I find that my transgender feelings are closely tied to other strong emotions especially sexual feelings and depression except extreme happiness. Is this normal or does this mean my transgender feelings are more of a fetish. Most of the time when I do not have any strong emotions I just feel dead on the inside living day to day.

Honestly I would discuss this topic with a therapist. There could be a lot of things in your past tied into this, or other factors that need to be considered. It could be fetishistic, could be gender dysphoria, or perhaps both. Definitely something you should explore with a professional.

It sounds to me more like you have shut down your emotions to protect yourself, and they only break through when extreme. When the crust breaks for a moment you get a glimpse of what lies inside the shell which clearly does include some dysphoria...

Sadly thats only speculation though, so yes I'd agree that some form of therapy or analysis is probably indicated.

Hi!

Welcome to Susan's    Great to have you here - looking forward to seeing you around the forum.

I guess you need to figure out what you mean by transgender feelings. It's certainly not unusual to feel depressed and dead inside. Working with a therapist or a counsellor could be a useful way to tease out the other issues, where they originate and what you feel you need to do about them.

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Cheers

Grace

big warm welcome to Susan's

Sometimes when you crave something so much it hurts, your mind desensitizes your emotions and feelings, I think I kept my sanity through the years for a similar reason.

But I agree with all before get in front of a therapist, they will help you find your way. Best wishes to you moving forward.

Welcome and look forward to seeing you about the forum's

L Katy