I had majo hang up going full time. it wasd all thoughts! when i did go full time people only asked me what they should call me now. I found I gained respect transitioning and lost very little. some guys I knew decided to not talk to me anymore and some hit on me. Girls became friendlier and most people in town found out who i am and would yell " Hi Anela" asthey drove by. It all was in my head, life got easier but one thing. it was hard to find work.
So I advise to stop thinking, thoughts are fear and go as one feels. I had been on HRT so long and as dumping my game and loosing and forgetting all the male manerisms I taught myself that without trying strangers wgere using female pronouns. I rebuild boats and would dress like a guy who renuilds boats and get mammed! This led me to believe I can go full time but still hid behind fear. a bunch of people where rumoring that I wanted to steal guys wives and girlfriends and i ended up loosing friends and work because of these rumors and so I just transitioned after everyone hated me and then they could see why i was friends with women. the waiting to come out cost me was the lesson here. I hid behind thoughts and when i came out people liked me better.
My own brother in this town does not think a thing of it. He has helped my by finding work and letting me stay when unfortinate things happened to me. he also never questioned why i transitioned. i am just his brother gone sister but he stills calls me his brother. however the people who have known you do not see the woman you are and they dont mean to be rude but the subconscious mind has learned you in one way so it takes a conscious effort to pronoun you.
I have learned much over the years of peoples behavior to my changes but above all noticed its a bigger deal to the thoughts of the transitioner than the obsurver. For those just starting HRT. If you are older and masculine just know you will not be in two years. instead of thoughts killing you just live life and first think about what you learned outside your natural feelings to pass as your birth gender. ( Kind of forgot we have Fto M in here sorry) and it will begin to go away. You will notice as time goes by , all the worriing you did was useless waiste of time and emotion.
It is also best to not tell people you are transitioning but to show it. manerisms change and they say, " are you gay" and you just blurt it out, " No, I'm in transition to female" ( that was an example of my experience)
Your transitioning experience is like a fingerprint. If you are married it is best your spouce know imediatly, children will feel they dont matter if you wait with them as well. friends will not understand and get lost in thoughts. My brother found out after i got back from Oahu from my orchiechtomy. my wife knew as soon as i made the decission,
So to contribute to this thread, your heart and gut feeling is why you decided to transition and follow the feelings from that place for all the decissions you make on that path and dont get lost in the " what if" thoughts. Those thaughts will rob you and steel from you. remember, you are a woman or man inside and your passability is being that from inside. the mind of others will see what they have determined they are looking at. if everything about you sends the signal of your chosen gender it does not matter, most people will see that gender. its like hypnosis .
Sometimes moving for some of you on the mainland is a step in your transition. This should be something you work on first because some places can be dangerous to transition. I live Hawaii and feel this is one of the best places to transition. I went to a spiritual expo in california and people in california had no hang up at me either.
do what your heart feelings tell you. after all, you are correcting a mistake and not making a mistake. You are transitioning because you love yourself enough to do this.
With my love to you, Anela,,,
