Over the last few months I have spent a lot of time travelling and coming out to close family and friends, all with positive responses! On Tuesday I came out on Facebook, and I received soooooo much positive feedback it is truly overwhelming! I have spent the last couple days trying to respond to everyone in between bouts of crying, I am so happy to finally be myself and have the support and love of so many of my friends and family. Now I can focus on getting ready to go full time! (shooting for mid-August, facial hair is still a pain even after 180 hours of electrolysis).

It has been difficult and scary to be so open with everyone, but it has been so rewarding and I feel so much love! I have not been on this site much the last couple months with life being such a whirlwind, but I am not sure I would have been able to reach this level of self acceptance without every one of you sharing your experiences. Thank you all so much!

Got so excited I forgot to add my facebook post! I borrowed parts from some others on this site, I hope you don't mind 

Dear Facebook Friends and Family:

A lot of changes have been happening in my life, and I feel that it is time to let you all know what is going on.
I'm transgender.

This means that even though I was born biologically male, on the inside I feel like a female. This has caused me a lot of shame, confusion, and depression throughout my life. I have decided that I want to start transitioning medically and legally to make the outside match how I feel inside. This is not a decision that I'm making lightly. I've felt this way my whole life.

While Robyn is not my legal name yet, I hope that you can respect my wishes and start calling me by my chosen name when the time comes, as well as using she/her pronouns when referring to me.
I know that a lot of you have known me as a boy named Robert for a long time. So please know that I'm not expecting this change to happen overnight. Transitioning is a process and I expect to be in Robert/Robyn limbo for a time while we all adjust. I only ask that you make the effort.

The reason you see this is because at some point in our lives we developed a relationship that I cherished, and I sincerely hope to be able to continue that relationship and have your acceptance, and possibly even support.

I started a blog when I started Hormone Replacement Therapy in March, which explains everything in much greater detail. Feel free to check it out at www.robrobyn.weebly.com. If there is anything you would like to know about my own situation or what it means to be transgender, please feel free to ask me and I promise to answer as honestly as possible.

Anne Speckhard, Ph.D., wrote "The complex idea of gender may never be fully understood, but with acceptance and compassion on all parts, we may come to peace with the fact that identifying oneself by gender is a fundamental part of the 'human experience' and likely always will be". Please keep this in mind, and with an open heart and an open mind I see no reason why our relationships cannot be stronger than ever.

Oh congratulations Robyn!  That's a very beautiful and eloquent post you made.  I'm so happy for you (and envious  )

Best of luck moving forward, you sound very happy and I'm sure you'll continue to be so.

Congrats on the closet busting!

I posted on FaceBite -- Bastille Day, July 14, 2015 -- four days ago.. (I'll post my FaceBite announcement  below.)

No drama here, no grand entrance into the gymnasium for the prom, wearing a gown rather than a tux. Erika at CostCo demonstrated (We've never spoken, concerns about invading her private space) . . . Erika demonstrated a glacially paced transition over the course of about 18 months.

Tank tops under . . . then lace trimmed tanks. She gradually transitioned from long pants to "clam diggers" -- mid calf "cargo shorts" which BTW are virtually the same for M and F. Dropped the socks,  bare a bit more lower leg/calf. Moved from jogging shoes to beach sandals. Hormones, hair, jewelery.

I've basically followed her lead, but also learned a great number of wardrobe strategies from my cis-F friends. "Coastal Week-End Casual" -- like we're ready to walk in the dunes, on the beach, hang out in town for shopping, restaurant, coffee house. We don't plan/expect to ever "pass" as female, although it's been done here.

"A" here for gender designates: "Alternative" "Androgynous" "Ambiguous" "Activist" . . .

Erika changed her name, and full HRT, electrolysis, etc.

I'm keeping my name, my own ID. Not so much concerned about "passing" as I'm realizing that I'm comfortable "in the middle" and done making excuses why I'm not comfortable being me,

"Jeez! You look confused! Think how I've felt these past six decades! Now it's YOUR turn!"

Coming out is a political act. Gender performance is a political act. (Cf. Dr. Judith Butler, Ph.D. Critical Theory/Gender Theory/Queer Theory, UC Berkeley. Butler's "most accessible" work is "Gender Trouble.")

This is where I get the "Non-Normative Dyad, Gender Hegemony" in my signature.

Anyhow . . . lots and lots of love, support, even a significant number of "Gawd! That's a relief! We know you've been hiding for eons! You're happier now, more authentic -- MORE CUTE!"

Integrated and authentic, that's the mantra . . . Wardrobe now is gender integrated. I have the lacy, floral, girlie stuff -- comfortable, but I look absurd. Ok for around the house, for sleeping, lounging.

And when I'm "out" in public it's all recreational sportswear, F or unisex, or male of my cis-F friends wear it too. Freeely free to move back and forth across the Dyad Divide. NOBODY NOTICES, AND THIS IS A REAL BUBBA, REDNECK, PROVINCIAL BACKWATER ON THE NORTH OREGON COAST.

NOBODY NOTICES, NOBODY COMMENTS, NOBODY CARES

-----------------------------------------------
Allison Wunderland --

July 14 at 10:02pm

Bastille Day !!!

Fete de la Bastille, le Quartorze Juillet.

After some considerable thought -- like six decades -- we have decided that storming the Bastille is a perfect metaphor for blowing the doors off the closet.

My dearest pals understand, & I thank them all for their love, understanding and unflinching support. ♡♡♡

☆☆☆☆☆

Integrity, Authenticity, & always already the me I've always been.


Allison Wunderland --  Heterosexual, since it's a question, even when not active. Google "Mahu" -- Hawaiian culture "middle person" -- Specifying gender on our ID is hegemonic bull->-bleeped-<-.

congrats I went through that ok last month and its been amazing, One weird side effect, outing myself to so many people seems to have broken my filters those little things that say "hey talking about how you like to have fun with yourself when your alone is not a good idea" or "they really don't want or need to know what effect the hormones are having on your sex drive and function" ya those sorta fell apart, trying to fix them right now its a great time for people to ask me questions if they don't mind weird answers :-P

so once again Congrats that mixture of fear, excitement and relive is a wonderful thing.

Serena