Hey everybody, I'm Jen.  31 years old. Happily Married to my beautiful wife for 8 years with 3 kids.  I have dealt with my gender issues since I was about 6 years old. They seemed to come and go but it has been stronger for the last year and I feel like my next step would be to talk to a gender therapist.  I'll be honest, suicide has been on my mind a lot lately but reading these forums has given me hope and made me feel like I'm not alone.  My wife knows I am trans and has for a long time. Right now she completely supports me and understands that when I seek help what it could mean, but says that doesn't matter. I know she is bi so I guess that helps.  I guess I just wanted to say hello and that I'm glad to be here!

Welcome to Susan's

Suicide is not the answer. Your family needs you. Please make an appointment with the gender therapist.

The feeling of freedom from hrt, talking with a gender therapist and being yourself is well worth the temporary discomfort of transition. 

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Hi Jen, welcome to Susan's.  I'm glad your wife is supportive. A therapist would be a good next step, but if you feel like your going to do certain things then by all means one of the help lines would be the next step.I look forward to seeing you around the forums. good luck and Hugs
Mariah

Thanks for the reply.  I realize suicide is not the answer.  I was super depressed and felt completely alone but thanks to kind words from strangers I no longer feel that way.  Thanks for the links too.

Hello and welcome

You could have a look here:
https://www.susans.org/Healthcare/Therapists_and_Counselors/USA/Colorado/

A therapist is a good idea imo... they could help you along...
if they are not supportive simply look for another...
here were some pointers concerning therapists:
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,189675.msg1688385.html#msg1688385

You might additionally ask for counseling at plannedparenthood or an lgbt center...
and there might be support groups...


And if you feel like it please remember to reach out...
you can call or chat here for example:
glbthotline dot org/hotline.html
thetrevorproject dot org


*hugs*

Thank you all so much for making me feel welcome.  I hopened I can help make a positive impact here someday.

Jen, I joined Susan's a bit more than three years ago. Best thing I ever did. I had hundreds of friends that helped me decide that I needed to transition and then turn me into a fabulous woman beyond my possible dreams. Hold on tight. It's an exciting ride. I hope you can learn to see past your depression. Depression is an illusion that shows you a world that is hopeless and difficult and hides from you the things that make life special.

Welcome, and please keep moving forward.

Thank you Suzi, I have definitely been working on my depression. I was honestly in denial that I even was depressed until just a few months ago.  I can tell you that by not keeping my true self bottled up anymore it has helped a lot.  I have been reading these forums for several weeks and I feel like I am at home now.   At this point im not really sure what route I am going to go but I know that it needs to be a part of my life in some way.   I truly appreciate your comment!

P.S. to admin, I am sorry I did not realize there was an area to post intros. 

Welcome JenAco. I hope your enjoy your stay here. Some really nice people here. It sound like your wife loves you very much. So don't beat yourself up to much.
I'm transgender and maybe one day I'll go from MTF. I married for 16 years  now with two kids. But my wife want a divorce. But still want to  be my best friend and support me. And that was a month ago and still married? Who know whats going on with us.

Thanks revan,  my wife wasn't supportive at first but she made up for it.  Sometimes I think it's just a matter of her coming to terms and gaining understanding.  I wish you the best of luck girl, and I hope it works out

Welcome to Susan's Place. I reached the point of suicide and the only thought that stopped me was the fact I hadn't attempted getting medical treatment. It was a few days latter I came out and start the long path to get where I am today. Your wife supports you and we are here to assist you however we can so I think you can resolve your problems and find a happy life. There will be problems but we will help you to move forward.

The cycling of discomfort is not uncommon but you have to remember that you are on the road to a cure and the discomfort you have now will not always be with you.

If I can help you, feel free to let me know.

Hi Jen!
Colorado has fantastic resources! Namely Denver, PM me and I can lead you to a couple things I know! Glad you found Susans!

Dierdre

Thanks for sharing and the offer of help Dena, I appreciate it.

It's hard for me to share some of these things and I'm glad I'm jot the only one here. It all seems too good to be true.    I've actually opened up quite a bit and have came out to a few more people and a Co worker. 

Dierdre, I will pm you thanks!

Hi Jen!

Welcome to Susan's. I'm relatively new to posting here myself, but have found this place to be a literal, life-saving resource even before I made an account. There are lots of wonderful people on here.

I'm happy to hear that your wife is being so supportive, and I hope that you begin to feel happier soon 

I look forward to seeing you around the forums.

Much love,

Felicity

Thank you Felicity. I am finding what you said to be true already. 

Thank you everyone who has made me feel very welcome.  It is an overwhelming sensation to have so many people take time out and speak to me.  Thank you all

Thank you Jen.

Gladly.  I guess sharing these life experiences and secrets kind of makes us all brothers and sisters or bristers or sothers or something

It can certainly help keep us grounded when we need it.