I met a girl. She invited me to hers for a chat, and I thought it was all friendly. When I left she decided to walk me part way home, then she kissed me. Lots.

It's worth noting the following:

1. I'd just given up on dating until after SRS (hopefully in 6 months)
2. She's gorgeous
3. I don't know if I'm ready for anything but we really click.
4. She's gorgeous
5. She knows I'm trans.

Trying to process it right now, I didn't think anyone would find me attractive, no girls were ever this interested in me when I was a guy. I don't want to be overly keen. I know I'm going to overthink this now!! If anyone can find a negative in this, it's me!

I'd say try to relax, be yourself and enjoy the time

Congratulations


hugs

  Well, you've always seemed like a really awesome person to me so obviously she must see it too!  What have you got to lose in this if you weren't planning on dating anyone right now anyway?  If it goes awry then it doesn't matter and at least you had some fun right?  I'd kill to be in your situation but I know I'd be thinking the same way too - your last paragraph has me written all over it.  I'd be struggling like crazy with it as well.

  Maybe it's like people say - it's the moment when you don't seek it any more that girls finally take notice.  Even if it barely goes beyond this point you're still significantly luckier than I am.  SO JEALOUS!   Gawd, I need a girlfriend...

congrats

Quote from: Violet Bloom on June 19, 2015, 06:42:56 PM
  Well, you've always seemed like a really awesome person to me so obviously she must too!  What have you got to lose in this if you weren't planning on dating anyone right now anyway?  If it goes awry then it doesn't matter and at least you had some fun right?  I'd kill to be in your situation but I know I'd be thinking the same way too - your last paragraph has me written all over it.  I'd be struggling like crazy with it as well.

  Maybe it's like people say - it's the moment when you don't seek it any more that girls finally take notice.  Even if it barely goes beyond this point you're still significantly luckier than I am.  SO JEALOUS!   Gawd, I need a girlfriend...

I'm glad it's not just me!! I'm trying not to let my mind run away from me, but it's difficult. I really like her but I'd decided that she was out of my league and accepted that nothing was going to happen... and then it did. It was a lot of fun but I was so nervous about messing it up that I don't think I relaxed and just went with it.

I know it sounds ridiculous stressing over this but I have had one long relationship in my life and have been single for the last two years so I don't have much experience to draw on. I want to just go with the flow (But don't say it doesn't matter anymore  ). I find it hard to switch off my brain in these situations, and it's well known that my brain is my mortal enemy. I wasn't ready for a relationship so I guess I should have nothing to lose but it's rare that someone I like this much shows an interest in me. It was one of those evenings that only happens once or twice in a decade or two.

PS thanks for the lovely compliment

Congrats! Sounds like a very good start!

Congrats. it's sounds like a wonderful start. People can surprise us sometimes. Hugs
Mariah

Quote...and it's well known that my brain is my mortal enemy.

That would make an awesome signature!

Lucky you! I was almost in the same boat but things didn't work out.

Go for it!

What have you got to lose?

(hint: answer is nuffin!)

Well I guess a broken heart - but they heal with time.

I feel like I have no chance until I'm post-op. Unfortunately for me that's 2 years or more away. I know of one person who is awesome enough to deal with it, but I don't see how I would fit into her life, she's 10 years younger than me, and I don't think she's interested.

Your situation gives me some hope. I'm glad for you.

Congratulations. I hope it works out.

...

Ok, I'm a little envious. I hope something like that happens to me one day.  Still, I'm happy for you.

Hi Squircle,

Congrats and enjoy the time....

Put any thoughts to the back of your mind and be in the moment, you deserve your happiness.

L Katy 

Quote from: Squircle on June 19, 2015, 07:24:38 PM
I'm glad it's not just me!! I'm trying not to let my mind run away from me, but it's difficult. I really like her but I'd decided that she was out of my league and accepted that nothing was going to happen... and then it did. It was a lot of fun but I was so nervous about messing it up that I don't think I relaxed and just went with it.

I know it sounds ridiculous stressing over this but I have had one long relationship in my life and have been single for the last two years so I don't have much experience to draw on. I want to just go with the flow (But don't say it doesn't matter anymore  ). I find it hard to switch off my brain in these situations, and it's well known that my brain is my mortal enemy. I wasn't ready for a relationship so I guess I should have nothing to lose but it's rare that someone I like this much shows an interest in me. It was one of those evenings that only happens once or twice in a decade or two.

PS thanks for the lovely compliment

  Oh, that damned brain, eh - This sounds sooooooooo much like me... except that I'm not getting mauled by a gorgeous girl!   Apparently you're living everyone's dream here.  (I suppose we aren't making this any easier for you! )

P.S.  I see from your blog that up until recently you had been seriously trying to put yourself out there.  Goes back to my point of when you stop trying, that's when it finally happens.  I'm in that mindset now but nobody's hunting me down... yet.

Thanks for the encouragement everyone. I've just woken up and it feels like my thoughts are a big jumbly mess, but I'm a bit calmer than I was. I think more than anything I'm just trying not to get my hopes up and enjoy living in the moment. She seems like a really nice person and I think it's important that I don't take anything for granted and also don't put pressure on her.

The obvious elephant in the room is that I can't entertain the thought of having sex with anyone until after srs. Hopefully that's only 5/6 months away.

This happened to my foster daughter, (who came to us for shelter and guidance when her rather religious birth family couldnt handle her being trans). I told her to just go with the flow, let her lover take the lead, and not to make any rules about what could or could not happen.

It worked out well, and although they are now both with different life partners (she's now long since postop) I think they both took strength and comfort from the relationship which is all that matters. So I wish you every happiness and blessing from this. Don't be affraid. All will be well if you let it.

  It's kinda like you found a unicorn but you're too afraid to touch it because something mystically bad might happen.

Quote from: Squircle on June 20, 2015, 02:44:34 AM
Thanks for the encouragement everyone. I've just woken up and it feels like my thoughts are a big jumbly mess, but I'm a bit calmer than I was. I think more than anything I'm just trying not to get my hopes up and enjoy living in the moment. She seems like a really nice person and I think it's important that I don't take anything for granted and also don't put pressure on her.

The obvious elephant in the room is that I can't entertain the thought of having sex with anyone until after srs. Hopefully that's only 5/6 months away.

  Yes, I think that's entirely the right attitude, especially considering you can't be sure in what way exactly she might want to engage sexually with you, if it does get to that point.  My genitals don't bother me that much really, it's just that any attention paid to them isn't going to lead to any satisfaction for me and I don't like the feeling of erections.  If the girl doesn't care what you've got and they are considerate and skilled-enough to make it work for you, can it really be that bad?  I struggle to envision ever finding a lesbian that isn't penis-phobic or anyone else that isn't more interested in penis than how to get me off right.  But certainly anyone willing to enthusiastically try probably isn't going to get turned away by me.  Whenever that might ever happen...

  Don't make me come across the pond and steal your woman!   (Beware, I'm just as cute and odd-ball as you!)

Quote from: Violet Bloom on June 20, 2015, 11:11:13 AM
  Don't make me come across the pond and steal your woman!   (Beware, I'm just as cute and odd-ball as you!)

Stay back! I'm sure I have enough competition as it is!! 

She already knows that I'm not OK with having sex whilst I still have my male parts. It's looking likely that I will be getting my surgery at the end of this year so after that it won't be a problem. I don't know if this girl will still be in the picture then, I can't help but hope, but for all I know last night's happenings might not come around again. But at least it's shown me that there's a chance I won't spend the rest of my days alone. I've had more interest in the last 6 months than I ever did as a man. I still worry that I'm somewhat of a novelty for some people but I guess that's something I'll just have to wait and see.

Quote from: Squircle on June 20, 2015, 05:25:49 PM
Stay back! I'm sure I have enough competition as it is!! 

She already knows that I'm not OK with having sex whilst I still have my male parts. It's looking likely that I will be getting my surgery at the end of this year so after that it won't be a problem. I don't know if this girl will still be in the picture then, I can't help but hope, but for all I know last night's happenings might not come around again. But at least it's shown me that there's a chance I won't spend the rest of my days alone. I've had more interest in the last 6 months than I ever did as a man. I still worry that I'm somewhat of a novelty for some people but I guess that's something I'll just have to wait and see.

  I was just recently looking up places to see in Northern Wales and up to Blackpool there on my next trip.  I'll be right on your doorstep! (Seriously, strange coincidence.)  Never fear though - I'd be too worried you'd gut me with a crayon before I even saw you coming.

  Seems to me girls generally don't kiss you half-to-death if they already know sex is out of the question.  Sounds like you're better off than I thought.  But what do I know?  Hopefully it's not the same sort of 'psychosis' that straight women tend to get when they see an unavailable guy with a ring on.  You've mentioned abstaining to her but have you sorted out how she defines her sexuality?  The answer to that question might help gauge the seriousness of her motives.

Quote from: Squircle on June 19, 2015, 06:28:07 PM
I met a girl. She invited me to hers for a chat, and I thought it was all friendly. When I left she decided to walk me part way home, then she kissed me. Lots.

It's worth noting the following:

1. I'd just given up on dating until after SRS (hopefully in 6 months)
2. She's gorgeous
3. I don't know if I'm ready for anything but we really click.
4. She's gorgeous
5. She knows I'm trans.

Trying to process it right now, I didn't think anyone would find me attractive, no girls were ever this interested in me when I was a guy. I don't want to be overly keen. I know I'm going to overthink this now!! If anyone can find a negative in this, it's me!

Squircle! See? I told you, you where going to be fine.

How did you meet her? BTW I'm jealous!