My transition has decidedly been a success, but everywhere I go I feel like I'm some kind of walking museum piece. I guess if I liked men I would have something to be thankful for?

I don't even feel flattered. It's invasive. I'm not even wearing anything revealing, just jeans, booties, a fitted tanktop. I have small breasts I'm not curvy. But still, every male out there acts like it's their right to procreate and everything is fair game. The glances, being "cute" thinking you're impressed, holding doors open (why do I have to feel like I need to walk faster to oblige you?) lingering around the produce section holding a lemon and staring at it like you've never seen a lemon before (seriously I know your lingering planning a pickup line and I've sensed it walking abruptly away in the opposite direction of you), oh and then there's all the normal street bs girls go through.

Seriously yo, when I go out I feel like a cell and bacteria is swarming around me.

Feeling meh lately, because, if it was *women* doing this, instead....

The bane of the hot girl.  It sounds to me like these are the good kind of problems to have.

Be careful what you ask for.  As sure as the sun will rise in the morning and the day will fade away into night, we will all grow older, our looks will fade, and we will wistfully remember these days when we turned heads every time we walked by.

Let them have their furtive glance.  The sight of you in the grocery store might just be the highlight of their entire day.

Hugs!

^^ I'm not used to this attention. I tend to sweat in the summer, and being glanced at only raises my anxiety *and* my perspiration.

I know I've aced passing, but even these glances makes you feel somehow unsure. You know what that means?

Yup. More anxiety. All I want to do is finish shopping asap, and just go home!

Unless you're getting confused glances, this is simply proof that you are 1) passing and 2) attractive as a woman. I understand you not liking the attention. I have become accustomed to this kind of sexualised gaze from men--especially older men--in urban areas in particular. I get harassed often, at times propositioned. I had to learn how to be more aware of my body in space, so I could better sense who was where, for my own safety. It's just part of being a woman who looks a certain way in certain social spaces, unfortunately. Be safe, and try to take it as a compliment, if you can, about your appearance, even if it is demeaning on the part of the men doing it.

Gab, all of this makes me understand why lesbians dress the way they do.

My favorite is going to the carwash.  Without fail, every single time, as I'm watching the guys vacuum and polish my car, some old geezer will sidle up close to me and say, "That's my Mercedes 500SL over there."  To which I usually say something like, "That's a very nice car."  And the old guy almost always follows up with, "Maybe I could take you for a ride sometime."

They can't help it.  It's kind of cute as long as it doesn't cross the line into creepy.  Well,  okay, sometimes creepy can be fun too, depending on my mood.  (I'm weird and flirty that way; what can I say?)

You'll get used to it, Evelyn... perhaps a few years down the line.  It simply is.

Hey Miharu, ughhhhhhhhhhh.

OKI - btw I'm also looking to get some ink on my arm too. Yeh thas rit! This dorky glasses wearing chick!



Something like that, maybe a two-tone arrangement.

I never liked tattoos, but after transition, I'm strangely much more open to it. It's one way lesbians can identify each other I guess. I also see it as another way to claim my body as MY OWN because I've branded it and men cannot own it (most hetero-normal guys aren't married to tattoo'd up bitches for this reason) - so hopefully lending myself some further shielding from the male gaze.

Ever thought about "downgrading" Your dressing habits, babe? It used to bother me, because some random jerks would catcall no matter what I wear - now I just dont care anymore. I kinda dress the "lesbian" way and if I see them staring, I look back, straight into their eyes - it gives some weird feeling of strength and empowerment .

I highly encourage you to get inked, Evelyn.  But don't count on tattoos to shield you from the unwanted attention of men.

I have a half-sleeve tattoo on both of my arms (shoulder to elbow), and still I'm bound to get my butt squeezed nearly every time I walk into a pool hall.  I really don't mind it though; it keeps the guys from getting too cranky as I beat the crap out of them at the pool table.  I make it work for me.

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on June 11, 2015, 02:30:01 PM
Ever thought about "downgrading" Your dressing habits, babe? It used to bother me, because some random jerks would catcall no matter what I wear - now I just dont care anymore. I kinda dress the "lesbian" way and if I see them staring, I look back, straight into their eyes - it gives some weird feeling of strength and empowerment .

I was wearing basically

<---- THAT

The same with an open button shirt. Except a much smaller bust. Just regular pedestrian looking clothes.

Don't want to even acknowledge their existence with a stare. Seriously, they might get funny ideas. They think everything is an invitation to inject themselves into your personal space and thinking.

Yeah Miharu, I'm drooling at the artwork on tumblr. Gals with tattoos are way hot!

Maybe I'll get "Time is money. Money is power. Power is pizza. Pizza is knowledge." written in romantic script down the length of my arm. lol

I'm looking forward to it quite honestly. I'm not attracted to men at all, but I still think it would be awesome to be the hot chick.

I wasn't aware that tattoos would "shield" you from attention though. I'm planning on getting one on my arm of a butterfly and maybe a couple others, but only cutesy tattoos. My stylist has a few of them and I think she looks cute even with them.

Well, for me that's very very feminine style of clothing . Aaaand, right stare wont give them any ideas - just make it cold enough and dont stare more than 3-4 secs. They either break away, or I go on with my business. On the other side, I am 5 feet 9 inches which is on the higher height range for local women, so guys probably get intimidated .

Do you carry a purse Emily?

I'm starting to wonder if a purse (I wear a black leather coach cross-body, nothing too complicated) actually makes me look too fem and vulnerable.

Nope, it's denim backpack (female/unisex) for me, because I have way too much stuff to carry around. One hand on the strap, the other on the hip = "dont even think about it, bugger" - my avi pretty much knocks down my everyday look.

Quote from: awilliams1701 on June 11, 2015, 03:26:27 PM
I'm looking forward to it quite honestly. I'm not attracted to men at all, but I still think it would be awesome to be the hot chick.

I wasn't aware that tattoos would "shield" you from attention though. I'm planning on getting one on my arm of a butterfly and maybe a couple others, but only cutesy tattoos. My stylist has a few of them and I think she looks cute even with them.

You'll get there But like me, being "careful what you wish for" isn't such a far fetched saying after all!

And it's the summer, I think it's just open season on women as well.

I carry a purse and wear feminine dresses. I get transgender attention, but not female attention. I don't pass and I know it. I'm only at 6 months though.

Quote from: Evelyn K on June 11, 2015, 03:16:43 PM
Maybe I'll get "Time is money. Money is power. Power is pizza. Pizza is knowledge." written in romantic script down the length of my arm. lol

Cute!  My next tattoo will be down the back of my right forearm.  It will read:  "Never Trust Anyone Over 30  40  50  60"

Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on June 11, 2015, 03:33:32 PM
Nope, it's denim backpack (female/unisex) for me, because I have way too much stuff to carry around. One hand on the strap, the other on the hip = "dont even think about it, bugger".

Oh I see.

I do dress on the more feminine side of androgyny, just matches my passability. Nothing overly feminine or bOmBshEll GlAmOroUs. But still cheeky enough to compliment my level of presentation.

I feel like I shouldn't have to sacrifice the slightly prettier stuff if I didn't want to. I guess I understand where the "you're inviting yourself to rape" kind of thing that the feminists have been arguing all this time.

Ummm, if You are somewhere remotely close to that picture which You provided, then I would not call it "close to androgyny", nope, I would not .