When I was growing up in the 1970s, there wasn't as much information as there is today.  I remember watching a TV show, and they were talking about "transvestites."  It surprised me to learn that society had a label for what I just considered to be who I was.

It's been a slow learning process for me.  I've finally come to realize that when I look at the things I do, and how I face certain situations, they just work better when I view myself as female instead of male.  This is even for things that ostensibly aren't related to gender.  If the medical technology gets better I might consider transitioning, but at this point I'm mainly focused on understanding the psychology of it all.

I'm a computer programmer, entrepreneur, and writer.  I've written a draft of a book that has a transgender heroine.  I've written mainly from the point of view of my personal experience and feelings.  I hope people don't mind if I try to get other points of view on the subjects here.

Thanks.

Hi gwnavier, Welcome to Susan's. I look forward to seeing you around the forums. Good luck and Hugs
Mariah

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Welcome to Susan's Place. I don't have the right feel for you yet so there are three terms you need to understand Transvestite who is a person likes their gender but wants to wear clothes of the opposite gender. Gender Dysphoria is a person that is uncomfortable with aspects of their birth gender and Transexual is a person who wants to change their gender. Often the greeting letter tells me were a person belongs but as you letter didn't have the details to trip my feelings. In any case, what I feel is unimportant as you need to tell us where you fit. You may not know so we are willing to teach and answer your questions so you have the knowledge to decide for yourself. No matter what you are, you are welcome here to explore your feelings and I will be happy to answer any questions I can to help you on your quest. You might note that I have been around a long time with about half my life spent in each role.

On the medical technology, it's pretty good now but is will alway involve a large amount of work to adapt to the opposite gender. Even something as simple as the voice surgery is half surgery and half therapy to learn female speech patterns.

Hello and welcome to Susan's.

Mariah, thank you.  You're too kind.

Gennee, thank you as well.

Dena, when I talk about medical technology getting better, I'm talking about what most people would consider the realm of science fiction.  Things like growing organs from stem cells and even brain transplants.  These things may seem "out there," but there is good reason to believe that such technology could exist in the next few decades.  I said I'm a writer, and write science fiction so I tend to speculate about these things.

I purposely mentioned "transvestite" because I'm curious what other people think about the term.  I think it describes behavior and not an identify.  I think that people who used to be called "transvestites" were mostly transgendered people.  I could be wrong, and of course I said I am seeking other points of view.  I don't know anybody who identifies as a "transvestite," but then again there are certainly  lots of things that I don't know.

Thanks

Hi gwan

Hi, Yenneffer.  I would answer your PM, but I don't have the creds.  The answer is yes, but what I think on the subject is irrelevant.

Hi Gwnavier 

Welcome to Susan's    Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M

Gwnavier I am into science and science fiction and have been most of my life. I lived with a kidney transplant patient and that taught me just how primitive we still are in the transplant area. In addition, you would be surprised how many learned behaviors there are that we have to learn in order not to be detected. These would not be transferred with a brain transplant and would have to be learned in the new body.

You might want to read https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_transsexualism to see that gender dysphoria has a physical cause and in those of us who have it, it's not a choice but the case of a square peg in a round hole. Surgery isn't always the solution for all of us. Some of us are only uncomfortable with part of our body and only changing that may produce enough comfort and relief from the mental pressure that they have a happy life. These people tend not to be sexually active with their original equipment and find other ways to enjoy the company of others. This is a very complex subject and some things have changed in the years after my surgery. I find the people around here have a few things to teach me.

Some of the introduction letters will show you how much pain people can be in when dealing with gender dysphoria. If I hadn't been able to receive treatment, I would not be alive today. Others can handle it better as you will see people 50 and 60 years old facing this for the first time. This is why I am unsure about your dysphoria because even 13 and 14 year olds seem to have a better grasp of the subject than you do. We don't object you you learning about us and we have women coming here for plastic surgery advice as well as significant others here to help family. Just be honest with us while you are here.  We are attempting to save minds and lives here and that can't be interfered with. If you are one of those who needs healing, I apologize for the sharpness of this post and I would be happy to help you with any issues you might have.

Welcome to Susan's gwnavier

Lovely to have you onboard...

Firstly, I knew form a kid that I was not really male... and remained in the dark ages managing my life till the nineties, then I knew that I was not unique and could make changes... still taken time and bit of unravelling still to happen.

BTW I'm in IT too...Architecture and management... tough industry!

Look forward to seeing you about

L Katy

Hi V M & Katy.  Thanks so much, you're all so sweet here.

Katy, on the subject of work.  I think it's sometimes hard for people who are feminine by nature to be in the IT field.  I think we see the world differently than the sort of rigid & authoritarian way that is often required.

I'm learned to grow with it, and am hopefully still growing.  For instance I write vertical market application programs, and it used to drive me crazy that people would interrupt me by calling me on the phone or even in person about issues with the apps.  I would get incensed that they wouldn't send me an email or fill out a web form to report the issue. 

This is big, broad, and perhaps stereo-typing philosophy, but it has proven effective for me.  I finally accepted the fact that I'm completely powerless over the world around me, and I consider it a feminine quality.  The only way I can gain any sort of control is to help nurture (another feminine quality) what I find valuable, and accept the rest.  If people are going to interrupt me with their issues, that's part of who I am, a nurturer, and I need to go with it.

Thanks,

Gwen

Welcome to Susan's.