My baby sister and I are very close, during the recent storms when I was freaking out about not being able to reach a friend. She drove me up into the rain effected area at night to 'rescue them' (and my sanity). I am her big sister aunt to her 4yr old. When she's sick and not being normal the one who tries to pull her into line and has great pleasure in telling her "I told you so". Plus help her choose outfits for when she goes out, and vis a vie. We have this bond as we don't have much a relationship with our mother and the family we talk to is interstate.


Mum has never accepted me being trans. Her last words on the subject where "I'll support you, but others won't"
"Don't tell any of my family until I've had a chance to deal"

Since Christmas I've been trying to catch up with mum, to show her how happier I've become and that people do see and accept me as the women I am. Texts have either been left unanswered, oh I'm busy. Phone calls ring out.

My nephew's birthday is coming up and mum should be there. Part of me is glad because it will give me a chance to see her. The other down right scared I haven't been seen as male since November, and even out at children's party I will still be seen as one of the girls. (With my clothing and style I'll probably be seen as a bigger kid  ). My sister's friends who will be there have known me as her sister from the start without any problems
Why, when will mum be able to accept this is me

good luck

It is really up to your Mom to come to terms. She may need to go through the 5 stages of grief. Seeing that you are who you are over time may drive home the fact that you will not be returning to your former self. 

So patience and time, just patience and time.

This may take some time. My nephew's birthday will be the only family gathering we will both be attending. When we where both at his first day of school this year. Mum dodged our offer of going out for lunch after.

Sigh

Avoidance tactics by others are a pain - so many (not very good) excuses. They don.'t mean to avoid, they just have "trouble" getting used to things. I hope this works itself through for you - they will get round to it.

Yep and Yep. Patience and time truly are the key. I agree with others that letting her see your authentic self couldn't hurt, but in the end time and patience  are all you can really do. Good luck and hugs
Mariah

Quote from: immortal gypsy on May 24, 2015, 02:12:24 AM
So patience and time, just patience and time.

This may take some time. My nephew's birthday will be the only family gathering we will both be attending. When we where both at his first day of school this year. Mum dodged our offer of going out for lunch after.

Sigh

I received a call from my sweet loving sister.

"Don't take this the wrong way, but what are you wearing to nephew's birthday? "
When asked why she replied because mum would be there, and other family members all who may not have seen me but I have told.

It's almost winter, temperature averaging of 20ºC during the day. That's jeans and a light jumper weather generally no matter what gender you are, and it's a kids party at a play center for Cuthlu sake. Not a place to be dressed up.

"Don't take this the wrong way". Umm sorry I think I have. How else was I supposed to take it, I know it's her son's party but she should know me by now I thought we where closer that she shouldn't of had to ask

I'd go with what makes YOU comfortable.  If that means some femme-unisex items like jeans and a jumper, do it!  You don't have to be wearing a dress to be a woman.  Just wear some nice wedges and light makeup and put a clip in your hair or something.  Accessorize! 

I'm really not one to be talking here I guess as I'm still shopping for clothes.  I think I have 2 dresses, 2 tops, a pair of jeans and pair of slacks.  Not much variety.  No accessories, and my hair isn't long enough to put anything in I don't think, heh.  I'm not out to anyone that I'm comfortable enough to dress up around either except at the LGBT center.  But, my point is, your mom knows, your sister knows, and if you're comfortable being dressed female around half of the people there, then that's all that matters, the other half can stuff it if they have a problem.  You can't please ALL the people ALL the time, remember that.  Might as well give them a crash course, it's not going to get any easier on them, and no point in making yourself unhappy just to please SOME of the people there.

Well, maybe she was a little concerned that you'd show up in 9" heels with ultra mini skirt and extreme low cut blouse  with  bee hive hair . 

Well the party has been and gone. In jeans and a hoodie (it was cool at the Foot of the mountains) I was always called called my nephew's aunty during the party, which was nice.

As for my mother well she kept her distance. I tried to talk to her and some small talk was made, ( mostly about supergirl and her trip away that I heard about second hand). I told her we need to catch up soon, whether she agrees and follows through we will see. Time will tell

Hugs Gypsy.

Family!!!

At least you are getting some support everyone can build on that.

Sounds like things are starting to head in the direction support wise from your family Hugs
Mariah