Every group has its issues but as a community what do we need to fight for?


--'
Im brewing up this house idea to help homeless trans people. Food/water provided.

Why, we need a drama academy, of course!

equality within our society.

I am currently creating a program for primary school kids aged 7-11years that talks about transgender people and what it means. However I need to push it past the school boards to see it used. But the one school my kids attend are open to a "visit" to test it on a small group of 20 kids.

We have a community?

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on May 25, 2015, 02:59:27 AM
We have a community?

Ye! The more you get into TG politics (and LGBTI) Lateral Violence keeps raising its ugly head.

Quote from: Cindy on May 25, 2015, 03:09:30 AM
Ye! The more you get into TG politics (and LGBTI) Lateral Violence keeps raising its ugly head.

I guess it is more in regional/global sense then... Last time, I convinced our local and only LGBT NGO that running a TG support would be cool idea and they even gave us premises and time-schedule, the first meeting was attended by 3 people and two people (the same) came to the second one. I have to say that none of those who came were in any need of support or guidance, but we were ready to provide it for anyone else. So, it dawned pretty early that either this kind of undertaking is not interesting to anyone and there is no use to run such events in the future, or that there is no community, per se, or that we are unable to reach out or figure out possible avenues for doing so to those people out there (who should be "out there" statistically, but we never get to see them).

To be honest, I often feel very frustrated when dealing with anything related to local "transgender community" - like being asked about stuff and whatnot... I just reply what I think might be reasonable, because I would not be able to get any sort of feedback from other people... Sometimes I go with the common sense, sometimes info which I picked up here proves to be invaluable (tnx, Susans!), but most often things which work out elsewhere do not seem to be working here - and the other way around (I know this sounds crazy, but it is kind of local rule with regard to other stuff as well..).

We ran a meet up on Saturday afternoon and managed to get 20 people. It was very noticeable that I was the only woman who had finished her journey which is a shame because those starting do want to know what obstacles there where and how to overcome them. Sadly so many who complete their path just want to fade into life.

This is a half baked idea but I grew up in the school of hard knocks but some of todays kids are transitioning while in grade school or high school. My tormentors were inside while these kids have external tormentors. Perhaps we could become some sort of anti bulling squad where we make ourselves available for school presentations. We could do a far better job of describing the pain these kids feel than the kids can. I think if the bullies could feel the pain these kids are in they might not only leave the kids alone but they might befriend the kid. I payed a high price to get where I am today but what help I can provide to others with my experience will be provided for free so they don't suffer as much as I did. After all, what good will these things I have be to others if I don't pass them on before I pass away?

I think that many of us trans folk really just want to be accepted in the mainstream. That's how I feel, at least.

So, the motivation isn't really there too seek out a trans community, beyond the already excellent scope we have on the net.

I have to laugh at social events etc, when people feel driven to 'introduce the transsexuals' to each other.

Of course they mean well. It's very awkward though. Just because I am trans, it doesn't mean I will have a lot in common with every other trans person :~o

Quote from: Cindy on May 25, 2015, 03:35:52 AM
We ran a meet up on Saturday afternoon and managed to get 20 people. It was very noticeable that I was the only woman who had finished her journey which is a shame because those starting do want to know what obstacles there where and how to overcome them. Sadly so many who complete their path just want to fade into life.

I suspect that many locals who fully transitioned left the country and moved to the UK and other Western European countries out of sheer frustration or in search for better living conditions. So we probably have a generation gap (or two) - we have older non-/ and transitioners (mostly non-, because that is the Soviet generation where such topics were taboo and there was no info available), there there is middle generation which either started early, got done with their business and left (I am somewhere there too, but I have supporting working conditions) or are in non-transitioning state, and younger generation who are either dealing with things by themselves, and sometimes entering adult industries, or not dealing with them at all due to continuous lack of info... That's the impression which I had when I tried to analyse various data which other people told me or what I learned my self (mostly browsing older and current internet resources).
Sometimes, I really envy You people in the US and Oz, but then again, with such visibility and lots of info that You are having, it is much harder to blend in because people are aware about transgender people, how to spot them etc etc etc. Here, people have no idea about what being transgender or transsexual means, and have out-dated and prejudicial misconceptions, which allows for those of us who are lucky, to blend in. If You are seen as a female with some masculine traits, noone will question Your gender or presentation - they would rather assume that You are lesbian than that You might be trans (because transpeople are supposed to look like burly dudes in female dress with overdone makeup and bad taste of fashion - yeah, that's what they really think...).

Emily, I think that s very true. Certainly in Oz people (with exceptions) don't have any issues with trans*people. Obviously I'm well accepted socially and professionally, but I am known as trans*.

It doesn't bother me in the slightest but I can see that younger girls do get upset that they are seen as 'odd' or maybe as the 'token' trans*person invited to a party etc.

"Oh aren't we accepting! One of our friends is transgender just like Bruce Jenner"

< I could go into a rant but wont >

Quote from: Cindy on May 25, 2015, 03:54:07 AM
Emily, I think that s very true. Certainly in Oz people (with exceptions) don't have any issues with trans*people. Obviously I'm well accepted socially and professionally, but I am known as trans*.

It doesn't bother me in the slightest but I can see that younger girls do get upset that they are seen as 'odd' or maybe as the 'token' trans*person invited to a party etc.

"Oh aren't we accepting! One of our friends is transgender just like Bruce Jenner"

< I could go into a rant but wont >

Uh huh - I remember reading somewhere that currently "having a transgender friend is kinda the new hip..."

Sigh...

On the other hand, I cannot complain about my old closest male friends and closest acquaintances (I am going for a dinner with one of them tonight, btw) - they took it well, I am seen as a weird circus animal, and they are slowly but willingly re-learning how to treat me now .

A community?  Well, a very fractured and dispersed one maybe...?

As mentioned earlier, one of our key goals as people is just to disappear at some point and become an unquestioned member of our chosen gender.  This makes the whole concept of community rather complicated, since who will lead and for how long, and philosophically at least, when are we defined as being part of it?

I'd venture that we are always part of it, but we have no obligation of be part of it.  So it leaves the situation in the hands of a few people with a political or militant persuasion (and I mean this positively) or else in the hands of some groups such as NGOs or foundations.  This isn't quite the same as a sense of community.

We've had debates before about how we've hitched our cart to the LGB collective, but this isn't really the place for us, unless we happen to be a lesbian trans woman or a gay trans man.  Even then, knowing people in a prominent LGB grouping here in Spain, the sense of community isn't great, and a fair part of the effort is largely internal politics and infighting - a microcosm of larger politics.  Not really a community at all.

I think the best we can hope for is the occasional high-profile person who galvanises others for a time into some sense of community,  and is willing to be a poster boy/girl for the rest of us.

Hugs
Julia

Quote from: Wild Flower on May 24, 2015, 09:07:56 PM
Every group has its issues but as a community what do we need to fight for?

* Safety from violence and harassment
* An end to employment and housing discrimination
* Acceptance of trans youth by families and religious institutions
* A path to correct documentation of our gender
* Humane treatment by police
* An end to gatekeeping mental health care
* Medical treatment based on an understanding of our physical condition
* Bathroom rights
* Military Service
* Negative portrayals in media
* Insurance coverage for transition related care
* Curing widespread ignorance about us and our condition

I could go on, but I don't want to fill up Susan's server.

Quote from: suzifrommd on May 25, 2015, 04:47:40 AM
* Safety from violence and harassment
* An end to employment and housing discrimination
* Acceptance of trans youth by families and religious institutions
* A path to correct documentation of our gender
* Humane treatment by police
* An end to gatekeeping mental health care
* Medical treatment based on an understanding of our physical condition
* Bathroom rights
* Military Service
* Negative portrayals in media
* Insurance coverage for transition related care
* Curing widespread ignorance about us and our condition

I could go on, but I don't want to fill up Susan's server.

There are many issues that are important, but I think the most important thing we can do right now is show that we are normal people with the same feelings, issues, needs and wants that every other person is subjected to.  In other words, the trans community needs to have a human face to it rather than being an abstract  concept that people are vaguely aware of but don't understand in reality.  Once we are understood and humanized, I think the other things will slowly improve.  It's not really an issue persay, but I think having more trans voices out there is important to improving everything else and having some sense of community,  even a fragmented one such as ours, provides more forums for people to speak and allows more people to learn.  So Im personally happy there is some sort of trans community that exists to show rhat we are normal people regardless of differinf life circumstances or views.  That is what pushed the gay community forward and what will push us forward one day.  I guess for me its less about political  activis and focusing  on individual issues,though I agree it's important, and more about showing why they should support them.

Quote from: Dena on May 25, 2015, 03:38:22 AM
Perhaps we could become some sort of anti bulling squad where we make ourselves available for school presentations.

This already happens in the UK, some of my friends are involved in it:

http://www.diversityrolemodels.org/

not really into the community enough that if you asked me, I'd say "I have no clue but you can go ask someone else." really though its the stigmas that need to be quashed that surround our kind.

Sent from my VS985 4G using Tapatalk

Quote from: Dena on May 25, 2015, 03:38:22 AM
This is a half baked idea but I grew up in the school of hard knocks but some of todays kids are transitioning while in grade school or high school. My tormentors were inside while these kids have external tormentors. Perhaps we could become some sort of anti bulling squad where we make ourselves available for school presentations. We could do a far better job of describing the pain these kids feel than the kids can. I think if the bullies could feel the pain these kids are in they might not only leave the kids alone but they might befriend the kid. I payed a high price to get where I am today but what help I can provide to others with my experience will be provided for free so they don't suffer as much as I did. After all, what good will these things I have be to others if I don't pass them on before I pass away?

Check your reputation points, +1 for that!

Hugs, Devlyn

Another complication. The best adjustment after surgery is to move back in the community and never be heard from again or at least that was the old school interpretation of the issue and many of us did just that. We didn't have the internet to use as a soap box and the only way to get the word out was to be a Christine Jorgensen or a Rene Richards. Both of them had far more exposure than they ever wanted and lost part of their private life. The only way I was able to find the proper information was to track down a hard to find therapy group of which there were very few. The web has change so much in this area and nobody is farther away from help than a Google search. There is even another site like this that has suicide prevention as part of it's goal. Because most it is behind security I wasn't sure if they would want an old timer like me behind the wall and I wasn't sure what I would do back there because couldn't see what was on the other side.

We need to first define if is healthy for us to be public after surgery when what we say we want is just to be normal. This could mean redefining what normal really is for us. As for me, my surgery is currently at the half way point in my life. If somebody were to tell me they alter the past and have me be born a girl or a boy without the problems I had to deal with at the expense of the memories that made me what I am, my response would be leave me alone. I am a product of all the pain I went through and all the pleasure I have had in the current one. I wouldn't give up a minute of it.
After I found my place in the world I have felt a need to help others avoid some of the pain I had to deal with. I don't want to go public, but I don't mind working at a lesser level giving whatever help I can. For a long time this wasn't possible because treatment groups don't want a bunch of other hanging around when they are trying to treat people. Again with the internet that has all changed. We can have our privacy and still help other as much as we want.

For those of you who are new to gender treatment I hope I was able to shine a little light on how much things have changed in half my life and I expect a good deal more change over the next 30 to 40 years as we are able to detect children with issues at a much younger age.