say, very confusing.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D
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katrinaw

Initially act coy and cute, flash the eyes, making contact without staring, once attention has been captured shuffle a little as though you want  to get closer or engage...

Well no expert, yet! But remember observing the subtle attracting and engaging many times before... Can't wait to test it out  >:-)

Of course sometimes the quiet one just looking around can reap the benefits too...

L Katy  :-*
Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx
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Sarah leah

I think it also depends on the man you like and the context of the situation.

I guess from my own point of view I recently met the most amazing woman in her early thirties at a medical conference and the reason I remember her so vividly was because our interaction were our own, she focused just on me, sharing small whispers and glances, light touches that brushed past but did not linger.  Her capacity to remain still, calm and yet appear in control at all times. So I suppose it is that mixture of paying them all the attention in the world when they have something to say ensuring they are all that matters in that moment and conversely acting mildly coy when you are aware they are looking at you in those moments you catch them peeking.

Mostly Dr. testosterone wants wild unbridled sex and at the sometime his inner self just want to be held, carried for and respected. They are complex creatures indeed!


A straight line may be the shortest distance between two points, but it is by no means the most interesting
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Sabrina

I've never been a flirt either in male or female mode. However, one thing I have learned is people like to talk about themselves so listening is key. After they give you some information, use that to work with. One benefit we have is we were born biologically male and have lived in the male role at some point. This gives us insight and allows us to see into the dark hearts of man... or at least I can.
- Sabrina

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